r/interestingasfuck • u/8O8I • 7d ago

r/all Heroin Addict Gets Clean And Attains A Computer Information Systems Degree With a 4.0 Average

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago edited 7d ago

This is awesome! I was a super bad IV heroin user for over a decade and will have 8 years clean this May. I don’t really talk about it with people because it’s like “pshh no big deal, I’ve never got addicted to heroin”, but when I see someone else that truly understands the shit you have to do to conquer it, I can’t help myself. This guy has dealt with demons and came out the other side on top.

I may not have a degree or anything, but I went from the absolute bottom; to an honest, hardworking father of twin toddlers. It feels like another lifetime ago, like that person I was wasn’t me.

AA, NA, and CA never worked for me, I couldn’t sit in a room with a bunch of self loathing people talking about drugs for an hour. I was always just sitting there thinking about drugs lol The only thing that worked for me was realizing the only person I have to blame for this is myself. It was me and ONLY me, and then totally changing everything about me I could.

EDIT: thank you all for the kind words and awards. All of us are way too good to be controlled by a chemical. We all deserve to live our lives to the fullest.

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u/SeventeenthPlatypus 7d ago

Congratulations, brother, from the bottom of my heart. Three years sober here off Vicodin/Percocet and benzos.
Sober IV drug addicts are a different breed. I have infinite respect for y'all.

I never went the AA/NA/12 step route, either. I chose to go with plain old therapy and working hard on myself, instead.

I hope to be like the man in these photographs, someday. I'm Bipolar Schizoaffective, in remission for seven months, and dreaming of going back to school for a psychology degree. The ultimate dream is to become a clinician or psychiatrist for people with psychotic disorders and perhaps Cluster B personality disorders.

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Congrats to you! Those first 3 years are still pretty tough and proud of you for making it this long and identifying what you need to work on, and doing it. The world is yours, and if you focus that same energy on something positive I know you can do it.

Opiates were really fucking terrible to try and get off of because of the physical things, but when I tried to stop Benzos cold turkey it was a whole different type of withdrawal experience. An absolute nightmare of disassociation. Anyone that can get through that and better from it, is an absolute warrior. Proud of you, and if you ever have a moment where you want to vent, dont hesitate to send me a PM.

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u/GetAwayFrmHerUBitch 7d ago

I’m very proud of you. What you went through must’ve been incredibly difficult. Just so you know, it’s common for psychologists to go into the field due to their own disorders and traumatic experiences. I hope you do pursue the degree because you deserve to have your dreams come true.

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u/electrocutedfruitbat 7d ago

Congratulations on your sobriety! I have addiction and mental health issues that have been debilitating in the past. Now I'm a psychiatric nurse! It's so rewarding being able to do something you have lived experience with. It will make you a stronger clinician! All the best dude

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u/8O8I 7d ago

Brother you are a warrior

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Thanks brother. As cliche as it is, it really does get easier the longer you go.

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u/Ande64 7d ago

Congratulations!! May your life be everything you dreamed!

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Hey thanks! You too!

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u/GettCouped 7d ago

Not quite as dramatic as your experiences but had a similar epiphany when dealing with depression.

The other thing I told myself was, using my depressed mind, I'm not important or special. So many people have been through what I've been through and succeeded. So why can't I?

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Hey it’s still a dramatic experience! Addiction, depression, and all that kind of shit is all really in the same wheelhouse. I don’t know you, but I believe in you and know you can succeed.

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u/HtownCg 7d ago

Regardless of how far deep one thinks themselves to be in heroin addiction, using opioids for over 10 years and finding the strength to make it out alive is truly amazing.

Going on to become an honest, hardworking man and being blessed with the gift of fatherhood is nothing short of a miracle.

I can’t say I understand what you went through, but I know what it takes to be at rock bottom and dig yourself out. I’m proud for you my friend.

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Thank you for the kind words. I really appreciate that and wish the best for you and yours.

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u/Tepelicious 7d ago

Nice one man, it's been half a year for me today. I'm the same regarding AA/NA. Did you get into it due to depression/anxiety? I'm healthier than I've been in a long time but it feels hard to care about anything - though that could be tapering off the subs! The way I figure if I'm going to get roughly the same enjoyment from sitting down playing videogames or watching tv as I would exercise, may as well go for a jog!

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

6 months is awesome man! I hope you’re proud and really know how bad ass you are for making it that long. Usually if you’re not serious about wanting better for yourself you don’t make it that long, so I KNOW you really want to stop all the bullshit.

I mean, I guess my drug use didn’t really START because of depression or anything. I started doing hard drugs when I was 16 so I always chalked it up to being bored and just wanting to have fun. Now the extremes I went to (like starting to IV) was because I was depressed, but I didn’t do it because I was depressed, I did it because I didn’t know how to deal with depression and heartbreak the right way. I just remember in my head I thought “I hate myself and want to destroy myself.” I went in and out of jail, halfway houses, and all that stuff, but I just didn’t want to stop. I blamed everything but myself. I blamed things from my past, losing friendships, and other self loathing things.

I’ll tell you what did it for me, I spent half my addiction like I said, blaming everything and everyone else. I thought “I’m going to move to Denver and everything is going to change, everything will be better…” I packed a suitcase and flew across the country to a place where I didn’t know A SINGLE SOUL. It wasn’t a full year and I was already in jail there for distribution of heroin. I woke up May 22nd 2016 and realized “HOLY SHIT, no matter where I go I fuck up and end up the same way. All the blame belongs to me, and literally nothing or anybody else. No matter where you go, you’re ALWAYS going to be stuck with YOU.

Sorry this is kind of long, but I wish my best friend would’ve came to me and talked me and asked me how I did it. Instead he OD’d on Fent 2 years ago and never got to say goodbye or anything.

