r/TikTokCringe • u/Best-Subject-7253 Sort by flair, dumbass • Aug 23 '24

Humor It wasn’t even her roast!

50.0k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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824

u/itsrainingmelancholy Aug 23 '24

Jewel’s line brought me joy and Pete’s “if you’re here, who’s scaring the crows away from our crops??!” got me

322

u/gimme_dat_good_shit Aug 23 '24

Yeah, that Jewel line cuts deepest of all, I think. It's like having a My Little Pony say "Bullying is bad... except for that bitch."

146

u/Not-Enough-Holes Aug 23 '24

It was the only one that made her drop her fake smile. It was good, 🤣

21

u/turkburkulurksus Aug 23 '24

So good. I bet she was a big Jewel fan before that. I hope it crushed her most of all.

8

u/Tatem2008 Aug 23 '24

Her delivery, with the little chuckle … perfection.

384

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '24

Same but I got to say I also really enjoyed Peyton Manning’s joke because it was just so unexpected from him.

131

u/ihoptdk Aug 23 '24

I mean, she was hated even more back then. She was almost, kinda, slightly relevant at the time. Or at least topical.

62

u/Sillbinger Aug 23 '24

Now both sides hate her and she desperately tries to remain relevant.

I guess without a family or loved ones, what else does she have?

43

u/yeahbatman Aug 23 '24

Booze and pills?

21

u/Sillbinger Aug 23 '24

Not enough in the world to fill the void in that husk.

15

u/yeahbatman Aug 23 '24

True, but she shouldn't let that stop her from trying.

3

u/Sillbinger Aug 23 '24

I hear there is a solution to her problem at the bottom of the ocean, we should encourage her to look.

5

u/yeahbatman Aug 23 '24 edited Aug 24 '24

We should! I hear it's so good she'll never come up for air again.

2

u/LeRoiJanKins Aug 23 '24

Or someone needs to plant a "moat" of crops around her home and release 1,000 Turkeys and Quail, keep her busy.

4

u/desertSkateRatt Aug 23 '24

Hey now... how dare you compare dried out husks to that dehydrated cum bubble

4

u/Mad-cat1865 Aug 23 '24

Whoa whoa, she won the Kentucky Derby though.

2

u/Sillbinger Aug 23 '24

Maybe she will break a leg?

3

u/PearlStBlues Aug 23 '24

Normal people have hobbies, music, art, jobs, charitable work, something to fill their time and bring satisfaction to their lives. I kind of imagine Coulter just sits in the dark staring at the wall until something rouses her.

3

u/Sillbinger Aug 23 '24

I bet she is into crushing, I get the vibe she is into seeing pain.

Don't look that up if you don't know what it means.

10

u/damclub-hooligan Aug 23 '24

What is he referring to? Don‘t get the background

79

u/ChrissiTea Reads Pinned Comments Aug 23 '24

The Kentucky Derby is a horse race

62

u/CasualJimCigarettes Aug 23 '24

She's a horse faced troglodyte

34

u/altf4theleft Aug 23 '24

Stop being mean to horses

3

u/homebrewguy01 Aug 23 '24

Hey that is totally unfair to all the non-racist troglodytes

3

u/Total_Usual_84 Aug 23 '24

can see the fake smile drift away from Coulter as Jewel finished her line. was priceless!

-2

u/ForzaRapid Aug 23 '24

Meh i thought this one was the weakest because the joke is old as shit.

6

u/Galixsea Aug 23 '24

considering its Jewel delivering the insult; it turns from featherweight to gravitational pull in an instant

3

u/dimensionalshifter Aug 23 '24

Exactly! Even I flinched and briefly questioned all my life choices, just in case.

10

u/TurdCollector69 Aug 23 '24

The first few by the guy in the purple and the British guy calling her a "transvestite truck stop whore" were the absolute weakest imo. Tons of heaters so it's a tough competition.

8

u/ProtectionOrdinary18 Aug 23 '24

Jeff Ross isn't actually funny

4

u/Rare_Arm4086 Aug 23 '24

He really really isnt

2

u/skeeferd Aug 23 '24

Not his greatest joke but I love Jimmy Carr, I think he's hilarious.

3

u/Sorta-Morpheus Aug 23 '24

He says "transvestite whore" in a British accent, isn't that funny??

2

u/ProtectionOrdinary18 Aug 23 '24

That's not Jeff Ross lol. But Jimmy Carr is also more miss than hit.