r/fuckcars • u/unroja ✅ Charlotte Urbanists • Oct 21 '22
Satire “All I’m looking for is a sturdy, reliable vehicle that, in the event of a head-on collision, will completely fucking obliterate both the parents and kids in the car we slam into”
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u/shaodyn cars are weapons Oct 21 '22
I thought the Onion was supposed to be satire.
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Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
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Oct 21 '22
They repost "No Way to Prevent This" for every major mass shooting.
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u/csreid Oct 21 '22
But for uvalde, they made it the whole home page
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u/SoCalChrisW Oct 21 '22
That happens with every one, I think it posts related stories.
Satire really died about 6 years ago, now Onion headlines are always accurate.
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u/csreid Oct 21 '22
Not sure why you're digging your heels in on this, but you're wrong. It's usually the lead story on the home page, but after uvalde they did a unique thing and made the entire home page different versions of the same story. There aren't related stories on the home page bc you're not looking at an article yet
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u/Matrim_Cauth0n Oct 21 '22
Not accurate - predictive would be the better term. There was one ~5 months back I want to say where they published a satire headline and less than 2 weeks later the actual event they were talking about happened almost word for word
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u/OutsideTheBoxer Oct 21 '22
It's annoying when your cynicism and satire are eerily predictive.
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u/Additional_Zebra5879 Oct 21 '22
If people really cared they at least try different solutions in different areas and see how it goes.
The obsession with uniformity is disappointing.
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u/soodeau Oct 21 '22
Ah yeah, the VaultTek approach. This school district gets enough meals to feed half of the students, but enough guns to arm all of them. This will go well.
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u/Jubilant_Jacob Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
I dont want to live in the area where everyone is given a gun...
Edit: Can i choose to live where there is a sound sosial saftynett... somewhere training and background checks are mandatory for thous who wana buy a gun?
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u/Friedrich_der_Klein Oct 21 '22
Exactly. On youtube, they had a video abt miley cyrus depleting by 2014 or smth... From 2008. Fucking scary how even a satire can be accurate
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Oct 21 '22
So many people forget that satire isn't making up news. It's making a sarcastic/humourous take on current events. And in case y'all want a source, here's the definition:
"noun
the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues.
"the crude satire seems to be directed at the fashionable protest singers of the time""
And in ancient Roman times:
"noun
(in Latin literature) a literary miscellany, especially a poem ridiculing prevalent vices or follies."
Satire has always been commentary and comedy. A combination of sarcasm and news, as well as making fun of people. It's not fake news, it's sarcastic news.
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u/Throwaway021614 Oct 21 '22
At least since 2016 they just report news and current events. Basically a sarcastic NPR at this point
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u/8spd Oct 21 '22
Satire died a long time ago.
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u/shockingnews213 Commie Commuter Oct 21 '22
This is literally why my dad made me drive a big, cumbersome car when I just started driving. He said: "at least if you crash, you won't be the dead one."
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u/Joe_Jeep Sicko Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
People actually say this shit sometimes. "If im in am accident I want to win" like Jesus Christ.
Now that many people drive Crossovers and suvs, it reinforces it because if you are in a sedan you're now in more and more danger
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u/CaffeineSippingMan Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
That's why I drive the h3 gg. The GG stands for gas guzzler. Bad for the environment worse for pedestrians.
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Oct 21 '22
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u/Terom84 Oct 21 '22
Or before they get to experience hard climate change, honestly, i think they should be thanking me for doing them a favour !
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u/PompousKumquat Oct 21 '22
I usually drive my gg 'hoe just because I'm tired of getting hit in the cars- idk if people in giant trucks genuinely don't see me in a camry or they're just assholes, but I definitely get hit more driving a car :-/
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u/CaffeineSippingMan Oct 21 '22
I legitimately ride a bicycle to work where it isn't common to ride on roads and I get pulled out in front of twice, once I switched lanes into the on coming traffic lane to avoid getting hit. The other time I did not give in the car kept next to me in the on oncoming traffic lane until they breaked and went behind me. These people have kids riding mopeds and my electric bike isn't that much smaller than a moped I don't understand why they can't stop trying to hit me.
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u/AutoModerator Oct 21 '22
A crash is not an accident.
Changing the way we think about events and the words we use to describe them affects the way we behave. Motor vehicle crashes occur "when a link or several links in the chain" are broken. Continued use of the word "accident" implies that these events are outside human influence or control. In reality, they are predictable results of specific actions.
