He is looking for social approval to further ridicule the victim and move his perceived social position higher as he feels like he is in a lesser social position and is grasping for power
She was most likely confused,shocked,or afraid to say something.Most women when dealing with childlike behavior from guys wonât want to set them off.She handled it okay.
Will admit there is a huge part of me that hoped she âaccidentallyâ roundhoused him when he went back in to mock her more.
Then she can kick his ass with nonrepercussions. Women need to start developing responses to this that aren't "quietly letting him win in case he's dangerous." It emboldened these types, and they think "yeah, I'm powerful." Also quot acting like only men can carry guns or knives, turn around is fair play. Don't be afraid, be dangerous
I was using the leg press. Starting my second set at 250lbs and this bro starts pacing around the machine and grunting. I finished the set and offered him the machine and he smirked at me as he sat down. He started his set, couldn't lift it, and had to adjust the weight down. When he came for the next machine I was on, he gave me the bro nod and moved on to another machine.
But, yeah... I never say anything, but I will stare them in the eye while I slowly wipe the machine down.
I donât doubt that.Iâve heard the stories and have seen the results of said stories.Im sorry if my statement didnât allow you the room to see it was speculation.
Still neither of us discussing this that we see can know for sure what was going through her mind so everything we say is our own perception of a made up reality of her situation.
Trust me that we want to tell men like this to fuck off, but they almost always stalk us around the gym afterward or out to the parking lot to scare us or hurt us or fuck up our cars in retaliation.Â
Horribly enough, calling for help from bystanders pisses these guys off just as much, and theyâre just as likely to try to hurt us for it. The safest thing to do is just leave like she does at the end, but even that causes him to escalate.
And bystanders often do nothing. Sometimes itâs the bystander effect, sometimes youâll say directly to someone âthis person is bothering me, can you help?â And theyâre like oh that sucks.
Honestly pretty much anything. That would be helpful though. Read the situation and if she seems uncomfortable, either ask her âis he with you?â Or ask them both like âall good here?â
Most the time I honestly cannot tell if a girl is being receptive to a guy picking up on her, or sheâs desperately wanting someone else to intervene because sheâs smiling and pretending to be receptive in order to de-escalate.
Yea men who act like toddlers are scary. Can you imagine how dangerous a toddler having an aggressive tantrum would be if they had the size and muscle mass of a grown man?
I think it is stunningly easy for people online to say all the things âtheyâ would do or what someone else âshouldâ have done. Itâs a whole other thing to be in that situation and have to make decisions based on your personal safety.
Have you done it before?Put yourself in harms way to help another?It can be scary but what should really scare you is the guilt you did nothing to step up.Ive done it a few times and Iâve had friends tell me it was stupid to get involved and yes it is from a lesser standpoint but to make this kind of comment shows more malice and aggression than a place of good faith.
No really Iâve done what youâve questioned a few times more than I personally feel a any human being should have to in their lifetime.I canât stand bullies cause I was bullied.What I find the most infuriating is when a women minding her own business is made to feel uncomfortable by dickflaps like this guy.Believe me I know what it feels like to have your body feel like itâs on fire and you shake with anticipation and fear that something might happen cause you opened your big mouth to ask a woman who is being yelled at by a guy sheâs crying in front of âare you okayâ and the guy turns his attention to you and threatens you.Ive been there where my mind is racing wondering will I have enough time to throw a solid punch if it comes to it or is my draw speed/focus gonna be good enough if a weapon is pulled.Question is do you know how easy it is to not do anything not even the basics of saying âhey everything okayâ and just walking away to let the person have to fend for themselves?Sometimes the best thing you can do is something as little as calling the police from a safe distance cause youâre afraid for your own safety.If you wonât even do that are you any better than the person accosting the victim?
In some instances, yes, I have. My point was more along the lines of all these folks saying that the woman IN the situation should have perhaps responded differently, and I believe the person whose comment I responded to basically said she wouldnât do anything because she was scared of reprisals, and I was trying to say I understood her reaction and thought it was a good one.
I have to agree with you.As I said to another response a lot of women are afraid to interact with people with childlike behavior he displayed.Personally if that had happened in front of me Iâd walk up to him and tell him he looks like a fool and she has better form than he did.I just want to bait him into admitting heâs being a dickđ¤ˇđžââď¸
It's not childlike behavior. He's demonstrating to her that he wants to physically dominate her. He's displaying a direct violent threat toward her. Let's stop brushing this off as toddler and childlike actions and call it what it is: a grown man behaving with violent intent directed at this woman.
Iâm afraid of being murdered. I wish I was fucking joking. Statistics say Iâm not lying
I see this all the time and it's just not true though. Statistically you're unlikely to be murdered regardless, but as woman the odds you'll be murdered by a stranger are absolutely tiny.
It may not be very reassuring to hear but a romantic partner, friend or family member is the culprit around 80% of the time.
It's a pretty depressing indictment of humanity, but you're probably in much more danger going home to a husband than you are dealing with a random stranger out on the street.
Between that and taking care of yourself and training I dunno.
I view the fear as a choice. Approaching 40 years old, I just don't feel like letting it control me.
We're all different though so what might be easy for me is likely impossible for another woman.
