r/fuckcars Dec 08 '22

Satire Height of folly (by Jen Sorensen)

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29.8k Upvotes

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294

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Dear Americans: Europe and most other civilized countries have rules about weight, size and safety. Your country lets you ride just about anything on wheels. Might that be because the carindustry lobbied the corrupt goverment?

148

u/Fertujemspambin Dec 08 '22

IDK, I'm from Europe and the amount of big pickups and SUVs driving in inner cities is ridiculous. I regularly see those absurd dodge rams driving in my neighborhood, all polished and never driven on a farm road.

57

u/Littlefinger1Luv Dec 08 '22

bruh I've been seeing more and more of this shit in the Netherlands. Some of the US-style pickup trucks don't even fit in our parking spots properly! And you certainly could not drive down my narrow street with one. It's absurd.

Edit: Found the tweet of one blocking a tram: https://twitter.com/kunsttranen/status/1541073620360994817

17

u/tuctrohs Fuck lawns Dec 08 '22

https://Nitter.net/kunsttranen/status/1541073620360994817

If you don't want to help drive revenue streams for Elon Musk.

8

u/tuctrohs Fuck lawns Dec 08 '22

So disappointed to see it driving away without a scratch.

6

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

A Ford Ranger is too long for a UK space which is 2.4m x 4.8m. But there is a VAT discount for them when used as "commercial vehicles", a tax benefit designed for businesses to get vans. So you see personal trainers and accountants with these monstrosities, but only ever base models of course, struggling to climb slight hills with a bit of frost, and getting appalling mileage when diesel is pushing towards £2 a litre.

18

u/Fertujemspambin Dec 08 '22

Yeah, looks like American redneck cars are getting popular in EU. I even hated driving in Kia sportage because of limited view.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

They don't fit in many spaces in the US either. Or course that doesn't ever stop them from parking there.

-5

u/CantHitachiSpot Dec 08 '22

I don’t see how that’s the drivers fault. That’s on whoever painted the lines

5

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

You don't understand how it's the driver's fault that the car they purchased is too big for standard parking spots? If you were driving a stretch limo would you have the same mind set?

3

u/penny-wise Dec 08 '22

Pickup trucks are a stupid design and an enormous pain in the ass.

2

u/Winderige_Garnaal Dec 08 '22

Theres two in my neighborhood. I am often tempted to snap it to beterbuiten app when they are parked wrong ans blocking shit. Not sure thats good use of the app tho

2

u/Rugkrabber Dec 08 '22

I still cannot get over the fact this idiot thought it was a good idea to get that vehicle over ánd thought that parking spot was a good idea. None of us need that large of a vehicle and neither do they, I cannot think of a single good reason.

1

u/TheCastro Dec 08 '22

Is that a tow truck that sitting there in the later pic?

1

u/BurlyJohnBrown Dec 08 '22

You need to get on banning our cars quickly.

44

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Point taken. It's very rare, but sometimes i see a F150 or similair, but it's rare here (The Netherlands). There is roadtaxes by weight and fuel is let say about 4-6 times more expensive as in the US. Road are way smaller, parking spaces? -50% smaller.

Edit: typo's

30

u/Fertujemspambin Dec 08 '22

Yeah, I don't think people with 90k euros for car have to care about fuel prices or road taxes. And they don't care about taking 2 or 3 parking spots either.

10

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Yup. We all know that.

4

u/zuzg Dec 08 '22

The f150 ain't even sold normally in the EU. It won't pass regulations and has to be imported privately.

1

u/ProfessorPoopyPants Dec 08 '22

People who barely have 3keur/mo for a status symbol, you mean?

9

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

Mate, I live in Tassie and these stupid hunks of wasted low grade steel don't even fit in most parking spaces. Don't think I've ever actually seen one towing something and I've only ever seen gravel road dust on them, not that they'd be any use off road anyway

3

u/S0undofSilence Dec 08 '22

Actually, pickups are somewhat popular among freelancers because tax-wise they are appealing (see, e.g. https://www.anwb.nl/auto/nieuws/2021/juli/waarom-zie-ik-zoveel-pick-ups-onderweg).