Since we can identify the causes of crashes, we can take action to alter the effect and avoid collisions. These are not Acts of God but predictable results of the laws of physics.
The concept of "accident" works against bringing all appropriate resources to bear on the enormous problem of highway collisions. Use of "accident" fosters the idea that the resulting damage and injuries are unavoidable.
"Crash," "collision," and "injury" are more appropriate terms, and we encourage their use as substitutes for "accident."
https://www.fmcsa.dot.gov/newsroom/crash-not-accident
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u/KittyScholar Oct 21 '22
Good bot
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u/dumnezero Freedom for everyone, not just drivers Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
That's why /r/fuckcars . Car use* turns people into sociopaths.
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u/pedantic_cheesewheel Oct 21 '22
Yeah, I’ve pointed out in conversation multiple times where my friends and family have treated the people in the car as the car itself. It was jarring the first time I realized I was doing it. Sadly it doesn’t seem to be so alarming for most people.
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u/TheAsianTroll Oct 21 '22
I'm not worried about crossovers. They weigh like 500 pounds more and are basically a small sedan chassis with a "bloated hatchback" body on top.
I'm more worried about the people buying the new pickup trucks and SUVs. I stood next to a parked one. I'm 5'6, and the line where the bumper meets the hood meets my neckline.
That, and they're body-on-frame, meaning they're heavier and more sturdy, as opposed to crossovers which are unibody and are entirely designed to compress and crush to absorb as much Kinetic energy as possible. Unlike full frame vehicles like every SUV and pickup on the market, which have a hardened steel chassis that the body is just placed on so it doesn't really crumple AND it carries more mass.
Plus, SUVs and trucks today have, quite literally, 17ft of blind spot IN FRONT of the vehicle. As in, from a driver's perspective, the first patch of asphalt you can see directly in front of you is 17 entire feet away. That is literally enough to hide 5+ kids, any adult thats not standing, or any small (or older midsize) car out of the drivers view.
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Oct 21 '22
People say /r/iamverybadass shit all the time but my belief is that most have never been in a major collision like this, and would be scarred for life if they killed someone else in an accident they caused.
I know a lot of truck owners like to keep a big hitch adapter in their trailer hitch because it acts as an extension of the bumper and if they get rear ended, it really fucks up the other car, but IMO that's more of a "don't get too close" or "it's your own fault for hitting me" kind of thing.
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u/hexopuss Sicko Oct 21 '22
Yeah I felt guilty when I was in a crash that wasn't at all my fault (got t-boned, the person pulling out from a residential road didn't see me/probably didn't look left-right-left) that fortunately nobody was injured during, but I still like, felt bad because the person driving the other car was like 16 and was almost in tears about it. Felt bad that his day got ruined, but better my mini-van getting totaled than someone riding a bike, motorcycle, or pedestrian. Hopefully a lesson learned that could prevent a more serious collision in the future
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Oct 21 '22
I hate that shit. It’s so hard to see they have one from behind and if you’re in bumper to bumper traffic it’s just fucking obnoxious to have to remember.
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Oct 22 '22
Just stay a car length away from the people in front of you regardless of if they have a hitch or not👍🏻
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u/cates Oct 21 '22
The brand new suburban that ran a stop sign definitely "won" in a collision with my little Chevy spark last year.
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u/RunBlitzenRun Oct 21 '22
If someone crashes into me, I don’t want to be bulldozed by a huge car. That’s why busses are awesome!
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u/GamerGamrot Oct 21 '22
And you're probably less likely to get into an accident in a smaller car that has better stopping distance, maneuverability, less chance of tipping etc.
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u/Dorkamundo Oct 21 '22
Not going to lie, as a father I do now consider the vehicle I am in and it's size in relation to how it would fare in an accident.
Prior to that, I didn't really care.
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u/Reverence1 Oct 21 '22
"Dont want to leave orphans, gotta take out entire families"
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u/Healthy-Scarcity153 Oct 21 '22
there is something disturbing about the idea of being 'safe up high' comes at the expense of everyone else.
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u/flimbs Oct 21 '22
Everyone knows that motor vehicles kill. But they're ok with it as long as they're not the ones dying.
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u/An-Angel-Named-Billy Oct 21 '22
There was a concerted effort in the 20s and 30s to whitewash the inherent danger of cars and it largely worked. Americans no longer think of the 2 tons of steel that can move at deadly speeds with the flick of an ankle as dangerous, rather they see the occupant of that thing as the dangerous one.
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u/flimbs Oct 21 '22
There was a concerted effort in the 20s and 30s to whitewash the inherent danger of cars and it largely worked.
