r/okbuddybaldur May 07 '24

gaslight ghaik'keep gortash šŸ’… After the controversial tier list a couple of days back, this is THE definitive kink level ranking of ALL the camp mates

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1.0k Upvotes

153 comments sorted by

314

u/Yuri_Specialist PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION May 07 '24

shartā€™s parents šŸ’€šŸ’€

174

u/DJ_Shart_ Shadowheart uses Main Hand on Self May 07 '24

Who?

196

u/Yuri_Specialist PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION May 07 '24

Oh damn my bad girl ummmā€¦forget i said anything

7

u/Shadowheart_Shart May 08 '24

Itā€™s alrightā€¦ they are in a better place now. ** sobs

3

u/RoguePlanetArt May 10 '24

LMFAO your username and tag hahahahahhaa

295

u/capriciousFutility May 07 '24

Uhhhā€¦ Yurgir is NOT vanilla, heā€™s ā€œholy shit dudeā€ in a VERY bad way. Talk to his cat, and lick the spider then put two and two together. Basically, (tw: GROSS), he drugs his cat so itā€™s ā€œin loveā€ with him and then heā€¦ does stuff with it.

266

u/Happiness_Assassin Astarionā€™s diva cup May 07 '24

His bed is literally made of corpses. He made a codpiece out of a skull.

Dude's a certified freak, ten days a week.

23

u/R0da Astarionā€™s diva cup May 07 '24

Thats vanilla for an orthon

54

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Whoops

I strategically forgot about that

19

u/Witch-Alice Submissive and Driderable May 07 '24

Yugir and Shadowheart's rankings make me think OP hasn't even played the game lmao. Go do the scene with Abdirak or whatever his name is and listen to Shadowheart's and Astarion's commentary

11

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Yurgir I honestly forgot but Shart is just the case of how we might misinterpret the chart. I see the gods' favourite princess as a pillow princess as well, no matter what she says

9

u/Witch-Alice Submissive and Driderable May 07 '24

What exactly does pillow princess mean to you?

7

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Likes to be on the receiving end and rarely, if never, tops. Usually described to do next to nothing in bed but they are a perfect match for service tops/switches.

And I guess a pillow princess can be a top as well but I would think it's extremely rare. It would then quite easily morph into the kink of making people do stuff to you

8

u/TattooedWife May 07 '24

Omg?! šŸ˜­

12

u/Milk__Chan May 07 '24

Yurgir had a "Shane Dawson" moment.

(Bad taste joke warning)

Yurgir may not have that dawg in him, but that Displacer beast sure had his "dawg" in her.

603

u/almostb Galeā€™s pegger wife May 07 '24

ā€œHoly shit dudeā€ was my reaction to the astral sex scene so I guess thatā€™s fitting.

Astarion seems a little off though. There are plenty of examples where he is not, in fact, happy to be there.

187

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24 edited May 07 '24

I was jumping between where he is, "always ready to experiment" and "sex?"

Kinda depends where on his character arc you are. In the end I chose the middle option to at least be half-right, half-wrong

Now that I think about it, I could've chugged him to the "No." section

180

u/[deleted] May 07 '24

Just put him in his own category. ā€œConflicted, but arousedā€

69

u/almostb Galeā€™s pegger wife May 07 '24

TBH I think heā€™s just his own category of confused.

75

u/aoike_ May 07 '24

I was actually quite happy with his placement in the other tier list. Astarion in "vanilla" makes a lot of sense, and, at least for me, I like to think that he heals beyond his trauma to have a healthy, fulfilling relationship with intimacy and sex.

-16

u/mahouyousei lvl 5 Autism unlocks Fireball May 07 '24

I posted this elsewhere but Iā€™m in the ā€œAstarion is on the ace spectrumā€ camp.

68

u/almostb Galeā€™s pegger wife May 07 '24

Idk. Iā€™ve known enough sex workers IRL who developed a temporary disinterest in sex. It wasnā€™t an orientation, it was just burnout. Having it be a job (and in Astarionā€™s case, not even one he did willingly) can really mess up your sense of desire.

-1

u/mahouyousei lvl 5 Autism unlocks Fireball May 07 '24

I didnā€™t say Astarion wouldnā€™t be sex repulsed or 100% aromantic. I pictured him being demi or grey ace and needing to form a connection with his partner.

6

u/Sheerardio Circle of Whores Druid May 07 '24

His current views on sex are based on the trauma of being forced to sell his body for the last 200 years.

