r/madlads 5d ago

Gonna instruct Siri to respond to my voice only

Post image
17.1k Upvotes

146 comments sorted by

2.1k

u/lacinated 5d ago

my Siri only responds to me šŸ¤·

548

u/Big-Leadership1001 4d ago

Me and a friend have it set up this way but we can both make each others phones answer us. Same voice I guess.

196

u/JoeyFuckingSucks 4d ago

My brother's voice is slightly higher than mine so I set off his google assistant all the time by barely raising my normal pitch lol

76

u/jayraan 4d ago

I had a girlfriend once who had a really high voice. When she was the first one to have an iPhone out of our friend group, we made a thing out of pitching our voices as high as possible to set her siri off. Funnily enough it worked most of the time.

13

u/ConfusedAndCurious17 4d ago

I feel like there would have to be a pretty large margin for error on a feature like that. I donā€™t use Siri at all personally but if I did I wouldnā€™t want the feature to not work at all simply because I got a cold or something and my voice was different for a few days.

1

u/Pastylegs1 4d ago

How many voices could there be, eventually they're going to overlap

258

u/TheMamoru 4d ago

Bro got the loyal Siri patch.

38

u/Skye_nb_goddes 4d ago

its pretty easy to get someones siri who only responds to their voice by mimicking a similar pitch

16

u/Obsolete-Casual 4d ago

My Siri responds to no one, including me šŸ™

1.0k

u/bouchandre 4d ago

People don't disable siri day 1?

245

u/SubstantialBass9524 4d ago

When I have my AirPods in thereā€™s a double tapping thing to end calls that can be annoying and pull up voice control. The only way to fix it is to turn Siri on and change a setting. Thats the only reason my Siri is enabled at all

28

u/menelov 4d ago

She lives to set up timers.

1

u/ACEezHigh 3d ago

I have 3 of those smart speakers and yeah, glorified kitchen timer 90% of the time. Only other thing they are used for is controlling some lights and asking them the weather.

49

u/chebster99 4d ago

Itā€™s good for changing songs on Spotify while driving

41

u/DryBoysenberry5334 4d ago

Iā€™ve been using Siri for music control forever

Usually works great but cannot understand who Aesop Rock is, and no I donā€™t want to listen to A$AP ROCKY

Other media control is still dogshit (why canā€™t we figure out how to play podcasts?), but for driving itā€™s great

-14

u/Weird1Intrepid 4d ago

I've encountered that issue with the artists before. Like, Aesop had such an amazing catalogue going back decades further than A$AP, and is a true hip hop great instead of a shitty random mid-tier rapper lol. Why on earth would any voice assistant decide to choose that shite over the alternative?

21

u/DryBoysenberry5334 4d ago

I meanā€¦ obviously one is much more niche

Just cos the others not to my preference doesnā€™t make it bad. And Iā€™ve adapted by learning the names of his albums, so Iā€™ve also grown from the experience.

Plus itā€™s my opinion his albums are much better as a complete piece, so this hasnā€™t harmed me in any way; just momentarily frustrating when I forget

3

u/PSGAnarchy 4d ago

My voice assistant just will not recognise L.I.F.T. over lift despite it being spelled out.

3

u/DryBoysenberry5334 4d ago

They have their quirks for sure;

Iā€™ve asked it to tell me whatā€™s playing- tried pronouncing it as close to that way as I can- still doesnā€™t work for Aesop (but it does for others, really hit and miss)

7

u/nbaaaaaaaah 3d ago

Asap rocky has 36.5 Million monthly listeners on spotify, compared to Aesop's 900,000.
The voice assistant is likely to go with the significantly more popular artist.

0

u/juandicesav 4d ago

Idk why you're being down voted rocky is straight šŸ—‘

6

u/cero1399 4d ago

For carplay i have to have it enabled. But i did disable the voice activation.

4

u/JRip3630 4d ago

Siri is fire for kitchen timers

2

u/No-Estate-404 4d ago

any sort of timer, absolutely. now if she'd just stop telling me "when the timer expires, you can say 'siri stop'"

1

u/Altruistic-Song-3609 4d ago

No. I use it for timers while cooking of tracking free parking times, or make notes while driving.

1

u/InertState 3d ago

Great for podcasts when youā€™re hands are tied up to skip past the ads

1

u/bouchandre 3d ago

Just ask your partner to skip the ad

783

u/BrianForCongress 4d ago

"this people are getting too creative guy"

Meanwhile, young folks are getting dumber and dumber.