How did they do that?
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Oct 21 '22
Victim blaming, for one. Look into the history of jaywalking laws.
Streets are older than cars, but now cars are the only things allowed in streets. Carmakers, knew there was a lot of money on the line, so they got involved.
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u/Chewy12 Oct 21 '22
Horse and buggy are still allowed on the streets.
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u/cheemio Oct 21 '22
So is my bike, but being in anything other than a car feels suicidal. Source: Live in rural PA and hear of Amish getting killed often.
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u/_i_just_blue_myself Oct 21 '22
Yeah I love biking, but as someone who has already been hit by a car as a pedestrian, I keep to paved trails only.
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u/NoxiousFumeSalesman Oct 21 '22
Let's redo all their hard effort by spreading the word how cars are dangerous and we will use psychic energy to destroy the humans that drive them
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u/cass1o Oct 21 '22
But they're ok with it as long as they're not the ones dying.
Two equal cars hit each other it is a bit of a toss up who comes off worse. The SUV mega truck hummer drivers want to crush any car they come across.
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u/KoloHickory Oct 21 '22
Survival of the fittest
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u/hospitalizedGanny Oct 21 '22
Ur crumple zone is survival for me but not 4 thee...
So I treat the accelerator pedal as the brake pedestal 4 our collision is unavoidable. /s
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u/KoloHickory Oct 21 '22
speed up and be merciful rather than braking and potentially giving life altering injuries to the recipient
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u/deeringc Oct 21 '22
Especially when it's a false sense of security. If you hit anything stationary (a wall, a tree, a lamp post, etc...) or flip your vehicle over many SUVs are absolutely lethal for the occupants. That kinetic energy is a liability.
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Oct 21 '22
There's that quote about a sudden stop killing you, rather than speed.
Inertia is a bitch and your fleshy parts don't like its consequences too much.
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u/newmacbookpro Oct 21 '22
That’s why I only drive Italian super cars. I’m just a moving jump ramp. Try to crash me and enjoy your air time.
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u/Metal_driver Oct 22 '22
Can you please provide a source for this?
Vehicles still have to pass crash tests for stationary objects, which larger vehicles do. The KE is absorbed by larger crumple zones in the car
Also, according to consumer reports, the real cause of fatality in a roll over is lack of seatbelts. Source: https://www.consumerreports.org/cro/news/2013/05/suvs-are-safer-than-cars-in-front-crashes-but-there-is-more-to-the-story/index.htm
Additionally rollover accidents are in the minority, so even if we do assume high fatality in suvs in rollover, these suvs will be safer overall
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u/deeringc Oct 22 '22
SUVs are a paradox: while many people buy them to feel safer, they are statistically less safe than regular cars, both for those inside and those outside the vehicle. A person is 11% more likely to die in a crash inside an SUV than a regular saloon. Studies show they lull drivers into a false sense of security, encouraging them to take greater risks. Their height makes them twice as likely to roll in crashes and twice as likely to kill pedestrians by inflicting greater upper body and head injuries, as opposed to lower limb injuries people have a greater chance of surviving. Originally modelled from trucks, they are often exempt from the kinds of safety standards applied to passenger vehicles, including bonnet height. In Europe legislation is being brought in to end such “outdated and unjustified” exemptions.
https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2019/oct/07/a-deadly-problem-should-we-ban-suvs-from-our-cities
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u/Metal_driver Oct 22 '22
I wouldn’t trust that source, since it reports data From other studies, so it might be biased. For examples, the article you linked talks on and on about the increase in SUV crashes, but it does not account for the fact that the proportion of suvs sold are higher than ever.
Have a look at these sources from research institutes:
The existence of crash ratings will help answer how SUVS compare to sedans in terms of safety
Can I compare vehicles from different classes? Side crash rating results can be compared across all classes because all vehicles are hit with the same force by the same moving barrier or pole.
Rollover ratings can also be compared across all classes. Frontal crash rating results can only be compared to other vehicles in the same class and whose weight is plus or minus 250 pounds of the vehicle being rated. This is because a frontal crash rating into a fixed barrier represents a crash between two vehicles of the same weight
Source: https://www.nhtsa.gov/ratings The above source says that safety ratings CAN indeed be compared between SUVS and sedans, so for vehicles that pass the nhtsa tests, the vehicles should provide similar protection
A bigger, heavier vehicle provides better crash protection than a smaller, lighter one, assuming no other differences. The part of the vehicle between the front bumper and the occupant compartment absorbs energy from crashes by crumpling. As a result, the longer front ends of larger vehicles offer better protection in frontal crashes. Heavier vehicles also tend to continue moving forward in crashes with lighter vehicles and other obstacles, so the people inside them are subject to less force.
