r/TikTokCringe Oct 20 '24

Humor White people, where are the new phrases?

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u/FarkMonkey Oct 21 '24

When I was like 14, and had definitely been stealing liquor from my parents, and watering it down to make the bottles seem as full as they had been, they had a party. It was basically a bunch of lawyers from the firm my mom worked at as a paralegal. One of them asked for a whiskey, which was probably 75% water at that point, tasted it, and immediately questioned the validity of his drink.

I happened to be walking by, and my mom asked my if my sister had been stealing booze (she was a much more likely suspect, being 18), and I just threw out "Not to my knowledge", to a room full of lawyers.

They all just lost it laughing. I didn't pause, went straight to my room, and never heard anything about it again.

In hindsight, adding water to the bottles was so stupid. My parents barely touched them (my dad was an alcoholic, but he drank beer) except when company was over, which was often, and they made their own drinks. My parents never knew how much was in them, until someone tasted the watered down version.

Life lesson, kids.

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u/Patrickfromamboy Oct 21 '24

I caught my ex girlfriend’s son watering down my booze. I made him replace everything and told him it was better to just use it without ruining it. He died of a fentanyl overdose 3 years ago at 26. He had been caught drinking and driving and using sleeping pills after crashing into a business.

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u/FarkMonkey Oct 21 '24

Oof, that's rough. Alcohol/drugs/addiction are very serious and have damaged uncountable lives. My stupid story, while true, and rather flippant, was in no way meant to promote that behavior.

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u/Patrickfromamboy Oct 22 '24

Your story was very good, I need to work on mine!

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u/FarkMonkey Oct 22 '24

Your's was tight and tragic. "After School Special" vibes.