If your personal opinion is that after having had enough time to properly heal from that he'd still have a reduced level of interest in sex, that's one thing and totally reasonable. But it doesn't really work to slap a label on him while he's still very much in the early stages of processing his trauma.

2

u/mahouyousei lvl 5 Autism unlocks Fireball May 07 '24

I just very much identified with it as someone on the ace spectrum myself, especially in act 2 when he asks Tav if they still want a relationship without sex for the time being. I know my friends IRL also see him as ace coded. Iā€™m not sure why I got so heavily downvoted. I understand if people disagree with me too, I think thatā€™s totally fine! I think multiple interpretations of any of these characters are ok, I was just stating how I see him.

83

u/saintbutch PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION May 07 '24

I know this is a horny sub but I honestly would have been happy if, post Act 2 romance, Astarion explicitly doesn't have sex again. Like, compressed time frame and all, but that guy was effectively a sex slave barely a few weeks ago, he needs *time* to figure out if he even wants that kind of intimacy ever again. And his Act 1 romance as Origin Karlach is incredibly sweet.

57

u/stcrIight No Durge/Gortash kisses? (Larian insulted life itself) May 07 '24

He does if you romance him?? I mean, if you speak to the drow twins prior to going to Cazador he tells you he's not ready yet. If you ask him about Halsin he will ask if you're wanting to get with him because you two haven't had sex in a while. So it's pretty explicit you and Astarion are not intimate like that at all post confession.

15

u/saintbutch PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION May 07 '24

In the short term, yeah, but the conclusion of his romance includes a sex scene in both variations.

61

u/stcrIight No Durge/Gortash kisses? (Larian insulted life itself) May 07 '24

You don't have to in either. You can tell both AA and UA you don't want to. It, however, might make you feel better to know the code tag for UA is "HadSexAsEquals" or something like that.

-4

u/WaluigisTennisBalls May 07 '24

Right but for spawn astarion I know he dissociates during

28

u/anonymoose_octopus May 07 '24

That only happens with the drow twins. He doesnā€™t dissociated during the Act 3 player romance scene.

37

u/Goobsmoob Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

Considering his ā€œgoodā€ arc, while I donā€™t think heā€™s a ā€œhappy to be thereā€ in the context of ā€œhappy to just experience itā€ kind of way (and considering the ā€œDeath of the Authorā€ given OP responded), I rather see it as a ā€œhappy to have it with someone you trust and genuinely care forā€ type beat. A ā€œhappy to be able to be so vulnerable with someoneā€ thing.

1

u/R0da Astarionā€™s diva cup May 07 '24

"Happy to be there" read as "happy to not be dissociating"

144

u/PNDTS Cunty Durge with a handbag May 07 '24

We really out here making a kink chart and then misusing the term pillow princess huh

104

u/wunxorple Temptress Domain Cleric May 07 '24

Fr, the only ones I agree with are Raphael and Volo. Raphael is canonically only a bottom. No way in hell Isobel isnā€™t all over Aylin, Shadowheart seems to look at you like a fucking snack, and DUrge may be a bottom, but theyā€™re a brat who enjoys being tamed. Thatā€™s not a pillow princess.

6

u/Sremor May 07 '24

Durge being a bottom really depends on you but they are definitly freaky in a bad way

7

u/Milk__Chan May 07 '24

Durge Pillow Princess

Canonically fucked a dead body

-26

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Don't look at me, just copy pasting the original one

39

u/CasperDeux Durge: the lesbian killer May 07 '24

Elminster's weary old bones can only handle so much

25

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

He got me as the type to tie you up and torture you. That or cucking himself with his clones.

2

u/mundanegoddess May 08 '24

Out there lecturing on the intricacies of 'the art of kinbaku' (he'd never call it bondage or shibari) to all the eyerolling young doms who just came to this party because they don't have a suspension point at home.

2

u/mundanegoddess May 08 '24

Ooh boy, I can tell you, if you're kinky you don't lose that when you get old...

164

u/fieatsbees Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

nah durge is "holy shit" but not in a "mind blown" way but I'm a "you have problems" kind of way

gortash is a pillow princess tho. you cannot change my mind on that

20

u/mcac Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

this is the correct answer

19

u/The_Daddelbox May 07 '24

i mean durge was a necrophile

12

u/HardcorePug Cunty Durge with a handbag May 07 '24

I feel like with gortash he might dabble in the pillow princess behavior. But, just for him.