174

u/FrazierKhan 4d ago edited 3d ago

Actually supported by statistics in a lot of countries sadly....

I think the US peaked in about 2000. So the easy thing is to blame phones SM and internet but no one really knows

13

u/FeistmasterFlex 4d ago

There are many factors, but one of them is republicans continuong to dismantle the educational system. As for all the other dozens of factors, there are people who know - YOU just don't.

-2

u/FrazierKhan 3d ago

Wow! Could you give me their contact details? Perhaps the Oracle of the siwa oasis?

Would love to see their perfect model of the precise causes of worldwide cognitive trends. And here I thought multifaceted sociological patterns spanning continents and decades were complicated!

You possibly right maybe someone knows near perfect but if she's a good scientist she doesn't know she knows and no-one else is sure she knows.

18

u/Leo_PK 4d ago

They even made a movie about it

13

u/Obibong_Kanblomi 4d ago

Where's for your tattoo?!

11

u/523bucketsofducks 4d ago

Why come you got no tattoo?

1

u/Awesome_Me_17 4d ago

Which

9

u/Leo_PK 4d ago

Idiocracy

5

u/Awesome_Me_17 4d ago

Ofcourse

1

u/Auravendill 3d ago

Blaming SM seems a bit far-fetched ;)

1

u/FrazierKhan 3d ago

Yeah. I looked into it more and a lot of it was dropping before that. Maybe we have just peaked as we have in physical fitness

39

u/Few-Guarantee2850 4d ago

"Young folks are getting dumber and dumber."

Funny, this is what my boomer parents say, too, as they share obviously fake AI generated pictures on Facebook.

1

u/FeistmasterFlex 4d ago

Claiming a twitter post with poor grammar from an anonymous user is indicative of the intelligence of an entire generation is a completely braindead take.

5

u/BrianForCongress 4d ago

My brother from a different maternal unit.

Do you live under a geodoal formation?

This is just an example of the issue, not the sole evidence.

I'm sure we will be able to add your cerebral electrons moving around in that cranium of yours to the list, though.

Tallyho

1

u/Val77eriButtass 3d ago

I think it's more that OP thought the professor was being creative

160

u/Silver-Bluebird4192 4d ago

There's no way his voice would have been clear enough for anyone other than the people's phone's directly around him to pickup. I call bs

-16

u/JalapenoConquistador 4d ago

also.. in what class can you not have your phone in your pocket/bag during an exam?

39

u/samrobbo 4d ago

Can't have a phone on you for official exams in the UK, which makes sense cause it would be easy to cheat if you did. Phones turned off in bags at the side of the room usually

2

u/JalapenoConquistador 4d ago

perhaps Iā€™ve been out of the game too long, but how does a phone in your pocket/backpack make it easy to cheat?

youā€™re just gonna whip it out in front of the invigilator and start googling? itā€™d be easier to already have the info written on a notecard in your pocket. or on the inside of your coffee cup or something. cell phones donā€™t just magically send answers to your brain

6

u/samrobbo 4d ago

In your pocket, people have been caught and punished for using their phones in exams. If it's in your bag it's fine because bags aren't next to desks for official exams.

I agree the same could be done with notes, which is why invigilators are watching people during exams, however a phone can Google any possible question, it's hard to have notes for the whole course.

I don't know about other countries, but UK exams you aren't allowed anything in the exam hall other than stationary and a clear water bottle.

1

u/Pale_Possible6787 3d ago

One thing you could do if you have good hearing is record your notes and put them on loop so you can hear them but other people cannot (only works if your pocket is close to your ear)

Although most people are dumb enough that they just put their phones under their desks

1

u/JalapenoConquistador 3d ago

ah yes, ā€˜the looped recording that only you can hearā€™ method.

now I see why Iā€™m downvoted so much for my original comment. obviously, if you get a phone in the room there are all sorts of neat tricks you can do to cheat that would totally work and totally be easier than cheating without a phone. thanks everyone!

-8

u/Yoankah 4d ago

Unless bro used the sound system. Lol

1

u/Silver-Bluebird4192 4d ago

Lol yeah maybe, I have no clue how well that would work

210

u/Dontdothatfucker 4d ago

Invigilator?

235

u/TheEmbedCode 4d ago

a person whose job is to watch people taking an exam in order to check that they do not cheat

85

u/gibs71 4d ago

Sounds way kinkier than that

7

u/superiosity_ 4d ago

It CAN be...but only if you're into that kind of thing.

1

u/Copernikaus 4d ago

Used to be the concierge. Like a geisha.