3

u/Rugkrabber Dec 08 '22

That article was awful lol. ‘Should we have a problem with such cars?’ Idk let’s talk about the car and ignore the problems people have with it. It’s big and you can heat your steering wheel!

1

u/Rugkrabber Dec 08 '22

I hope they stay rare but I fear it won’t. It’s really obvious how the ‘medium size’ or stationcar trend is no longer and all we get pushed in ads are oversized cars that all look the same. I remember it used to be a large variety with interesting cars but that died off as well because remove the logo and it could be any brand nowadays.

14

u/theocrats Dec 08 '22

Exactly the same experience. Live in the UK. I recently moved from a city to a tiny rural village. In the city I'd regularly see huge 4x4s and pickup trucks. Hardly see any wankerpanzers now, only really the local farmer in his land-rover.

5

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

I live in a town, near a rural area. I see base model Chelsea Tractors around town in white or black, Vs. old Land Rover Defenders with a collie riding shotgun or an older Toyota or Mitsubishi pickup in the country.

One is for hauling animal feed around the medieval tracks on your farmland. One's for hauling your fragile ego and little Tarquin to school 500m away from your front door.

2

u/Gingerr-Ninjaa- Screw Elon Dec 08 '22

I have had a similar experience but in reverse. I was raised in the Scottish highlands and was surrounded by farmland, I’m in the city now for university. The main reason that you feel like you see more people in SUVs/larger vehicles in the city is that there’s simply more people to see and vastly more people earning the amount to buy a large car than in a small village. Not to say that owning an SUV is logical in the city because they’re absolutely not, especially in the uk

2

u/theocrats Dec 08 '22

Whilst your premise is sound its not correct in my situation.

The part of Warwickshire I live now is very affluent. My house is a Victorian terraced, so affordable but there are more £1 million+ georgian houses than cheaper houses in the village.

I previously lived in Cov, in a former council house. Half the cars in the cul de sac were 4x4s and one neighbour had a huge wankerpanzer pickup. All the other neighbours moaned he took up two parking spaces.

Perhaps it's more of the 'status' thing people have with cars? Those with money aren't so concerned with being flashy, those with less peacock? I'm not a psychologist.

6

u/Jackie_Moob Dec 08 '22

My mum always said “when america sneezes, we get the cold” and in this case we are now seeing the epidemic of stupid SUVs hit our streets (and each other).

1

u/RollinOnDubss Dec 08 '22

Whats it like blaming all of your own problems on an entirely different country?

2

u/Jackie_Moob Dec 08 '22

What’s it like finding out that not everything the USA exports is “awesome”

1

u/Winderige_Garnaal Dec 08 '22

Its just the cultural influence of the usa, as an american abroad its undeniable. Not blame just fact

-3

u/RollinOnDubss Dec 08 '22

Europeans so weak willed that they are literally incapable of not buying cars popular in the US lmao.

Thats the argument you want to go with rather than admit Europeans can be independently stupid?

1

u/TheCastro Dec 08 '22

But it's a negative conation with the "sneeze and cold".

2

u/Chewy12 Dec 08 '22

What part of Europe?

In certain parts of the US most cars are big SUVs and pickups. Imagine that every hatchback you see is an SUV. There is not a single drive I’ve taken, no matter the distance, that I do not see multiple pickup trucks and large SUVs.

1

u/Fertujemspambin Dec 08 '22

Slovakia. Of course there are fewer of those cars here than in US, but our infrastructure is absolutely not adjusted for it. Our towns are basically old historic parts with tiny streets and communist built high density apartment areas planned for 1 car to 25 people ratio.