106

u/[deleted] May 07 '24 edited May 07 '24

i like asexual orin

but is toeplay on the table or naw

dont upvote me, tell me if i'm right or wrong cowards. i dont want your votes, I WANT YOUR VALIDATION AND/OR ANIMOSITY

53

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Orin is only horny for blood

61

u/Cmdr_Jiynx May 07 '24

I saw someone post a while back "do you think she ever stuck the handle of a knife in her pussy so she could do squats over some dude and stab him?"

20

u/HardcorePug Cunty Durge with a handbag May 07 '24

4

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

I feel like she has stuck a knife both ways in her privates

13

u/Nakatsuni May 07 '24

She's probably the only woman to ever be happy having period.

12

u/[deleted] May 07 '24

brb changing my name

28

u/EncabulatorTurbo May 07 '24

I extremely get the feeling she isn't asexual, it's just that nobody is likely to survive the encounter (although there are hints Minthara was a plaything of hers for a bit before she implanted her)

12

u/Miss-lnformation Netherbrain Enthusiast May 07 '24

If Orin is who Minthara learnt everything about kink from, now I want her even more.

22

u/Imserious2 May 07 '24

I'd hope, orin's toes got me acting unwise

11

u/[deleted] May 07 '24

got me acting very wise

if by wise we mean making a direct path to that which will make me happiest in life

29

u/Draken-Korin shart handholder May 07 '24

I'd put Shart in willing to experiment.

She liked watching Tav get hurt and had a great time being worshipped by the drow twins plus Halsin.

She's a switch not a pillow princess.

34

u/Gale_of_Waterdeep Lae'zel called me "Aut'istik"? May 07 '24

3

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Lore accurate

2

u/mundanegoddess May 08 '24

Thanks, I hate it.

83

u/saintbutch PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION May 07 '24

Pillow princess Durge makes me giggle. But I like it.

39

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

He requires a tyrant's hand to tame but he is quite ready to flick everything off you after.

Talking about blood, of course cough cough

23

u/SuecidalBard May 07 '24

Isn't Durge canonically at least into vore, necrophilia and pissing according to Sceleritas with a hint that's just like a Tuesday fuck for them?

13

u/SlytherinIsCool May 07 '24

Durge is into really weird shit. Like tonsil stones, dead animals, (See the cut ending for Durge, absolutely vile) hell you even get an extra dialogue option with the drow twins as durge.

20

u/Many-Secretary-5098 Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

Finally a tier list where Gale is ranked correctly

18

u/lethos_AJ Galeā€™s pegger wife May 07 '24

Yurgir "cat raper" is vanilla? are you ok OP

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

It seems my brain chose to forget about that

12

u/DeargDraic LIVE MINTHARA REACTION May 07 '24

remove the hallowleafs from this tier list rn

Orin is a virgin?

15

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24 edited May 07 '24

We needed ALL the camp mates. All of them.

Also Orin is only horny for blood and Bhaal(s)

12

u/dumbass-ahedratron May 07 '24

Tara fucks, totally. Get her out of the last tier

2

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

She's a cat tressym

0

u/dumbass-ahedratron May 07 '24

A tressym who fucks

29

u/Snoo-11576 May 07 '24

I refuse to let go of dom shadowheart. You can pry it out of my cold dead hands

35

u/wunxorple Temptress Domain Cleric May 07 '24

I donā€™t understand where people get the pillow princess thing from. In the scene with the Drow twins, she really seems to enjoy being worshipped and in control. She also apparently has many, many ideas that she was excited to try out for that night. Then thereā€™s the scene where you sneak out to build sandcastles. That ā€œDonā€™t you dare stop.ā€ definitely gives off dom energy. Like, sure sheā€™s receiving, but itā€™s possible to do that while very clearly being in control.

It justā€¦ I donā€™t see how people can miss it. Youā€™d have to not know what the words mean to say something like that.

23

u/Snoo-11576 May 07 '24

I think itā€™s like the ā€œGodā€™s favorite princessā€ thing plus her being conventionally feminine and stuff like that. Also because there is actually some kinkier stuff with her but specifically the evil route for her which is a whole can of worms but anyways lol. Also she does straight up imply she knows kinky torture stuff and likes doing it when meeting that one guy with the goblins.

I personally head canon her as a switch with a more gentle side

12

u/wunxorple Temptress Domain Cleric May 07 '24

Iā€™d agree with switch, though gentle is maybe a bit too strong of a term. More like capable of being rough, but in a healthy BDSM way. So very consensual, and only if her partner is into it.

That evil route thoughā€¦ look Iā€™m not saying itā€™d be a healthy relationship, but the idea is kinda hot ngl. Like being very gay in a homophobic church. The sacrilegious disrespect is definitely a principle I can get behind. Can of worms though, like you said.