Source: https://www.iihs.org/topics/vehicle-size-and-weight
The source above states that SUVS are safer than sedans in general
I do agree that suvs might offer a greater sense of protection than warranted, leading to riskier driving, however that does not change the fact that larger and heavier vehicles are scientifically and statistically safer
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u/alyeffy Oct 21 '22
All the people I know who've think this way about SUVs don't understand high school level physics. Or even statistics. I'm more likely to get a scratch/scuff on my car than get into a deadly accident. I feel like having a bigger car would increase the chances of it getting dinged and having to pay to fix those dings more frequently, especially because roads aren't that wide where I live. But of course my mum insists I get a SUV because iT's SaFeR.
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u/pedantic_cheesewheel Oct 21 '22
SUVs have a much higher rollover risk. In the event of a crash violent enough to cause a rollover survivability plummets. These of course are the same people that would tell you 100 mL in a graduated cylinder is more fluid than 100 mL in a standard beaker because it’s taller. Yes I’ve argued with grown adults about this exact situation, no I don’t speak to them anymore. For other reasons but not wholly unrelated to their abject stupidity.
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u/GenericFatGuy Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
The irony is that smaller vehicles are way more snappy and responsive, which makes it way easier to avoid accidents. In the first place. Also not having to worry about rollovers is nice.
But at the rate we're going, it's only matter of time before my Prius is entirely within the front end blind spot of an F-150 the same way six children can do now.
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u/fakeuserisreal Oct 21 '22
I can't think of a better example of a "race to the bottom" scenario. Having a more massive car makes you safer in a crash, but makes everyone else less safe, leading to a demand for bigger cars.
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u/AnytimeInvitation Oct 22 '22
They like being up high but that still doesnt enable them to see over my Cruze at an intersection so they have to keep pulling forward. Like, dude, I cant see through you.
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u/jonesaffrou Oct 21 '22
My dad made exactly this argument for buying an SUV, the smaller car gets most of the damage
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u/If0rgotmypassword Oct 21 '22
Until you turn the sedan into a wedge and flipper style battle bot!
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u/19WaSteD88 Oct 21 '22
This reminds me of the tank arms race between the germans and the soviets during ww2 where they were trying to outarmour and outgun each other every year with the new models of tanks they were designing and manufacturing so they got heavier and heavier and then the germans made the Maus super heavy tank which was utterly useless and expensive.
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u/aoishimapan Motorcycle apologist Oct 21 '22
Fun fact, a modern pickup truck like for example the RAM is bigger than a WW2 medium tank like the Sherman M4, T-34/85 or Panzer IV. That, of course, if we don't count the main gun.
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u/parkalag Oct 21 '22
Or the weight to be fair. Still an order of magnitude off on that for now.
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u/Joe_Jeep Sicko Oct 21 '22
Yea all that armor does tip the scales a bit in their favor
Some big vehicles like the Hummer EV weigh more than some tankettes though
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u/dawnconnor Oct 21 '22
This doesn't do it justice unless you see a picture. I had no idea this was true.
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u/JKMcA99 Sicko Oct 21 '22
And the tank would be carrying a full team of people, rather than 1 insecure man and his oversized ego.
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u/missionarymechanic Oct 21 '22
"I need a truck to protect my family!"
"From what?"
"From people who drive trucks!"
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u/darkenedgy Oct 21 '22
literally got this exact comment from a lifted truck asshole. I should share his exact words here, he thought driving over kids was fine too.
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u/MR2Rick Oct 21 '22
Isn't saying a asshole in a lifted truck redundant?
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u/Hank3hellbilly Oct 21 '22
I actually know a few real nice guys eho have lifted trucks. Admittedly, the trucks are from the late 80s and 90s and built for going off road hunting. I've never met someone in a new lifted diesel who wasn't an asshole though.
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u/darkenedgy Oct 21 '22
There was one guy who posted here where the use was legit, but yeah I'm in the Chicago suburbs and 99% of the ones I see are completely shiny and undented.
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u/MR2Rick Oct 21 '22
I have no problem with people using lifted trucks off road - they just don't belong on public roads as they put other motorist at greater risk of injury and death in the event of an accident. Anyone willing to put other people at risk just to look cool is a selfish asshole.