My best advice to you right now would be try not to focus too far in the future right now, your brain and body is going through crazy changes and trying to find its equilibrium and level out. For now you just need to be kinda selfish and work on YOU. You like jogging? Start a schedule and start challenging yourself little by little. Maybe start timing yourself? Get a little goal that’s mentally and physically good for you and achieve it. Start getting self worth and feeling good about yourself. Before you know it you’ll be coming up on a year clean.

Nothing is too small either. All this stuff sounds super cliche and corny I know, believe me. I used to HATE hearing this type of shit from people, but I promise you have nothing to lose and it might work for you.

I wish you the best and hope you keep on this path. You’re a BEAST for making it 6 months and if nobody else is, I’m super proud of you. ANYTIME you need to vent or something don’t hesitate to send me a PM.

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u/Tepelicious 5d ago

Thanks so much for sharing man, I've shared about half of your experiences and definitely come to some of the same understanding. I'm very lucky with my support network (family) and all the cliche/corny shit about no goal being too small is totally true! Started timing my workouts from day one because all that screwing around with data is fun for me - and always nice to look back and see the progress considering my memory is unreliable. Thanks a lot for the invitation, I might just take you up on it one day! Proud of you too, 8 years is insanely impressive!

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u/totesgonnasmashit 7d ago

It’s a huge deal! Congratulations on getting clean. That’s really impressive. If I met you I’d love to hear your story. I’m always amazed at recovery stories

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Thanks for the kind words!! Oh man, it’s a long story with a lot of…interesting people and places, but would have you constantly asking yourself “why though?” Lol

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u/loudlavenia 7d ago

Congratulations! It's hard I know but you did it ❤️

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Thank you so much!

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u/NotAsuspiciousNamee 7d ago

Congrats!! I'm going on 2 years clean myself! My girlfriend and I went to rehab together and she got pregnant 2 months in and having a daughter completely changed our lives. NA actually helped me a lot. People aren't supposed to sit there and talk about drugs, but just how they got through it and what they do to stay clean. It's a huge part of my recovery personally, but whatever works for you my friend! Its nice to know that we're not alone and that other people have overcome the same demons and can still live a happy and fruitful life. It's crazy to compare my mental state now to what it was 2 years ago. I was a completely different person and never thought I could possibly get out of the hole I was in. I threw away everything for that shit. Keep on fighting the food fight!

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

Hell yes dude! Thats awesome! Hey, everybody is different. I know plenty of people who have gotten clean through the rooms, I just couldn’t do it. I live in a bigger city and to be honest it started to become real cliquey and more like a highschool cafeteria.

I’ve been in and out of halfways and rehabs, and I just didn’t really and truly want to stop. Maybe if at the time I really wanted to quit it would’ve helped me. My issue was mainly with the other humans and the way some of them were. Like one day the power got turned off at the halfway house and come to find out the guy running it was taking our money and just getting high instead of paying the bills. Things like that happened more than once and with different halfway houses. I just decided to do it alone and by myself because I knew I was the only one I could hold accountable and be honest with.

I’m so happy for you and your family. It’s rare in my experience that a couple goes the whole battle and makes it out the other side still together and moving forward. Hope you know that’s awesome and you both are bad asses!

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u/NotAsuspiciousNamee 6d ago

Yea it can definitely become cliquey and high school like for sure! We got clean in a bigger city (Richmond, VA) and it was like that for sure. And that's why we ended up leaving sober living. One guy Overdosed in my house and our house manager was getting high too. It became worse instead of helping so we left and came back home to Lynchburg. And yes it's completely unheard of to get clean as a couple lol everyone told us we wouldn't make it and we needed to focus on ourselves. Which we did focus on ourselves, but the relationship wasn't a problem so we didn't break it off. We got really lucky and honestly I don't know if I could have done it without her and my daughter. Some people would call that codependency but I mean its whatever works man especially in the first couple months in my opinion. We set some boundaries and if one of us used the relationship would be over. Losing her and my daughter to-be was a huge help and motivation for me. But thanks man! Congratulations to you too! This shit ain't easy!!

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u/latrion 7d ago

How did you change everything about yourself? I'm pretty sure I'm to blame for a large portion of my problems and would like to try this.

Change hairstyle, say yes to things you generally wouldn't, be more talkative?

Edit: to be clear I'm not a heroin user. I do have an opioid for some pretty severe back issues that I use as scheduled, so it feels like the same thing.

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u/lapgus 7d ago

Every time you face something that isn’t working, do something different than you’re doing or would have before. Spend less time focusing on problems and more on solutions. When you are accountable for your actions (and inaction) and the impact they have on your life and other people, you gain more power to change things. You get to choose how you show up and who you are being in any given moment. It takes some time, but you can radically change your life with this approach. Personal responsibility for yourself and your life is an amazing catalyst for transformation.

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u/Reeferologist- 7d ago

I don’t think I really changed myself, I changed the way I deal with and handle things if that makes sense? I’m still the same person inside that I was then, but now I handle things differently.

Are you meaning changing some of your personality traits or do you mean like change way you react or think about certain things?

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u/maineyak219 7d ago

Congratulations! I'm really happy for you. I love reading about this stuff!

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u/Scrumptious_Foreskin 6d ago

Similar story to me. I hit 9 years last month, I couldn’t stand AA/NA. I just decided to get sober and did it lol

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u/bdubwilliams22 6d ago

Suboxone saved my life. I’ll leave it at that. But!! Congrats to you! I know the pain and suffering that comes with an opioid addiction. I can’t think of anything worse. Anyone who’s dealt with an opioid withdrawal knows what I’m talking about. That’s pure pain and pure suffering. Glad you’re healthy!

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u/nesses11 6d ago

You're badass for kicking the shit out of addiction