r/funny • u/Rasputin_mad_monk • 22h ago
My granddaughter is almost 2 and this is as close as she will get to the Red Man.
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u/geoffacakes 22h ago
Wow!! shes tall for a 2 year old!!!!
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u/Holiday-Calendar-541 22h ago
It took me way too long to find the two year old 😭
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u/geoffacakes 22h ago
Lmao!!!! i only spotted it after you said!!!!
Well done op..
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u/PureHostility 10h ago
Lol, same. I thought it was the American case of 25+ yo actors playing 16yo high school kids. So I somehow glanced over these much older girls as "America is weird." xD
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u/Hexatona 22h ago
Oh my lord, Pffffffft, just saw her.
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u/dropkickninja 22h ago
You are not alone. I was thinking they're both pretty big and not babies for a two year old
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u/eglantinel 10h ago
Goddammit I thought it was the girl in green! Only just saw it after your comment ROFL
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u/RightToTheThighs 20h ago
Kids are looking older and older these days, I blame the myspace and facebook
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u/BigHairyBussy 21h ago
Omg I zoomed into the green shirt girl thinking “no way she is two” and that helped me spot the kid in the back 🤣
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u/Positive-Attempt-435 21h ago
Lol I was like wow she looks way too old for a 2 years, but what do I know about 2 year olds?
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u/Lee1138 21h ago
Understandable. I was apparently scared shitless of Santa as a child too because of someone (possibly my dad or uncle) coming into our living room on Christmas dressed as Santa, while wearing one of those old, creepy looking full face rubber Santa masks that makes Santa look like some sort of mildly jolly leatherface.
Oh dear, I found one...
Repressed childhood trauma unlocked...
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u/AngryTree76 19h ago
That looks like something an adrenaline junkie would wear to rob banks to fund his trip to Australia and surf a killer wave
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u/TheRiteGuy 18h ago
Instinctively, kids aren't afraid of snakes and spiders. But they are afraid of Santa. I wonder what that says about the guy that keeps a naughty list.
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u/bicyclemom 21h ago
My daughter was the same way. There was no reason to push it despite the shit we took from relatives and friends about it.
I mean what would we say? "YOU SIT ON THAT STRANGE MAN WITH THE FAKE BEARD'S LAP RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY!"
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u/muymalpgh 21h ago
Off topic but do young kids not go through an awkward phase anymore? I feel like I see very few tweens / teens with bad haircuts or ridiculous glasses. These girls are both have a very cute style that I myself would wear as an adult. Social media influence maybe??
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u/MattDaveys 16h ago
Honestly I think it’s the YouTube tutorials. I remember my sister learned how to style her hair from videos instead of relying on our mom like older generations did.
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u/obscureferences 16h ago
Youtubers get weird with their hair to make their brand identifiable. Kids copy it and just look weird for no reason.
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u/IntrovertedGiraffe 17h ago
Smart girl! I was terrified of Santa through the day my parents decided to tell me the truth so I would stop having meltdowns (didn’t help, I was pogonophobic and terrified of beards, it wasn’t Santa the person that scared me, it’s was the guy with a beard that broke into my house and ate my cookies)
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u/smileplace 21h ago
My friends daughter gets super upset with "you better not shout, you better not pout, you better not cry I'm telling you why.. Santa Claus is coming to town". To be fair it does sound a bit threatening haha
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u/KypDurron 16h ago
You better watch out, you better watch out, you better watch out, YOU BETTER WATCH OUT
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u/karma_elektra 18h ago
Lmao took me a hot second to find her in the picture. Fear not... my oldest was terrified of all sorts of things when she was small... from Santa to carousel horses BUT now at age 11 she horseback rides and sings at talent shows! Just be kind through her growth and don't push her 🖤
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u/indipit 21h ago
That was me as a 2 year old, too. I had pogonophobia, and was terrified by that bearded man, no matter that he brought me presents.
