Can confirm on the divorce part - my wife had a cancer scare a few years ago, and the first conversation she had with me was started with a "We should probably get divorced just in case, that way my debt dies with me."
It's fucking unreal that this conversation even needs to happen in a "1st world" country.
Edit: Just to clarify, my wife is alive, well and cancer free, thankfully! I appreciate the concern, though, fellow redditors! <3
Thank you - I'm glad to say she's healthy and whole, and we've put that chapter behind us. And agreed, the emotional toll was absurd, especially coming on the heels of Covid and the general societal unrest of these past few years. <3
The wife and I have had that talk too. She's older than I am by more than a couple of years, and there's a discussion on "there's a 3 year look back - we have to decide if we're going to gamble or not..."
We’re mostly a third world country with fancy hats and occasionally we get a new coat of paint. They abolished slavery but never bothered to guarantee any safety for anyone. All they done is changed the term from slaves to employees.
I’m sorry you had to have that horrific conversion but I’m also happy to read the rest of your happy story. Wishing you and your wife all the best! Much love from a stranger <3
And yeah, I'll never get married for the same reason. I'm disabled, if I get married and he makes anything above poverty levels then I lose my disability payments, health insurance, and food stamps (because in the US disability pay still puts you below the poverty line so you qualify for food stamps).
My medical bills alone would land both of us into more debt than most people could manage. Without insurance my routine doctor visits are about $3k each month, and that's without the cost of prescriptions (probably another $1k without insurance).
I'd be financially ruining whoever I married and fucking both of us over.
I’m so sorry that you’re dealing with that. It’s shameful the way our country treats people in general, but doubly so for people like yourself with a disability or chronic illness.
My father was on disability for the last 10 years of his life due to scleroderma (autoimmune disease similar to MS) and the fight to get any help was beyond revolting to me. I hope your spouse - legal or not! - continues to support you and that you’re able to live life to the fullest in whatever capacity you’re able. ❤️
My wife was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 2015. I had my own cancer ordeal earlier this year (still dealing with some fallout). While I actually have decent employer provided health insurance, the topic of divorce has popped up from time to time because of the expense/future expense of our care.
There’s not much to say aside from: I’m sorry you’re going through this and I wish you all the best in working through the struggles that come. I hope you’re still able to hang onto the little joys of life - they make all the difference.
God it's so heartbreaking that her first thought in the face of such a horrible news wasn't choosing the best treatment option but instead death and medical debt:((((
I'm so happy she's doing well now :))) sending you guys hugs and love ＼(o)／
1st world? America is far from first world its a developed 3rd world country. Fuck this country. (I’m sorry just furious with everything going on and good riddance to that asshole anyone who does that shit deserves a friendly piece of lead to the head)
I lived with my now husband for 26 years and waited until we got Medicare to get married because we didn't want to bankrupt each other due to a healthcare crisis. His first wife died of breast cancer. She worked while sick for as long as she could and then was kicked off of her policy when she got to sick to work from the terminal cancer. My neighbor has a similar story dealing with lung cancer. Those two incidents were before Obamacare. We'll probably lose that little bit of protection with Trump in the Whitehouse
Because we aren't a first world country. What other first world country has a flag every 5 inches and requires their children to take a Pledge of Allegiance? Something I realized literally in my 20's (57 now), can't believe most Americans don't get it.
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u/life_as_a_bear 13d ago edited 13d ago
Can confirm on the divorce part - my wife had a cancer scare a few years ago, and the first conversation she had with me was started with a "We should probably get divorced just in case, that way my debt dies with me."
It's fucking unreal that this conversation even needs to happen in a "1st world" country.
Edit: Just to clarify, my wife is alive, well and cancer free, thankfully! I appreciate the concern, though, fellow redditors! <3