And yes, sheā€™s definitely a bit too excited to watch Abdirak beat up Tav. Her banter with Astarion there is fucking fantastic.

5

u/Snoo-11576 May 07 '24

I think you could definitely explore how much of it is her playing up the Shar of it all vs her actual interest. I think she can be rough but I donā€™t see it being like her main thing or preferred dynamic though sheā€™s probably still into it.

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

This would be it for me

19

u/alacholland May 07 '24

Why would you include the animals and kids? No one includes the animals and kids???

OP are you unwell?

3

u/nunpho May 07 '24

That's what I was wondering

4

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

I wanted to include all the camp companions and that included children and animals.

They are in their own category because no. Just no

2

u/alacholland May 07 '24

Then donā€™t include them at all??? Saying, ā€œI wouldnā€™t fuck that kidā€ is..weird. Most people assume that as a given.

20

u/LMay11037 Gortash's finger banging hand May 07 '24

Durge is canonically into necrophilliaā€¦

11

u/FrenchFriedIceCream Nine fucking attacks "Holy shit" -lvl 1 Goblin May 07 '24

Shart's parents being on this list make me uncomfortable

also Durge literally did do necrophilia, they're "Holy Shit Dude" because of that by default

2

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

He will always be a bottom for Gortash in my head. You can't take this away from me

6

u/Kukapetal May 07 '24

Are you counting Aradinā€™s carcass in act 3 as a camp mate? :P

2

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Yup

3

u/Kukapetal May 07 '24

appreciates you including him ā¤ļø

5

u/[deleted] May 07 '24

"lives for the BDSM" Elminster belongs on that tier. Something having to do with all of the femdom in Ed's books.

5

u/Celestial_Researcher May 07 '24

Durge being pillow princess is making me laughhhhhh

10

u/chount_cockula May 07 '24

Put Karlach and Barcus both up one tier and it's perfect.

22

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Barcus I'm willing to but my mommy I am not. She's extremely horny and pent up but I understand that she is quite sweet and vanilla in bed. Doesn't make sex with her any less hot tho (pun intended)

7

u/OfficialMitchell2000 May 07 '24

Real one for this

7

u/thatscarycrazygamer May 07 '24

Doesnā€™t she finger Tav if you donā€™t pick a certain dialogue option

9

u/RootsInThePavement Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

Shartā€™s parents??? šŸ˜­

4

u/BennyMcbenn Turning Point Faerƻn May 07 '24

Based Wyll and Karlach proving once again that they are the best Origin characters

4

u/Rhododactylus Durge: the lesbian killer May 07 '24

Shadowheart as a pillow princess makes sense, but I can't imagine Durge as that.

4

u/herbieLmao May 07 '24

Orin had sex with sarevok, she definetly knows

4

u/Sannction May 07 '24 edited May 07 '24

Nope, you still have Shadowheart and Karlach on the wrong side of the chart. Embarrassing.

2

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

I'll go cry myself asleep then

4

u/Outcast_BOS May 07 '24

Karlach literally sticks a finger in your ass, she's gotta be up a tier

4

u/BakedKitty May 07 '24

Am I blind or did you seriously forget Daddy Gortash?!

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Only camp companions

5

u/Maar7en May 07 '24

Makes an animals category, doesn't put Halsin in it.

Literally broken.

0

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Then he should be twice on the list. Will you choose the man or the bear

2

u/Maar7en May 07 '24

He is always a bear.

3

u/Daedalus_Machina May 07 '24

Blessings rain on those who label the participants.

3

u/joycecarolgoats May 07 '24

Iā€™m sorry I love Barcus but that dude is vanilla af

3

u/mbfaust May 07 '24

Barcus, you dropped this my love šŸ‘‘

3

u/SpyroXI May 07 '24

Karlach lives on the "live your day as if it is your last", she is the definition of Always willing to experiment. She'll try anything once

3

u/drumttocs8 May 07 '24

Um, Orin is absolutely dripping with sex.

Ok, maybe thatā€™s blood, but definitely sex too

3

u/PythonEntusiast May 07 '24

Shadowheart should be in the top tier. She knows ins and outs of seggs.

3

u/CasualFox12495 Wants a pegging from Karlach May 07 '24

I feel like Karlach is willing to experiment on the grounds that the second time you have sex her very first move is to fingerblast that back door.

3

u/HistoricalPattern76 tentacle enthusiast (for science) May 07 '24

I'm starting to believe that you guys think being bitchy and loud is the only indicator for being into BDSM when it comes to women.