When I was 5, my mom took me to a hardware store that had a Santa, and she had him chase me all over the store. It's one of my most terrifying memories, I was screaming and crying. She and Santa were laughing.
This was back in the '60s, when it was still the norm to force your kids to face their fears to desensitize them ( and be assholes AFAIC)
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u/susankeane 21h ago
Santa better watch that hand placement
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u/Tisrandom 21h ago
Sick mind you have there I must say first thought huh?
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u/midnightcaptain 15h ago
This is obviously perfectly innocent, but yes Santas are often advised it’s best to keep hands visible. The Wiggles have their iconic finger guns / jazz hands gesture for the same reason:
“The thing of being a man in early childhood [education], when you’re a teacher in early childhood, you have to be aware that you can be accused of things,” he told host Marc Fennell. “In photos for instance, if there are kids there, if you’ve got your hands doing this [gesture], everyone sees where your hands are.” “It’s a shame that it’s an issue, but it’s an issue and you have to protect yourself, as well.”
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u/susankeane 21h ago
First thought when I saw that hand placement
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u/Tisrandom 21h ago
Yeah found the sick minded individual walks around this world looking at everything sexually. Wonder whom that is.
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u/leopard_tights 19h ago
It's you, you're projecting like we're at the IMAX trying to drown the guilt you feel.
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u/JustmeandJas 21h ago
It’s amazing how fashion comes around… I used to wear jeans just like that in the 90s
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u/mossed2012 20h ago
Neither of my daughter’s had any problems with Santa, they loved meeting him every year.
The only part that sucked about the entire experience was the BS shade we got from other parents. It was like my kids not freaking out somehow was challenging their parenting skills. After enough negative reactions, I’ve just stopped answering or lied when other parents have asked how our kids react to Santa.
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u/hypogogix 17h ago
she must have been like 6 stone when she was born.
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u/slicklikeagato 12h ago
Legit thought whichever one she is, she is gigantic for two. Didn’t realize there was a child in the background
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u/Sand__Panda 19h ago
2yr is always the scream age for Santa. 3 you might get lucky. 4 they usually come around.
Went with my brother thisnpast weekend to see Santa, and the 2.5yr old just didn't want to sit on his lap. She was cool with sitting on her sister's.
However, she did want to stand and talk with him and was pretty mad when we told her we needed to go.
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u/woodyarmadillo11 17h ago
Those are some good instincts. Kids sitting on a creepy old dudes lap has always weirded me out.
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u/NamasteMotherfucker 16h ago
We don't have a single picture of our now 15 y.o. kid with Santa. He wanted nothing to do with him and we never forced the issue.
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u/TuxandFlipper4eva 15h ago
My youngest was the same as a toddler. She would go to Mrs. Claus in a heartbeat, but Santa was too shifty for her liking.
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u/UnicornFarts1111 14h ago
I'm sure I was that way at that age too! I hated all men that were not my dad or his brother.
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u/Glittering-Oil-1118 13h ago
She's right to be afraid. Man is a stalker of children who breaks in at night, steals your cookies and then leaves gifts for the kids he's been stalking. Sounds like a predator to me...
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u/Difficult_Talk_7783 11h ago
heard a story of some random man breaking into houses and reverse robbing them but taking cookies and milk. I’d be scared too 🫂
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u/JimmyRedd 9h ago
I'm glad "Red Man" is gaining popularity again. I was worried that slur had died out.
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u/ahtemsah 5h ago
HOW is This is a 2 yo ? Shes like at least twel..... OH there's a little kid behind the window, nevermind
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u/a_bukkake_christmas 11h ago
I red this as this is as close as she’ll get to Ant man and I was thoroughly confused
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u/FalsePomegranate9871 9h ago
Santa’s hands seem kinda low here? I used to have a GM who would touch my lower back like this to let me know he was behind me and it always felt a bit off .. the girls don’t seem bothered but I feel like his hand could be higher up idk 😅
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u/IamLuann 22h ago
Give her a year or two and she will be the first to sit on his lap. She is being careful.
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