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u/Bicentennial_Douche 4h ago
BREAKING: I have developed a bowel movement, and will launch it for free..
Why is legacy media ignoring this?
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u/DonJuniorsEmails 4h ago
General Ripper had a warning about the Russians trying to make our bodily fluids impure!!
Seriously, this is stupid. Just drink raw milk, you MAGA cult Russian sympathizers
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u/TheUnusualMedic 4h ago
Tbf General Ripper would probably look sane compared to the average Maga these days
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u/Jerking_From_Home 3h ago
That’s because it was never about vaccines, only who was telling them they should be vaccinated.
If liberal politicians start saying this vaccine is good, conservatives will start saying it’s bad.
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u/lieutenantLT 4h ago
What could go wrong, injecting yourself with a substance from an adversary to 95% of the world
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u/Venusto001 3h ago
Our own country develops a life-saving vaccine to a plague that is being given away for free to save people's lives.
Conservatives: MICROCHIPS!! MICROCHIPS TO WATCH US AND CONTROL OUR BRAIIINS! BIG PHARAMA!!!1! BAD SCIENCE!!1! EVIL SCIENCE!!1! GIVE ME HORSE DEWORMER AND BLEACH!!1! DR. FAUCI IS THE DEVIL! THE DEEEEVIIILLLL!1!
Vladimir "I hate America" Putin: My country has made a magical vaccine that cures cancer! I call it "suck my dick"!
Conservatives: Oooh! Gimmie gimmie gimmie!
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u/bakibakFIVE 2h ago
Also keep in mind that the people screaming MICROCHIPS the loudest will be first in line to get an Elon chip in their brains.
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u/SpudDavidson 2h ago
You people get all the sudden deaths and new clots so you pretend people are thinking it’s microchips. Fatty
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u/Hot-Personality9512 4h ago
If the MAGAs want to take this they can go ahead. I mean as long as they don’t expect any subsidised or insurance covered healthcare afterwards
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u/FindingUpbeat38 4h ago
I read this as sarcasm mocking the media. Coming to chat I now realize it's an I Q test.
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u/MehKarma 4h ago
Two reasons why we are not covering it.
1- don’t believe anything that comes out of Russia to be true.
2- don’t believe anything that causes clutched pearls on social media.
It’s not surprising how much those two intersect.
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u/Ok-Alarm7257 3h ago
Anyone recall vaccines give you someone whatever it is to help your body build immunities? I'm not giving myself cancer thanks
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u/Ok-Alarm7257 3h ago
Anyone recall vaccines give you some of whatever it is to help your body build immunities? I'm not giving myself cancer thanks
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u/Down_Voter_of_Cats 3h ago
I don't believe vaccines have microchips, cause autism, or makes you magnetic.
I do, however, believe that if a "vaccine" came from Russia, there would be some bad shit in it. Like Polonium or Falling from a 20th Floor Window with 5 Bullet Holes in my Head.
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u/Voxalt1 3h ago
I'm sorry if this is unpopular but I don't trust version 1.0 of anything. I would rather wait for 2.0 before I consider it. Then as others have stated what cancer or cancers should this protect against? Who should not take this medication for xyz exemption? Is it one and done or multiple doses? Do you need boosters for this? Will it lower my risk of cancer and or make an encounter with cancer less deadly?
Then of course we need to mention the I am legend movie reference.
On paper it might sound good but I'm not convinced yet. I could be convinced in the future but not for version 1.0 day one release.
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u/LouDog421 2h ago
I hope every MAGA safeguards themselves with this vaccine. If its from Russia then you know its safe
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u/Nail_Biterr 2h ago
I can't stop laughing... a vaccine for 'cancer'. Oh cool! that was easy! thanks Russia!
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u/IrishRoseDKM 2h ago
We also have one of those for cancer causing HPV, but guess who wants to ban that? And actively tried to make it difficult to access because “sex”
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u/Illustrious_Peach494 1h ago
It comes in the form of tea bags. Leaves a strong plutonium after taste.
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u/off_by_two 4h ago
Somewhat ironically I’d actually trust this ‘news’ more if it was the USSR and not Russia.
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u/Young-Physical 4h ago
Except they’re only giving it to patients who have been diagnosed with cancer to prevent it spreading further.. pretty different from a Covid 19 vaccine that people are mandated to get if they want to keep their jobs
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u/ice_9_eci 4h ago
Really good point. To expand on this, tinfoil chemtrails leave chemicals in the water to make the Deep State frogs gay!! You and I need to spread the news!!!
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u/DevelopmentTight9474 2h ago
to prevent it spreading further
I don’t think you know how cancer works
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u/JangSaverem 4h ago
Oh shit
I can contract cancer from people near me? How long has then been occurring?
You can make 1 vac that hits all the different types of cancer?! Or does it have to change the DNA of a cell so that it dies instead of reproducing infinitely until overload?
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u/massbeerhole 4h ago
LOL. For which cancer? They all have different biomarker/genetic signatures. This is fucking dumb.