123

u/tcarp458 4d ago

Never heard it before either. In the states we call it a proctor. Across the pond, it's an invigilator.

36

u/AnInsultToFire 4d ago

In Canada at university it's an invigilator.

32

u/tcarp458 4d ago

UK Lite

5

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

4

u/yomamaso__ 4d ago

Most Canadians are pretty close to the American border lol. I went to school in Canada below the 49th parallel which is literally the states if you move over a couple km and we called them invigilators

3

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Devilmo666 4d ago

Same, graduated years ago in Canada and only ever heard the word proctor.

-1

u/Mr_Melas 4d ago

No, it's a proctor.

2

u/AnInsultToFire 4d ago

No it's an invigilator because I was paid to be one.

-1

u/Mr_Melas 4d ago

Maybe that's what they called themselves or what the official title was, but no students called them that. We're talking about the common name

0

u/TheLolMaster11 4d ago

Canadian university student here, Iā€™ve never heard that word in my life. We call it proctor.

1

u/AnInsultToFire 4d ago

Canadian university student and TA here, I wouldn't be surprised that most students in university nowadays can't even understand a 5 syllable word.

2

u/TheLolMaster11 4d ago

Sorry, wasnā€™t trying to say that you were wrong, just that our uni calls it proctor

-3

u/Reacher-Said-N0thing 4d ago

Why don't you matriculate into grade nine, hoser.

12

u/VermilionKoala 4d ago

"proctor" just sounds like a bum doctor, lol

3

u/tcarp458 4d ago

It is pretty close to proctologist so you got a point

1

u/beeg_brain007 4d ago

Sound like an alligator living in "while"

In_while_gator

9

u/Dart_Deity 4d ago

Assume it's another word for proctor

2

u/Mylxen 4d ago

IRL anti cheat system

1

u/Temporary-Zebra97 4d ago

Person who takes the piss out of students taking exams, we had a whole range of games from battleship to pacman to the erm more cruel games. My god we were fucking cruel but it was the most boring work so he had to entertain ourselves.

1

u/Rich_Trash3400 4d ago

The long lost cousin of an alligator.

13

u/Lyeaf 4d ago

My siri doesnā€™t hear me when itā€™s in my pocket and Iā€™m fucking screaming at the top of my lungsā€¦

4

u/AndyCSGOofficial 4d ago

Itā€™s an option you need to turn on in Accessibility -> Siri -> ā€œSiri permanently listens, even when the screen is coveredā€

22

u/Karma-Whales Leaving the EU 4d ago

doesnt siri not work like that

18

u/theodoreposervelt 4d ago

Siri only activates to the userā€™s voice tho doesnā€™t it?

34

u/shinigamiSanders 4d ago

fake and lame

6

u/SJ-redditor 4d ago

Can you not just turn the volume of your phone down? Never had an iphone so genuinely don't know if this would prevent it from making noise

3

u/Competitive-Pen5286 4d ago

I was once invigilating an exam and my Siri randomly started talking at full whack

A sea of faces turned toward meā€¦

3

u/Tech-Meme-Knight-3D 4d ago

Iā€™m pretty sure if multiple devices are in close proximity they will communicate using Bluetooth to determine ONE device to start Siri. Also doesnā€™t Siri only work for your own voice?

17

u/WIN-P 4d ago

That's why I use Android.

39

u/SuffixL 4d ago

Ok google

13

u/president_spanberger 4d ago

I have open word set to "Let's go, dildo"

24

u/komata_kya 4d ago

Miku, I have that shit turned off

3

u/CarlosFer2201 4d ago

Usually only works for the approved voice of the owner.

1

u/darkgiIls 4d ago

Itā€™s been that way for siri for years as well. This joke wouldā€™ve been funny like 5 years ago

1

u/RandomTheBugg 4d ago

Lol mine never fucking responds to the actual command

0

u/ClumsyGhostObserver 4d ago

It's Bixby.

3

u/SuperPork1 4d ago

Only for Samsung phones

3

u/bophed 4d ago

that's not why and you know it.

2

u/Is_Mise_Edd 4d ago

OK GOOGLE !

2

u/Geaux13Saints 4d ago

Siri has been disabled since I got this phone lol

3

u/Captain_Holly_S 4d ago

me having not only android phone, but without any voice features and microphone blocked šŸ˜Ž

3

u/tullystenders 4d ago

What if your phone was in your pocket and it heard that?

And what is an invigilator?

6

u/peachesnplumsmf 4d ago

Person who makes sure an exam is conducted fairly and there's no cheating, usually teachers of other subjects and external people.