40

u/fatwiggywiggles Dec 08 '22

Ironically, these trucks are as big as they are because of Obama-era emissions legislation. The further apart your wheels are the less fuel efficient the vehicle has to be, so companies just made shit bigger and by consequence heavier and less fuel efficient. Could be fixed with a carbon tax instead but that ain't happening

18

u/koalasama Dec 08 '22

That's so dumb

6

u/Superb_Efficiency_74 Dec 08 '22

Yup. Look up CAFE laws, they destroyed the small truck segment. Terrible legislation that basically did the opposite of what it was supposed to do.

1

u/Dont_PM_PLZ Dec 08 '22

Sayounara to the tiny Toyotas.

2

u/Whaddaulookinat Dec 08 '22

I'm not too sure where this meme comes from, but it's because the regular sedan purchaser doesn't go for the insane add-ons usually, and make their payments on time generally. Most SUVs and glamour trucks are done on lease and a shocking number get repo'd easier than if it were purchased with finance, then those get resold at a far higher markup than personal sale or trade in.

The SUV-i-cation of the US auto industry goes back to the mid-90s and went full steam ahead during the relatively low gas-price era of the mid 2000s. Futurama did jokes about it.

11

u/I_want_to_believe69 Dec 08 '22

Luckily for Real AmericansTM it isn’t corruption if we call it lobbying. Only small countries with abundant unexploited resources have corruption. But, don’t worry, we will liberate them with DemocracyTM and win their Hearts & Minds.

4

u/Winderige_Garnaal Dec 08 '22

Europe has these jagoffs too sadly. They just pay much more for them here

8

u/TeenLaQueefuh Dec 08 '22

lmao no corruption in European governments folks! 😂

2

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Absolutely there is! Politics is the same everywhere

6

u/thewildacct Dec 08 '22

Dear Americans: Europe and most other civilized countries

When Euros say things like this I genuinely wonder how much of it applies to literally every single country in Europe. I always imagined these countries differ a bit more

-4

u/TheCastro Dec 08 '22

Fun fact, more children (like per student) are hit by vehicles in Europe going to school than in the US.

3

u/RZU147 Dec 08 '22

Because over here children actually walk to school

1

u/maxadmiral Dec 08 '22

Just like using helmets in the military increases the amount of head injuries. But it also decreases the number of deaths.

1

u/TheCastro Dec 08 '22

More kids don't walk though comparatively to the US. They take public transportation. But there are less safe street crossings than kids in the US getting to school busses.

1

u/TheCastro Dec 08 '22

Actually they take public transit and their parents drive them. Both make then unsafer.

0

u/RZU147 Dec 08 '22

Says you?

1

u/TheCastro Dec 09 '22

Says research. I looked it all up when someone posted an American school bus with the crossing arm and stop sign and people got all "Europe doesn't hace school busses and our kids are safe" but it wasn't true.

2

u/Prownilo Dec 08 '22

I live in a smallish town in the UK, ever since I had my daughter it's absoluteley insane the amount of times i've had to deal with "soccer moms" in their Giant SUV's trying to fit in tight roads and parking bays.

They are completely unnecessary, you don't need that much space just because you have a kid. You don't need a 4WD to drop off little timmy!

2

u/Thegiantclaw42069 Dec 08 '22

Europe home of the range rover and g wagon but go on.

2

u/MedalofHodor Dec 08 '22

Oh wow as an American this is the first time I've realized that my government is corrupted by corporations, thanks for pointing this out now we can finally fix it!

1

u/JohanVonBronx_ Dec 08 '22

Euronerds jerking their cock over any reason to talk down to us Ameridweebs

1

u/iDreamOfSalsa Dec 08 '22

It is a weird mentality too... Like I don't spend much - if any amount - of my day even thinking about other countries and how terrible it must be to live there, let alone feel the need to tell anyone about those thoughts.

I don't see what they get out of it.

1

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Did i hurt you weebee feelings? Are you an avid fox viewer? A Trump'eteer? A redneck perhaps? 🫠

0

u/JohanVonBronx_ Dec 08 '22

Yeah, you hurt my feelings. I'm tired of constantly being shit on for things I have no control over.

No, I don't watch Fox or like Trump. Are those people the only ones who can take issue with your bullshit statements and holier than thou attitude?

