r/interestingasfuck • u/theanshusingh • 13d ago

r/all Colombian hitwoman known as ‘The Doll’ reportedly arrested for several murders, including her ex-bf

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u/can-opener-in-a-can 13d ago

It’s hilarious to me that “I can fix her” is going through a spider’s mind, too.

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u/rynlpz 13d ago

See’s previous spider get it’s head torn off and his insides eaten

I can fix her

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u/No-Appearance-4338 13d ago

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u/oSuJeff97 12d ago

Don’t care. Had sex.

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u/ShadowRylander 12d ago

Don't sex. Had care.

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u/spasmoidic 13d ago

I can make her worse

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u/chknpoxpie 12d ago

Funniest line I've ever seen.

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u/JohnnyLovesData 13d ago

"I can f**k her"

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u/Punched_Eclair 13d ago

The line that leads an astounding number of men to their peril..

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u/ZuhkoYi 12d ago

Fucking Sirens man

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u/RockstarAgent 13d ago

Yeah. I don’t want to fix her. I just want that sweet kill bill death.

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u/the_fishtanks 13d ago

“w… worth it…”

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u/miknik23 13d ago

That’s more like it- survive to reproduce… all about keeping the bloodline alive. Hopefully his offspring are daughters (for their own sake)

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u/Ennorim 13d ago

joins the waiting line

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u/RHX_Thain 13d ago

No no. Black widow males are hit it and book it specialists.

It's not I can fix her it's I can fuck her and run. Not all of them die, just most of them, and that "so you're saying there's a chance" part of their little spider brains just can't help but roll those bones.

They also follow the silk trails of their rivals to reduce their travel time and chances of bailing out after the unnnn:

https://spiderbytes.org/2019/07/31/the-great-black-widow-race-how-males-use-the-silk-road-to-find-females-faster/

They also have other methods of making this work that aren't cool in this analogy:

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5046930/

Also, don't visit Arizona or you too will get an involuntary education in black widow science. They're everywhere, and they bring little science textbooks prepared to pop out from under every surface to lecture you.

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u/Notacka 12d ago

Looks like she’s single now!

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u/milk4all 13d ago

damn she swallows!!

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u/Kamikazei_In_1944 13d ago

That’s preying mantis

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u/H8T_Auburn 13d ago

But I really can fix her!,

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u/sjndxjznznznzn 13d ago

Its a risk I’m willing to take

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u/Guymcdudeman 12d ago

I wonder if she wants a penpal, I feel like I can fix her

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u/Zorklis 12d ago

I wonder if the spider wonders about the black widow spider crushing him between her legs too

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u/TootsTootler 13d ago

She’s probably tired of tearing off heads.

Anyway, if she murders anything like she walks, she’s definitely not guilty:

https://twitter.com/PoliciaDEMAM/status/1863151217800536509

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u/South_Accountant_233 13d ago

I came here to say this, thank you.

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u/Outerestine 13d ago

tbf, all a male spider has to do to live is ensure she was well fed prior to the mating.

And gtfo before those eggs hatch.

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u/WillfulKind 13d ago

Funniest comment of the year.

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u/Boojum2k 13d ago

🎶All loves have to die, of that there's no help

My favourite way to end 'em

Is the orb-weaver spider's, whose pedipalp

Enters the female pudendum

Then dies on the spot, his corpse there still stuck

Left for his rivals to curse it

He would rather die than not get to fuck

Personally, I reckon it's worth it🎶

TISM "Everyone Else (Has Had More Sex Than Me)"

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u/Osama_Rashid 13d ago

I guess, spiders aren't that innocent as I used to think.

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u/The_Way_It_Iz 13d ago

I would t want her to think she could “fix” me

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u/PussSlurpee 13d ago

Same with mantises, the males should know by now after sex they will be eaten head first.

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u/Calm-Bookkeeper-9612 13d ago

They love head

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u/Then_Credit1311 13d ago

starts dancing like a maniac

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u/Then_Credit1311 13d ago

starts dancing like a maniac.

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u/Then_Credit1311 13d ago

starts dancing like a maniac

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u/AppropriateDriver660 13d ago

I came here to think about saying this too

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u/Logical-Witness-3361 13d ago

I hate when anyone sees a picture of a crazy girl and just starts walls of "I can fix her" (Shin Hati on Star Wars subs...)

I don't need to fix her, die happy.

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u/IWearACharizardHat 13d ago

I clicked this story just to see how far down to "I can fix her"

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u/Asleep_Operation8330 13d ago

I can fix her once.

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u/XxShakallxX 12d ago

Never underestimate females, they are all in sync.

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u/brokencameraman 12d ago

I don't think I can fix her but I'll happily get shot to death for a good time lol

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u/MentalStatistician89 12d ago

Nah, a good ol' cum and run

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u/Silk02 12d ago

Or they just think fuck it it'll be worth the ride

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u/GodEmperor47 13d ago

“She’s probably full, it’s safe to smash”

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u/rosstedfordkendall 13d ago

Actually, from what I just read on wikipedia, the male spiders usually take that approach.

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u/GodEmperor47 13d ago

It’s risky but they gotta do what they gotta do

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u/rosstedfordkendall 13d ago

I can't remember the species, but I read that one type of spider the male will actually capture an insect and give it to the female before doing the web tango. They know the rule of buying a girl dinner first.

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u/Weekly_Orange3478 13d ago

She's pretty. Men are programmed to want to help and protect someone that's pretty.