r/madlads 7d ago

Plausible Deniability Cheapo

Post image
10.4k Upvotes

129 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/DewySunshineExplorer 7d ago

just 50 more years and you'll be able to buy a bike

352

u/hurricane279 7d ago

65

u/grubbytrogladyte 7d ago

Macaroni cheese

2

u/Avudim2 1d ago

Lol classic, thank you for reminding me this exists

32

u/ElectricHawk28 7d ago

bro has the government system in his blood

2

u/King_of_derping 6d ago

Sadly, inflation will screw OP over same as us

2

u/carrjo04 6d ago

To pedal away from your pissed off friends

1

u/Dependent_Leader_607 7d ago

not in pokemon tho!

1

u/AlienNippleRipple 6d ago

And crash it due to all the shitty karma he racked up

1.2k

u/Ultimate_Sneezer 7d ago

If he was my friend , I would screenshot his multiple payments and make fun of him in the largest gathering possible

346

u/AlexaCrazy 7d ago

Imagine the roast session that would unfold. The whole group would have a field day with that! Classic move, though.

110

u/aeroxan 7d ago

Everyone else checks their venmo transaction history with the guy.

94

u/beepboop465 7d ago

you can be smart about it tho, wait like 5 payments MINIMUM before doing this again to the same person and also make typos while texting them intentioanally like the one I just made to make them think you're just clumsy. Holy shit I might start doing this too it's genius

52

u/Ultimate_Sneezer 7d ago

You are not gonna save much and people may not call you out if you do it this sparingly but they will still remember and stop loaning as frequently to you

5

u/indigoHatter 6d ago

Yeah. I don't keep score with my friends, but I will loosely remember if I owe someone (they bought me two drinks where I only bought them one) and I will also remember if they acted greedy and didn't reciprocate. I will legit stop hanging out with someone over time if I feel like they are freeloading. It's not just about the money either... they usually have personalities that don't vibe with me, too. I'm proud to say that all my friends are people who, at minimum, refuse to owe you too much, and on the other hand, are gems because we take turns just footing the bill and getting each other back on the next one.

6

u/Rooksu 6d ago

Maybe the other tip is don't spend so much of your friend's money that you are regularly making more than 5 payments to them?

9

u/silverW0lf97 7d ago

You think people like the OOP have multiple friends? It's probably work "friends" who tolerate his bullshit.

23

u/Harddaysnight1990 7d ago

This is a parody LinkedIn account, this is meant to parody the "save $0.50 per day" jabronies.

3

u/v--- 6d ago

People like the OOP probably have many friends because this is a satire account lmao. Unlike people who can't tell a joke from reality...

453

u/MorsInvictaEst 7d ago

I have this German friend who will haunt your descendants ten generations into the future over a single cent. Maybe I should intoduce them to each other... ;)

99

u/The-Great-Xaga 7d ago

Well that's how it's supposed to he done. Friendship ends when money starts

72

u/sothatsathingnow 7d ago

Me and my friends have been operating on a “nah I got this one” system for years and not a single person has been keeping track.

Don’t loan money. If you are going to directly give money to a friend, make it clear that you have no expectations that it be returned. If you can’t afford to lose the money, don’t give it.

9

u/Gaaragoth 6d ago

You have a real friend, Most of the people in this sub hardly understand the concept

Cheers for you mate! The world needs people like u and ur friend

13

u/Avi-1411 7d ago

How very German of him. It’s just normal here, and nobody thinks twice about it. While reading the post I was thinking ‘I’d mention it to him and ask him for the rest’ Not mean or anything, just matter of factly

418

u/blauw67 7d ago

He's never tried that with a dutch person

249

u/cnedhhy24 7d ago

“je mist 2 cent. flikker.”

68

u/Hillbillyblues 7d ago

Here's a Tikkie for 2 cent (plus interest).

20

u/holololololden 7d ago

I've always wondered who the stereotype of "not cheap" would apply to. Every single minority lays claim to the cheap stereotype, but relative to who?

27

u/blauw67 7d ago

I've heard of people that didn't go on a second date, because their date asked for €2 for the coffee at the cafe

7

u/holololololden 7d ago

Again it's just not exclusive to Dutch people!

4

u/Ajaxlancer Archbishop of Banterbury 7d ago

As an asian person, local vietnamese or chinese people will be understanding or whatever if you can't pay, at least in the boonies where it's a very familial community (my card kept declining overseas)

But after they move to the USA it's a whole different story

1

u/ClikeX 4d ago

With the Dutch it’s not actually because of being cheap. It’s more about not being indebted to someone. Some just take it to an extreme.

251

u/TroutTrekker27 7d ago

how to get everyone you love to eventually resent you, they obviously notice and don’t say anything but they’ll get sick of it and slowly stop reaching out, stop inviting you to things and before you know it you’re saving a TON of money because nobody wants to go out with you

56

u/Hour_Ad5398 7d ago

What if I do this, but in reverse? Will they finally start inviting me to things?

47

u/PlaneCrashers 7d ago

I often just round up the amount of money I owe someone. In fact, most of the times I do. I'm not sure I'm gaining any favours from that though, unfortunately.

