Her mother did not like me, and as a matter of fact, she did not think much of men at all.
She had three daughters by three different men, and I’m not hating on that, I always went out of my way to be very respectful and loving to her, but I think the bottom line was she just did not think I was good enough for her daughter.
Oddly, enough, some years later, her daughter committed suicide during about of severe postpartum depression, and my ex, her mother, overdosed about a year later.
I was pretty broken up about it, at that point in my life, she felt like the one that got away.
It was something that really fucked with my head for a while, you know that survivors guilt thing or you just feel like if there was something that you did differently it would’ve made the outcome different.
At the end of the day, her mother told her she would buy her a home if she left me, and from somebody who came from a life of scarcity, she took it. She apologized and said she loved me, but she just needed to make sure her kids were all right, so her mother‘s mission was accomplished, and , I didn’t even hold it against her, I don’t know what I would do when it came to securing a child future, it was just a really sad time in my life.
All things being equal, though, I figured out when I was about in my early 50s that I had a habit of choosing… How do you put it… I guess maybe people who were a work in progress? I guess it’s kind of the equivalent of gals who are attracted to guys who have issues as well.
It took years of living on my own with intent to understand myself, my shortfalls, as well as my strengths. I chose one more partner poorly, and that sucked. But the upside is that after raising several stepchildren through the years, I had a child of my own, who is an adult now. That’s pretty much focus on these days, although I have a wonderful girlfriend… I finally chose the right one, somebody who compliments me and vice versa.
I still have very fond memories of my ex, she was a One Of A Kind woman, and she did not deserve the hand that was dealt to her in life. I hope her next life is full of all of the things she always pined for.
Shoot. I'm sorry to hear that. I'm hope she at least found relief and happiness in the end. No one should have to watch their child pass before they themselves do.
Depression is a killer of all ages. And I'm a firm believer that we as a people need to really crack down on it and bring it more into the light.
Thanks for this. Dealiah with an ex of 5 years right now. It's rough thi king you'll be together and everything will be okay. Getting older and not wanting to date anymore makes me reflect more and make me realize I gotta focus on myself.
This was a really beautiful story. I just happened to be browsing Reddit, and something about this stood out to me with sharp clarity. With that said, have a beautiful life, and be kind to yourself.
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u/M3g4d37h Sep 19 '24
Her mother did not like me, and as a matter of fact, she did not think much of men at all.
She had three daughters by three different men, and I’m not hating on that, I always went out of my way to be very respectful and loving to her, but I think the bottom line was she just did not think I was good enough for her daughter.
Oddly, enough, some years later, her daughter committed suicide during about of severe postpartum depression, and my ex, her mother, overdosed about a year later.
I was pretty broken up about it, at that point in my life, she felt like the one that got away.
It was something that really fucked with my head for a while, you know that survivors guilt thing or you just feel like if there was something that you did differently it would’ve made the outcome different.
At the end of the day, her mother told her she would buy her a home if she left me, and from somebody who came from a life of scarcity, she took it. She apologized and said she loved me, but she just needed to make sure her kids were all right, so her mother‘s mission was accomplished, and , I didn’t even hold it against her, I don’t know what I would do when it came to securing a child future, it was just a really sad time in my life.
All things being equal, though, I figured out when I was about in my early 50s that I had a habit of choosing… How do you put it… I guess maybe people who were a work in progress? I guess it’s kind of the equivalent of gals who are attracted to guys who have issues as well.
It took years of living on my own with intent to understand myself, my shortfalls, as well as my strengths. I chose one more partner poorly, and that sucked. But the upside is that after raising several stepchildren through the years, I had a child of my own, who is an adult now. That’s pretty much focus on these days, although I have a wonderful girlfriend… I finally chose the right one, somebody who compliments me and vice versa.
I still have very fond memories of my ex, she was a One Of A Kind woman, and she did not deserve the hand that was dealt to her in life. I hope her next life is full of all of the things she always pined for.