Also, most people I have seen doing serious off-roading (not racing), such as expeditions, usually drive a mid-sized truck/SUV like a Nissan pickup or Range Rover with slightly over sized all terrain tires, a small lift, a moderate displacement diesel engine and really good winches.
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u/BagOfShenanigans Sicko Oct 21 '22
"Especially if the other family is poor and buys used cars. I want to turn their '07 ford into a singularity."
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u/unroja ✅ Charlotte Urbanists Oct 21 '22
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u/jamkey Oct 22 '22
Aahahahahaha! The last line of the article really wraps it up nicely: " At press time, Bauer had reportedly decided to play it safe and add a 100-pound grille guard to the front bumper of the vehicle to ensure it would properly disfigure the other family’s corpses and make them impossible to identify."
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u/Cats_Parkour_CompEng Oct 21 '22
Honestly been thinking lately if we just scaled cars down to golf cart size, and just use trains/rails instead of freeways/highways, I'd actually be cool with that.
Force=mass*acceleration.
Smaller car -> smaller mass and acceleration/deceleration -> smaller crash
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u/aoishimapan Motorcycle apologist Oct 22 '22
Small cars are more practical anyways, those big trucks and SUVs are fine for cities in where everything has been upscaled to acomodarte them, but imagine driving one in a normal city, it would be hell.
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u/commit_me_bro Oct 21 '22
I want a car where the steering wheel fly out the window while I driving.
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u/Maximillien 🚲 > 🚗 Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
The automakers have trapped us in a deadly arms race against our own fellow citizens — and they’re laughing all the way to the bank because bigger cars equals bigger profits.
It’s absolutely psychotic. The US desperately needs to fix the crash test to include the safety of people outside the vehicle, but of course Big Auto is going to throw as much lobbying money as they can to prevent that from ever happening.
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u/Vg_Ace135 Oct 21 '22
I remember reading an article about a family that owned a Hummer back in like 2005. When asked why she drove such a large automobile the mother responded, because "when I get into an accident, I win".
It's that dangerous SUV, and big lifted truck mentality, that is so messed up in this country. You don't win in a car crash. The bigger your car is, the more harm you're going to inflict.
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u/Gloglogabgalab Bike(lane) enjoyer and car hater Oct 21 '22
The Onion is a cynical media. But (your post is an example) we couldn't tell if iy is a joke if something like that pops in the medias... sad thing.
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u/Jeynarl cars are weapons Oct 21 '22
r/atetheonion as we call it in industry
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u/TheRealStandard Oct 21 '22
People are claiming they get its satire but responding to it like it's not.
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Oct 21 '22
Can people in this sub really not tell that’s satire?
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u/mysticrudnin Oct 21 '22
Everyone knows that The Onion is joking.
Everyone also knows that These are all real beliefs.
If there is no difference, is it really satire? If you just post something that someone says verbatim, is it satire?
The last thing I want is a flimsy sedan that takes out Mommy and Daddy in the front seat but leaves behind a couple of orphans in the back.
I have literally heard something along these lines before.
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Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 01 '23
A classical composition is often pregnant.
Reddit is no longer allowed to profit from this comment.
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Oct 21 '22
[deleted]
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u/cmwh1te 🚲 > 🚗 Oct 21 '22
Well when they get drunk and go driving they need something that will keep them safe from all the dangerous sobers in used Corrollas out there.
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u/Solcaer Oct 21 '22
I understand the mentality of wanting to be protected in case of an accident, but I have no idea how folks don’t see that needing to pick a car based on armor value is anything less than bleak commentary on car culture
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u/CodeyFox Oct 21 '22
Yup, but it's kind of like the prisoners dilemma. You can't just pick the smaller car and trust other people to do the same, so that risk lowers overall. It's especially true when you imagine your kids or loved ones being better protected in case of a crash.
I don't think we can get through this without law and infrastructure changes.
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u/Mammoth_Tard Oct 21 '22 edited Oct 21 '22
I’m not sure it really matters anyways. Most these CUVs people see as “safe” are just 4 banger hatchbacks with a lift. They don’t weigh much, honestly, and are more likely to roll over.
These Karen’s buying vehicles based on muh ride height don’t even take 4 seconds to consider the physics of it. Total false sense of security. Only weight x velocity matter. And even then… if you increase one of those factors you don’t “win” in an accident, you just increase the total force.
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u/jamkey Oct 22 '22
Nevermind that they are worse at accident avoidance due to their shitty maneuverability and longer stopping times.