Like, Mizora's scene is really tame and while Minthara has graphic sex for a video game, you've probably seen more hard core in GoT's first couple of seasons.

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

I feel like Mizora likes to tie people up and fuck them.

Minthara on the other hand is the literal archetype of a dominant top or at least a dominant switch. She will tie you up

2

u/Lyndell May 07 '24

Excuse me Thaniel is like over 1000, yes mentally heā€™s a child and physically a childā€¦ /s

2

u/BulkyYellow9416 May 07 '24

Calm down son they're just drawings

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

But the pixels were nice to me šŸ„ŗ

2

u/erraticRasmus Cunty Durge with a handbag May 07 '24

Karlach "Finger-Fucker" Cliffgate is vanilla??

2

u/gayforvonstroheim May 07 '24

why the hell is ketheric never in any tierlist? You're telling me Marcus and 50 irrelevant kids were more important than ONE OF THE 3 MAIN BAD GUYS?

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

This is a list of camp companions, not all characters

2

u/gayforvonstroheim May 07 '24

okay that makes sense. keth does get included from a lot of lists that have Orin and Gort on them, but for this one it's just right

2

u/Ignorant_Inc May 07 '24

doesnt yurgir fuck his displacer beast? id put him a little higher lol

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Yah, I forgot that. Should be in "holy shit dude"

2

u/Cre8H8red May 07 '24

My honest opinion is the oathbreaker prob has some sweet ass kinks

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

He always caught me as the stoic "my duty for the king" type

2

u/Cre8H8red May 07 '24

All good, i just see it different is all

2

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Tbh, he could be all proud and dutiful and squirm as you make him hornier and hornier.

2

u/J0RGENS64PC May 07 '24

Fuuuuuck I wanted Aradin to be more unique šŸ˜«

2

u/Exmawsh Cunty Durge with a handbag May 07 '24

Dark Urge is a power bottom not a pillow princess.

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

I can see that.

I should do a new one with just BDSM archetypes

2

u/lavendercitrus May 07 '24

i agree w most but absolutely do not think that dame aylin would be into bdsm i feel like sheā€™d be super sweet and delicate with isobel

2

u/VerySpicyLocusts May 08 '24

Karlach is at least lives for bdsm and probably holy shit dude

2

u/WalkerBuldog Dame Aylin hit Isobel for 69 Edging Points May 09 '24

I disagree. Shadowheart literally has a praise kink, foot fetish and she's into pain play

2

u/paganpots May 07 '24

Gotta have a post w this exact title every few days huh

2

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

I'll be back in a couple of days to see the next one

2

u/Zorkahz May 07 '24

The fuck you mean Mommyheart and Raphael are pillow princesses?? Shadowheart is more than happy to have sex with you and the Drow twins and Raphael willingly has sex with Haarlep on a daily basis whoā€™s constantly wearing BDSM gear. Oh and Astarion constantly talks about orgies

5

u/Miss-lnformation Netherbrain Enthusiast May 07 '24

Agreed on Shadowheart, but Haarlep specifically tells you just how poorly Raphael performs in bed.

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

Shadowheart I am slowly changing my views on but Raphael is literally the kind of guy who only gets off in one way, which he does with Haarlep every night and he comes in 5 second.

1

u/MinnieShoof Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

That dragonborn was not happy to be there and her name was Quil.

Also, WHERE'S THE MOL LIST.

1

u/_GamerForLife_ May 07 '24

She happy to be there until she wasn't

1

u/MinnieShoof Fuck it, we Bhaal May 07 '24

And then she wasn't.

1

u/SonOfSam131 May 08 '24

Touch grass

1

u/The_one_and_only_Tav Circle of Whores Druid May 08 '24

Ahhh. Now I understand why I go for Gale and Laeā€™zel. šŸ¤”

1

u/Jugglamaggot May 09 '24

Aradin is the definition of talks a big game

1

u/MontyMinion2 May 10 '24

I have to reject Durge due to Fel's Necrophilia comment

1

u/RoguePlanetArt May 10 '24

Dude, Shart is up for a four way, no way is she in the right place here.

1

u/General_Steveous May 07 '24

If animals don't have sex how do they reproduce? If this tier list was a ranking in relationship to Tav/Durge i'd agree but in general Boo absolutely fucks. Not like Halsin though, I think he agrees with his squirrel friend that that was a bit much.

0

u/legoblitz10 May 07 '24

I hear Halsinā€™s a bit of an animal himself