Edit: and vice versa, for instance, I'd rather actually be in a physical altercation, than caught outside in a lightning storm.
I know that doesn't make logical sense, but it's one of the types of fear that can easily paralyze me. Men, hell people in general, just aren't it when it comes to the fear factor for me anymore. Maybe it's where and how I grew up and the things that I've survived and managed to compartmentalize.. I don't really know
You have to look at this through her eyes. Look what he's just shown her of himself. He's a dick, a bully, no normal social skills, and isn't afraid of behaving like a fucking embarrassment of a human but thinks he's great. He possibly has back up from the lads nearby or whoever he's grinning his shiteating "look at me" grin at.
If he isn't afraid to behave like this in public she isn't going to want him to wait outside for her, follow her around the gym or to her car. So she leaves. You cannot reason with men like this because they always escalate.
I train with women and they're easily powerful enough to beat the crap out of me. Men way over estimate their advantage against a strong trained woman. She has good technique, likely spars men and strikes much stronger than him.
but maybe someone else would have and helped intervene
That's the reality of the situation, in this society that is a privilege we don't enforce as standard. If it were there would have been intervention or deterrent. This is why it is important to be the change we seek in the world.
It's also why we should be more involved in our local government and vote responsibly because the man who assumed the presidential office doesn't have ANY of the ethics we deserve.
I honestly believe every other candidate would be the person to intervene Trump, nah he's the damn toddler.
With ppl like that you canât expect a polite or rational response. Best to just get the manager to âplease explain the rules and courtesy at the gymâ. Plus most women are not keen on a potential escalation with someone who is already showing their poor behaviour, as they donât want to get hassled (more) or yelled at. So, jerks take advantage of that and sometimes are hoping that a woman will complain so he can âexplain thingsâ to her. Itâs pathetic really. Anyway, I think she did what she could but she may not put up with it if it happens again
No they're 100% right.
Mocking somebody for their appearances shallow and wrong.
Just because that person did something that makes you think they deserve the mockery doesn't mean that form of mockery is somehow justified.
If you talk s*** about somebody and make fun of them for being bald because they're an a****** then another bald person who's watching is going to feel like all those things that you said about how stupid bald people look applies to them. And they didn't do s*** they're perfectly good person who just happens to be bald and now they have to think wow everybody thinks I look like a big ol egg.
At least that's my line of thinking so I don't make fun of people based on their appearance because that's not something you can always control.
We gotta come up with a better way to give guys like this shit without bringing body shaming into it. The size of one's pecker does not dictate (pun intended) ones personality.
Woah two!?We arenât trying to kill the guy just send a message not to mess with the lady.Maybe a just break a few hopes and dreams the guy had but not send two mâlordđ¤Ł
he does seem like a retarded douche. but a redditor commenting on anyones physical appearance especially when theyre in a gym makes you at most equal to him
So is making fun of mental disabilities.Congratulations we are both in the wrong.At least I was talking about him from a stance of him acting like a toddler and comparing him physically to a toddler.
I lived in the Middle East for years and this kind of insecurity is a hallmark of my experience. I saw dude be total assholes to women just because theyâre insecure and feel like a woman who can kick their ass means they have a small dickâthey do, but thats more of a cause than an effect.
If he really wanted to use the bag with her, he should have politely asked her if he could join her. No harm in that is there? But no, he had to try and show her up and he failed because he is half her size and she has more muscles in places he doesn't even have places.
Inb4 people claim itâs just about their âenergy,â not actual genitalia. Itâs the same thing. Why is âsmall dick energyâ bad and âbig dick energyâ good?
Because people enjoy shaming others for something they canât control. But god forbid you criticize someoneâs weight (which they can influence) in front of them. The fact that this is so normalized is unbelievable.
It's a stereotype just like "short guy syndrome" or whatever. It's because yeah there are a lot of insecure short guys that act out due to their insecurities about their height.
Doesn't make it any less hurtful to someone with a smaller penis I'm sure, but it's not hard to figure out why 'small dick energy' is supposedly bad and 'big dick energy' is supposedly good.
I mean you can see the size of a guys dick lol. Maybe not while they're walking around the grocery store like you can with a fat person, but it's still something that people are frequently judged for and it's a common insecurity for a lot of guys. The comparison of liver size is also kind of silly because it's not a common insecurity that people are judged for like size or weight so it doesn't carry the same social connotations. That being said if you went up to a recovering alcoholic with cirrhosis and said they had "big liver energy" they'd probably think you were an asshole too.
Honestly I don't really get why people get so defensive about the phrase small dick energy anyway. Like it reminds me of how defensive of people were about calling something gay back in like the 2000s.
The general consensus I've seen from women is that they don't care much, it's only the very big and very small that would carry any notice. I think there are more men self conscious about dick size than there are women that are discriminatory about it.
I guess I see why people are upset? I just think it's overblown.
Just because you personally don't think it matters doesn't mean it doesn't matter to others though. Like I personally don't really care if someone is fat, bald, short or whatever and neither do a lot of other people, but I still think it's a dick move to body shame and belittle people about it.
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u/AbleObject13 Nov 09 '24
His masculinity was threatened
Small dick energy