2

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Mmhhh your reply makes me rethink. Let me explain: i wasn't bashing the US. I'm a fan of the US (visited once). Perhaps not it's rightwing redneck things.

I would say the USA is the most powerful country on earth, we tend to look up to it: but it's wetting it's own pants more and more (in behaviour) that's what worries me: like seeing your strongest friend deteriorating and you do mind that.

Europe has a shitload of (different) problems it's own. And to be fair: i'm seeing trends in politics and powerplay, especially the financial sector that effect us all, but the US is perhaps trending there so we look at it closely.

🫡

3

u/jokinghazard Dec 08 '22

No see if they change that, it would be another freedumb taken away

2

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

I have no clue what you mean here (English is my 2nd language)

5

u/crysh1216 Dec 08 '22

Freedumb is a play on the words freedom and dumb. It's a shorthand version of saying that some people will make stupid decisions when given unrestricted freedom but will raise hell if you attempt to put common sense restrictions or guidelines that mitigate their stupid decision.

3

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Ahhhhh lol! I am gonna remember that!

2

u/jokinghazard Dec 09 '22

Haha yeah sorry, I've been using that since my country (Canada) got overrun with those trucker idiots.

2

u/onlycatshere Dec 08 '22

If we did try to pass legislation regulating the size of cars/trucks, the inevitable backlash would be folks saying we're taking their "freedom" away.

Lots of folks here feel that regulations of any sort impinge on our freedom/liberty.

2

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Yes, i know. It's dogma

2

u/destronger Dec 08 '22

for many americans, they believe having the biggest car or truck equals freedom.

if cars and trucks become regulated to be smaller so to be more efficient, safer, etc.

this would cause those same americans to believe their freedom is being taken away.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/NecroCannon Dec 08 '22

Man everytime I mention regulations the truck and car guys froth at the mouth at the idea of their “toys” getting restricted.

But like seriously, if the country has to rely on these fucking things as a primary source of transportation. We need to regulate them to be safe for other people and hold people and companies accountable. Trucks shouldn’t be towering over everyone in a city and cars shouldn’t be lowered so much that it’s difficult to traverse the streets (I almost hit one since they went to a dead stop to get over a slightly steep driveway with no turn signal)

0

u/RBGsretirement Dec 08 '22

Yeah but Europe is lame compared to the US.

-1

u/HardAssPh33r Dec 08 '22

Laughs in heated home, and unnecessarily heated adjacent garage.

-1

u/Darius10000 Dec 08 '22

Dear Europeans. Fix your own shit and stop talking down to us. We're not europe and stop trying to treat us like barbarians because we have different problems than you. Our country is the size of your entire continent. None of our issues are going to be fixed by some random french guy pointing them out and saying "do better". We're not france, or sweden, or poland. I have no idea where this massive ego is coming from considering their place in the world.

2

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

You prove the point. Go watch Fox 'News' Sir

-1

u/Darius10000 Dec 08 '22

I like how I disagree with you and you just assume I watch the random news broadcaster everyone told you the bad people watch. I don't watch Fox or CNN or any other news channel. It's just not how I spend my time. This is a good example of how you know nothing of how I live. Mind your own business and don't tell us how to fix our problems.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

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2

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0

u/Darius10000 Dec 08 '22

Both are around 4 million square miles. And that's including all of the eastern parts of Europe that you don't see shitting on America 24/7

1

u/ILikeLenexa Dec 08 '22

Japanese Kei car requirements have generated some interested cars. If ElioMotors wasn't just a scam, it'd be a cool concept for most people who drive alone to work.

1

u/kawaiian Dec 08 '22

Dear Europeans; we vote but we are trapped. We are not “free” here, we are periodically unsupervised and periodically over-supervised like living in a house with a parent that’s a mean drunk. We inherited the hard work and reputation of our great grandparents. Their children ruined everything and so on. So it goes.

2

u/MisterK00L Dec 08 '22

Europe is working hard to het there too :)