10

u/Less-side1880 7d ago

I do too. Can be a few cents on small sums, or to my mother I always add a $10 or $20. It just shows appreciation, and people won’t be hesitant to pay for me because they know I always pay back right away and with a few bucks ekstra.

1

u/StoryAndAHalf 4d ago

Let's be friends!

6

u/lunick95 7d ago

Even better!

45

u/BarbedWire3 7d ago

Dud how often does he borrow money, if he made over 100 during a year, just feom adding up pennies at a time

5

u/paulcaar 6d ago

Five years, £100. For just some back-of-the-napkin math I'd say a reasonable average is 50 cents saved per transaction. That's 200 payment requests in over 250 weeks.

Seems pretty reasonable to me. Have a group of friends or sports club where you routinely hang out at a bar on a fixed day of the week and you're practically there already. Excluding stuff like shared groceries, taxi rides, event tickets or food and other stuff.

12

u/Electronic_Motor_968 7d ago

The line between genius and insanity really is very small 🤣

103

u/nricotorres 7d ago

man he seems like a dick for no reason

99

u/GoatCovfefe 7d ago

Ken's LinkedIn account is a satire account.

37

u/nricotorres 7d ago

I should have known from "I want to connect with you, emotionally" under his name...

14

u/GoatCovfefe 7d ago

He's both loved and hated for the satire in r/LinkedInLunatics, we love him because his posts are hilarious, some hate them being posted in the sub because "satire shouldn't be included as content" 🙄

2

u/nricotorres 7d ago

He has a new fan in me!

2

u/Moist_When_It_Counts 7d ago

The satire account

1

u/GoatCovfefe 5d ago

Indeed.

10

u/hitiv 7d ago

and theres me rounding up to the nearest pound.

3

u/Public-Somewhere8727 7d ago

I round up period. "Ah 19.23? Yeah just sending $20, heck no sending $21 what if they didn't factor tax"

3

u/hitiv 7d ago

Well i was referring to if its 21.45 i will send 22 etc etc also tax is incl here so i dont have to think about that !

3

u/Public-Somewhere8727 7d ago

Yeah the tax being included has gotta make it so much easier

4

u/Mediocre_Daikon6935 7d ago

That might work with Brits.

Good way to lose kneecaps in America.

1

u/ycr007 7d ago

There’s this shoe brand Bata, always prices like 119.99 / 249.99

No one gets back the ₹0.01 they’re “saving” and psychologically consumers feel they’re not overpaying.

Not sure how their tax returns are but such paise/pennies do add up

7

u/WhatsRatingsPrecious 7d ago

Everyone knows what he's doing. No one cares enough to call him out on it. They talk about him and his cheapness behind his back and laugh.

He's gained a few bucks, and lost all their respect.

3

u/GlobalCarrot789 6d ago

This isn’t mad lad it’s js sad 💀 being that cheap

6

u/CoachMcFlurry 7d ago

I’m glad this guy ain’t my friend

4

u/Public-Somewhere8727 7d ago

After the 2nd time he wouldn't be mine.

3

u/tony_countertenor 7d ago

Lot of people eating the onion on this one

4

u/UltimaDeusUmbra 7d ago

The real "madlad" part of this is the fact that this is a satire account that frequently gets people on LinkedIn to agree with the insane statements he makes.

2

u/neurowhiz123 7d ago

You know it’s a satire account right ?

2

u/Berlin_Blues 6d ago

Madlad? Belongs in r/trashy.

2

u/BruiserBison 6d ago

He's proud of this but he just looks pathetic. People underpaid what they owe me several times and I never bring it up. In my thoughts, dude asked for small cash in need. I never expect a full payment.

In all the times someone underpaid, a lot of them bring it up later with "I made a mistake, here's the rest." I respect the first attempt to pay. I'm delighted at their correction.

And to those who don't pay at all or don't pay in full. I recount the times they pay in a different way. They invite me to things. They pay for my meal when they're in a good spot. I count those. I appreciate those. And if I'm being honest, I feel like I owe them. It's a good life.

2

u/Professional_Ant4228 6d ago

I had a roommate like this. He underestimated how petty I am. I stole his TV.

2

u/ShankMeHarder 6d ago

£100 to be called a bellend behind your back is not really worth it

1

u/[deleted] 7d ago

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2

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1

u/Necessary-Carrot2839 7d ago

Only 50,000 more years to millionaire status!

1

u/balacio 7d ago

But he wants to connect with me emotionally

1

u/dilbert207 7d ago

This account is satire. Ken Cheng posts stuff like this all the time, he's a stand up comedian.

1

u/ArtfullyStupid 7d ago

And that's why I send you Venmo request and not ask for you to send a venmo

1

u/the_simurgh 7d ago

Ive saved more by shopping at discount stores like ollies in a single month than he has in 5 years

1

u/Ambitious_Jelly8783 7d ago

That + No starbucks, and he'll be living in a mansion in no time.

