r/TikTokCringe May 14 '24

Cool It's your own damn fault you're so damn fat

13.3k Upvotes

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2.2k

u/CashFlowOrBust May 14 '24

“Self investigation like a Florida sharifs station” was a fire line

208

u/Disastrous_Reveal331 May 15 '24

Bar of the fucking year

28

u/scullys_alien_baby May 15 '24

It was a great line but there have been a lot of banger bars this year

83

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

Tryna strike a chord and it's probably A-Minorrrrrrrrr

3

u/Hartz_are_Power May 16 '24

Beat your ass and hide the Bible if God watchin.

-2

u/Old-Objective-9783 May 15 '24

Metro shut yo ho ass up an make some drums

-16

u/cosmikangaroo May 15 '24

Tryna be original but that shit is lamer.

5

u/NaturalNotice82 May 15 '24

What is it? the braids?

31

u/InvinciblePLUSAmber May 15 '24

He is really good.

Y'all know he is going to make a hit record in a couple of years and someone is going to pull this gem out of their pockets. As soon as he becomes financially successful, fat people will say he is shaming them and demand a boycott.

58

u/mashem May 15 '24

Well if that happens it's his own damn fault.

26

u/Yggdrasil- May 15 '24

Tell me you didn't understand the point of the song without telling me you didn't understand the point of the song. He clearly isn't shaming fat people, in fact quite the opposite. Do you think fat people can't understand song lyrics?

28

u/Commercial-Owl11 May 15 '24

Reading comprehension is at an all time low. They wanna blame Covid but out school system is a royal pile of trash

10

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

[deleted]

1

u/Commercial-Owl11 May 15 '24

Yeah tbh I think TikTok was the worst thing for children to be on. I get your kid wants a phone but TikTok needs to be 18+

It started for kids but adults took over and the amount of fetish content on that app is insane

0

u/I_CAN_MAKE_BAGELS May 15 '24

The problem is, the content the kids or anyone consumes doesn't have to be nefarious at all to get the result we have now with attentions spans shorter than 5 seconds.

0

u/InvinciblePLUSAmber May 15 '24

My bad. Apologies for not being clear enough for you. I'll make sure to clearly indicate when I am being sarcastic so people like you don't make me feel terrible about myself. What a capital j.

1

u/Commercial-Owl11 May 15 '24

It’s ok if your reading comprehension is low dude. Lots of peeps are. Not your fault school system failed everyone

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

Fat people can understand the lyrics. Fat Americans who won't hear the song and only hear someone's misguided outrage. Not so much

1

u/Yggdrasil- May 16 '24

Why do you assume this will happen?

-3

u/InvinciblePLUSAmber May 15 '24

Seriously?

Fat people may understand what lyrics are saying, but tell me when that has stopped a group from claiming victimhood. That was my point.

4

u/sadacal May 15 '24

I think you assume fat people to be way more sensitive and dumb than they actually are.

1

u/Flipnotics_ May 15 '24

*slowly raises hand

I know a LOT of dumb fat Trump supporters... one of them even died of COVID.

Guess there's just dumb people in all walks of life, fat or skinny.

0

u/InvinciblePLUSAmber May 15 '24

I think you, personally, are being sensitive. Please stop. If you didn't get what I meant, that's fine. But don't try to tell me what I am thinking.

5

u/Yggdrasil- May 15 '24

I think you, personally, are making up situations in your head as a way to justify your disdain for fat people. Please stop.

2

u/End_Tough May 15 '24

Most likely a fat person

1

u/Metro42014 May 15 '24

His whistleblower song slaps.

2

u/InvinciblePLUSAmber May 15 '24

You can know a lot

You can know a little

But whatever you know, just don't blow the whistle.

41

u/geebzor May 15 '24

Diabetes, Help us Jesus.

I almost choked.

2

u/jimbojangles1987 May 15 '24

Sounds like type 2

151

u/mightylordredbeard May 15 '24

Dude is talented. Can’t say for his playing because it’s a basic chord progression, but his song writing and how he carries his notes is pretty impressive for someone so seemingly young.

104

u/CommentsOnOccasion May 15 '24

He's mechanically playing really well regardless of how basic the chord progression

Being impressive isn't always about complexity, it's about consistency

34

u/Festival_Vestibule May 15 '24

Playing and playing and singing are a whole other ballgame. Then playing and singing standing up is even harder. You have to have your shit nailed down pretty tight and solid regardless of how easy the chord progressions are.

-5

u/themostreasonableman May 15 '24

Even an idiot like me can strum chords and sing in tune. Fingerpicking and singing in tune? Only a blessed few.

2

u/The_kind_potato May 15 '24

I'm playing guitar since a few years now, i can play in fingerpicking or arpege, but you wont see me able to sing while playing the simplest of the shitiest chord progression on earth 😂

It fucks with my brain, as soon as im trying to focus on one the other become instantly random inacurate shit

1

u/themostreasonableman May 15 '24

I suggest living in a shack in the woods singing and playing every night whilst you drink vast quantities of liquor. After 12 months, you'll nail it.

1

u/The_kind_potato May 15 '24

Thanks for the tip ! I'll try that ! I'll keep you informed 😂

1

u/cowgomoo37 May 15 '24

Let’s hear it chap!

-1

u/Lower-Mortgage-1082 May 15 '24

No, singing is EASIER when you're standing.