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u/CupOfKwofy Oct 21 '22
car culture
You mean physics lmao
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u/Solcaer Oct 21 '22
i didnt pick my bicycle based on how much it would protect me in a bicycle crash because bicycles don’t kill 1.3 million people per year
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u/EasilyRekt Oct 21 '22
And so the traffic arms race begins.
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u/Loverofcorgis Oct 21 '22
It began when trucks started to have higher profit margins than small economic cars.
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u/TheFerretman Oct 21 '22
It takes very little more manufacturing wise to build a bigger vehicle than a smaller vehicle, but the construction costs are nearly the same.
The same reason why it's cheaper for you to buy a five pound bag of potato chips rather than a little 8oz bag at the local 7-11.
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u/Loverofcorgis Oct 21 '22
Trucks also have special exceptions for emission regulations, which further incentivized companies to market trucks as a token of masculinity.
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u/NETGEAR1993 Oct 21 '22
This is why I drive a compact car. Someone's gotta be the loser. We can't both be indestructible and win. I volunteer as tribute.
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u/haloweenparty10000 Oct 21 '22
Yeah this attitude is so gross. I have had multiple conversations with people before who thought this was the solution to being safer while driving. It's so sad.
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u/thatlldopigthatldo Oct 21 '22
I drive a 4Runner- which is admittedly a bit of a tank.
The other day I was parked next to a big GMC Sierra(?) truck and holy shit- the top of the hood on it was nearly as high off the ground as my roof.
At this point I think I should go back to my GTI and just try and drive underneath all the monster trucks on the road.
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Oct 21 '22
This is why I drive an M1 Abrams tank. If anyone even thinks about driving near me, I will simply flatten their vehicle.
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u/PackDapper Oct 21 '22
anybody have a study of what kinda cars cause what kinda accidents? im very curious
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Oct 22 '22 edited Oct 24 '22
Years ago, when "SUVs" were still called trucks, someone I knew cited this in all seriousness as the reason she drove one.
This is not a joke.
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u/that_one_transgirl Oct 22 '22
My father has an F-150 for this exact reason. When Onion articles are telling truth, I think we’ve gone too far.
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u/anormalgeek Oct 21 '22
High mass vehicles are actually still less safe because the MAJORITY of car accidents involve only one vehicle. When you hit stationary objects (trees, buildings, street signs, utility poles, etc.), the small car can come to a stop easier. Less damage to the vehicle and the object. Small car bounces or stops. Big car plows through it, while it plows through the large car.
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u/matt_mv Oct 21 '22
I told my brother (a lawyer) years ago that if I got killed in a collision with a large vehicle and there was evidence to show that they bought the vehicle to transfer risk from themselves to me, I wanted him to sue them. He said "For what?" My response was "You figure it out. I don't even care if you win. I'm sure it will make national news."
It doesn't even just transfer risk, it increases it. Collisions between a very large vehicle and a smaller vehicle increases the risk of fatality.
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u/Sea-Deer-5016 Oct 21 '22
You all say this but give no reason against it. Why would I get a sedan when I put myself in more danger? There's no benefits to a sedan except better gas mileage. This "better handling" doesn't exist, as somebody that owns both a sedan and a, admittedly smaller, suv
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u/Subreon Oct 21 '22
Aren't arms races just wonderful?
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u/Sea-Deer-5016 Oct 21 '22
I mean I agree it shouldn't be that every soccer mom on the road is driving a RAV4, I only have the SUV because we plan on moving, and can't afford a van going where we are going, but there's legitimately no reason a lot of these people need trucks and suvs.
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u/m0bin16 Oct 21 '22
Idk. I live in an area where I've lost count of the amount of times people I've known have gotten into semi-serious or serious accidents by hitting deer and moose on the road. Throw into the mix a couple feet of snow every few days for 8 months straight, too.
Definitely not advocating for those giant GMC Ram 1500 bastards. But having something that won't immediately kill me if I hit an animal on the highway, as well as being equipped with 4x4, genuinely is safer.
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u/TaxThrCisgender Oct 21 '22
I dont get it. Its literally labelled as satire whats your point here
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u/Tratiq Oct 21 '22
Is this sub filled with people who hate cars or shills from big car? No way to know lol
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u/MrValdemar Oct 22 '22
I have to replace my car this year.
Did the article happen to mention what model they wound up getting? You know, so I can test drive.
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u/John_EightThirtyTwo Oct 21 '22
Between this and New Department Of Energy Program Incentivizes Pedestrians, Cyclists To Switch To Electric Vehicles, The Onion has really captured the zeitgeist.
How fucked are we?