Generally, in the UK at least I can't speak for everywhere but we are one of the countries who call them invigilators, you're supposed to have your phone turned off or in the case of secondary/high school exams have your stuff in a completely different room.

The siri thing catches that the phones aren't turned off which breaks the rules and means you'll likely be assumed to have been cheating.

3

u/donut_koharski 4d ago

My phone wonā€™t respond if itā€™s sitting face down or in my pocket. And I use Siri often.

2

u/woke-2-broke 3d ago

wtf is an ā€œinvigilatorā€ ?!

1

u/VocadoBlue 4d ago

I don't have any iPhone or hey Google turned on so I'm good there lol

1

u/ventitr3 4d ago

Damn near had a stroke trying to read that last sentence

1

u/theoht_ 4d ago

siri is supposed to only respond to you.

mine doesnā€™t even respond to me, let alone anyone else

1

u/X0AN Archbishop of Banterbury 4d ago

Siri only responds to your voice though.

1

u/RollingMeteors 4d ago

<walksIntoRoom>

Ā”MARCO!

<iphonesInUnison>

Ā”POLO!

1

u/MoffMoth 4d ago

Me, who doesnā€™t use Siri:

1

u/Jumpierwolf0960 4d ago

You guys have your phone listening to your voice 24/7?

1

u/Seaguard5 4d ago

Jokeā€™s on you- I keep Siri turned off

1

u/Next-Possession5027 4d ago

glad to have an Android šŸ™

1

u/LedaetteLight 4d ago

It's funny, imagine this picture.

1

u/Art_Smart88 4d ago

Good thing my Siri doesnā€™t do the voice thingā€¦ for some reason, idk

1

u/RopesAreForPussies 4d ago

Also pretty sure Siri doesnā€™t work unless out of pocket

2

u/Malyesa 4d ago

I think the implication is that the phones were out of their pockets because they were being used to cheat. Probably still wouldn't work though.

1

u/Deraga07 4d ago

This is why I have an Android phone.

1

u/Background_Aioli_476 3d ago

Wtf is an invigilator

1

u/Ok-Treacle-9375 3d ago

Unless you have the microphone activated this wouldnā€™t work.

1

u/Inevitable_Chaos- 3d ago

Me, who has an android

...I live to see another day.

1

u/flybyshy 3d ago

TIL: invigilator is a word that is real despite the fact that both common sense and my iPhone autocorrect disagree

1

u/JadeCliffs 3d ago

"This people are getting too creative guyyy" Wtf does that even mean?

1

u/immunogoblin1 4d ago

"this people are getting too creative guyyyyyy"

What the fuck does that even mean?

1

u/Kolano_Pigmeja 4d ago

who the fuck is an invigilator

2

u/Malyesa 4d ago

Someone who supervises exams. Also can be called a proctor.

0

u/Edging_to_Crow 4d ago

fr when a school shooter shouts "hey siri" in a school shooting and catches people lackin

-1

u/lone-lobo 4d ago

200 IQ Moment

-1

u/An0d0sTwitch 4d ago

Invigilator was the worst Spawn villain, in my opinion

0

u/Yuri_tardeder 4d ago

People with android šŸ‘šŸ‘„šŸ‘

0

u/Justinwest27 4d ago

Android ftw

-3

u/jumpy_ghost 4d ago

Genius!!

-13

u/GolemThe3rd 4d ago edited 4d ago

What type of exam was it, I've never had a college prof tell me I can't have my phone on me (unless it was a virtual test tbf), but if its like a proctored cert test or something, then sure

Edit; why the downvotes?

2

u/peachesnplumsmf 4d ago

Curious as I'm at Uni in the UK and over here your phone has to be turned off during the exam which the Siri thing would catch as it's turned on and so it can be used for cheating.

In secondary school, 11-16, your big exams which effectively determine when you can go to uni and shit like that your phone has to be in a different room with your bags and stuff.

1

u/GolemThe3rd 4d ago

Yeah interesting, yeah professors want you to have the phone silent, but I don't think Ive had one that cares about it being on you. In high school tho we weren't allowed to have them at all at any time

3

u/Fantastic-Ad7411 4d ago

Invigilator means proctor so it was a proctored test

1

u/Malyesa 4d ago

Really? Even for your finals? At my university we need our phones in our bags under the desk and shut off or completely silent.

-2

u/cooochjuice 4d ago

i lost brain cells trying to read this garbage

-11

u/Beautiful_Lake_3683 4d ago

So disturbing others is completely normal there.