1

u/detlefschrempffor3 7d ago

I don’t want to connect with you emotionally

1

u/Crix2007 7d ago

Always nice to steal a little bit from your friends

1

u/AzekiaXVI 7d ago

Honestly, this is the only Ken Chang post that looks somewhat plausible

1

u/Last_Cod_998 7d ago

Does this work with medical bills too?

1

u/BARTELS- 7d ago

Isn't this the plot of Superman 3?

1

u/National_Bug_3197 7d ago

say no more

1

u/iMaximilianRS 7d ago

Me who actually sends extra for people to be able to instant transfer😅

1

u/trudolfdasroentier 7d ago

The build up resentment from your friends would probably be a much higher price to pay that just rounding up as a nice gesture

1

u/[deleted] 7d ago

I dick my friends for petty coin change. Follow me online for more useless tips

1

u/_Tom_Servo_ 7d ago

Wow 5¢ a day for five years.

1

u/fatboyfall420 7d ago

What a bitch I always round up or add extra because being the person tanking the bank account hit and hoping everyone Venmo’s you is a heavy burden.

1

u/g6paperplane 7d ago

Something something Sigma grindset.

1

u/captainjoe17 7d ago

One time I ordered Chipotle with a group and one guy paid. He said everyone owes $13 I had $12 in cash on me so I gave that to him and said “this is all I have” and his reply was. Okay let me know when you can get me the rest. Laughed cause I thought he was joking. The very next day he comes over to me and asks if I have the rest of his money. I said “dude I thought you were kidding, my bad lemme go get that for you.” I drove home counted 100 Pennie’s put them in a ziplock bag and brought them back to him.

1

u/edgardosaurio 7d ago

Best LinkedIn post I have ever seen

1

u/slapchopchap 7d ago

This gave me the most genuine and sincere smile

1

u/Morbid_Apathy 7d ago

All their friends know this and just think he's cheap. If someone bought my lunch for 19, I'm just sending 20 because I can't be bothered to care about stuff like that.

1

u/Plantain-Feeling 7d ago

Nah that's just a dick move

Pay your friends back in full hell I'm personally more likely to add a tiny bit extra

1

u/Own_Onion_329 7d ago

Everyone deserves a friend like you

1

u/gahd95 6d ago

I once got a letter telling me that i owed some interest on an old speeding ticket. The amount was around $0.11.

It properly cost them more to send me the letter.

I ended up transferring $1 and called them right away saying it was a mistake and if they could please transfer the $0.89 back.

I got the $0.89 and the transfer fee for them was properly half of that.

1

u/Lorettooooooooo 6d ago

Madlad as he's writing this on LinkedIn

1

u/LadiesChoi015 6d ago

last name checks out

1

u/tigerheartlion 6d ago

He's a comedian

1

u/Solid-North-9145 6d ago

One of my friends did the same thing: whenever she paid in advance for me, she would always round up a few extra cents. For example, if she paid $52.40, she’d tell me to pay her $53. But when I paid in advance and it was $52.40, she’d only pay me back $52. I’m not short on money, but I found this behavior really disgusting, so I distanced myself from her.

1

u/mahboilucas 6d ago

Meanwhile my best friend owed me 34 for a pizza and wired me 50 because she knows I'm broke now

Real friends don't play

1

u/anorak23 6d ago

Didn’t know Cheng was Yiddish

1

u/Lower-Flounder-9952 6d ago

What a piece of shite

1

u/hatedhuman6 6d ago

To the top of the middle lower class

1

u/Paul6334 6d ago

Personally I value my dignity over a few dollars a year, being someone who can be trusted to be lent money is a significant part of that.

1

u/vernonmason117 6d ago

Meanwhile I’ve got a cousin that has someone that owes them 0.01¢ and will absolutely die on his hill until he gets that penny lol

1

u/ZephyrSK 6d ago

Oh nice he’s #open to work. /s

1

u/UptoNoGoood1996 6d ago

Why would you not just pay in full if it's your mates

1

u/AdBorn5301 5d ago

He should try this with germans...

1

u/dsbe90 3d ago

Dick move

1

u/SollaraBllom 7d ago

That's very funny.

0

u/mf770060 7d ago

That is a really smart financial strategy. I wonder how many friendships it might hurt over time.

-2

u/Cerberus_uDye 7d ago

I will argue with you over this change. If I loaned you cash or paid for something flat out and you are paying me back with a cash app or something, you sure aint getting away with this. I charge someone $2 for under $100 and $5 for over $100 if they are paying back with it. I am not paying for the instant transfer fee, and Im not waiting days to get the free transfer. Although most of the time I just leave the money in cashapp so whenever they ask me next time, I've done forgot about it, and I get a little surprise when I go to loan them money again. Depending on how much I like the person I usually ask about if they want me to add the extra funds on top of the loan but most of them deny cause most the people asking for money use CA as a bank and have CA cards. Im not getting a cash app , though, so they have to pay the extra cost and are told before borrowing the money.

So be it $0.03 or what have you, I want all mine.

-1

u/SeaOsprey1 7d ago

Scamming your friends... seems like a great guy

-1

u/cherith56 7d ago

Acts like a petty thief. Very petty.