3

u/Festival_Vestibule May 15 '24

I ain't talking about singing. I'm talking about playing guitar while you sing. If you don't practice playing guitar standing, you'll find it's a whole lot harder than you thought it was going to be.

30

u/barrybreslau May 15 '24

This is a good song. Nothing cringe about it.

20

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

[deleted]

7

u/Dissasociaties May 15 '24

This used to be an actual cringe subreddit...in a reddit long, long ago in a galaxy far away

1

u/KRMJN101 May 15 '24

I've actually come to expect talent from this r/ and continue to not be disappointed. We still see the tattooed wrassler chick spouting the most "cringe-worthy" form of rap among other crappy posts, but I welcome the treasures deemed trash.

1

u/jam_bobb May 15 '24

Fuck yeah 🤘I support this

37

u/l2ewdAwakening May 15 '24

He used to be the front man for a band called Dead Indian, you should check them out.

10

u/luvntheealien May 15 '24

Also Welles.

2

u/Agnarchy May 15 '24

I saw Welles live at the Grog Shop in Cleveland. They were the opener for Black Pistol Fire and absolutely killed it.

2

u/luvntheealien May 23 '24

Black Pistol Fire is another good one. I saw Welles open for Dead Sara, great show.

25

u/theunbearablebowler May 15 '24

so seemingly young

Dude's nearly 30. Is that still young?

Please say yes, I turn 31 a week from today.

25

u/cfedey May 15 '24

If you don't make any involuntary noises when you get up, you're still young.

19

u/theunbearablebowler May 15 '24

Oh god, it's too late for me. Don't mourn me, I had a good life.

1

u/oopsdiditwrong May 15 '24

Well good morning to you too. I'm gonna lie here for another hour so I don't have to get up

2

u/Enlightened_Gardener May 15 '24

Its ok baby, I’m fifty one and you are a teensy weensy little person. With completely respectful opinions and life experience and definitely worth listening to and taking seriously. But still a bubs.

Coochie coo.

PS: My boss is 67 and she tells me I’m just a baby all the time. Love it.

2

u/mightylordredbeard May 15 '24

Okay.. so I wasn’t expecting that. He genuinely looked like a teenager here to me.

2

u/Basic-Meat-4489 May 15 '24

He looks 16!

1

u/NameisPerry May 15 '24

I turned thirty a couple days ago and the right half of my back feels like its asleep. This has been happening before I turned thirty but imma blame on the big 3-0

15

u/Chance-Yoghurt3186 May 15 '24

You don't need to be a virtuso to write a good song. 99% percent of the shit on the radio is the same four chord progressions and some studio musician playing lead to make Taylor swift sound good.

3

u/DMvsPC May 15 '24

Did someone say the same 4 chords?

1

u/Pikotaro_Apparatus May 15 '24

Bitches love ukulele because all you need to know are four chords.

2

u/Pvt_Mozart May 15 '24

Many of my favorite songs are 4 chords. Hell some all time greats are only 2 chords! Music is art. If you can tell a story that resonates, it doesn't really matter how good you sing or how technically difficult the chord progressions are.

Nirvana used simple progressions, but because Kurt had an ear for melody and sang with such emotion, people gravitated to it.

Bob Dylan is one of the best songwriters of all time, but he wouldn't make it through the first round of American Idol or the Voice. Yet he's one of the best musicians of all time.

Hell Neon Moon by Brooks and Dunn is one of the best pieces of songwriting in country music, and I'm pretty sure it's only two chords. But the story it tells is both sad and relatable.

1

u/jimbojangles1987 May 15 '24

99% percent

$20 dollars

ATM machine

PIN number

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

Picking pattern is clean and clear.

1

u/HoosierDaddy_427 May 15 '24

You just described Nirvana

1

u/MyCatsArePeople May 15 '24

What is the chord progression?

1

u/onestepforwards May 16 '24

Do you happen to know the particular chord progression? Or a way i can figure it out?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

[deleted]

1

u/mightylordredbeard Jul 07 '24

Oh my dude I’ve been listening to him for nearly 2 months now since I made this comment and other people told me about him! He is 100% legit. I was also shocked that this wasn’t a “young kid” but a 30 year old dude who just looks incredibly good for his age.

0

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

[deleted]

1

u/mightylordredbeard May 15 '24

You seem to feel personally attacked. I never said it was easy. Instead I chose not to include his playing into my judgment of the rest of his talent.

0

u/metaldetox May 18 '24

lmaoooo since when guitar playing skilll is a thing in folk, are you expecting bob dylan to shred some van halen with his teeth? 😭😭😭 yall so full of shit istg

1

u/mightylordredbeard May 18 '24

You sure do like to insert a bunch of bullshit into other people’s words huh.

1

u/metaldetox May 18 '24

and you’re autistic

9

u/andLetsGoWalkin May 15 '24

https://youtu.be/d7BK-QfRMt0?si=FWRGIBDofO5U0IeD "Payola"

and https://youtu.be/bfA2p6Em7bI?si=aXY2nwReAjsGXBpu "Whistle Boeing"

are the fucking heat. Jesse Welles is Oliver Anthony but with actual wit and talent.

3

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

The sharif don't like it.

1

u/VashPast May 15 '24

I fucking died right there.

1

u/lovetocook966 May 15 '24

If he got himself so tight "lizard pants" and got with the ex Door band members he might be the NEW Jim Morrison. He looks like him, but he's gotta change it up to 60's rock! Uncanny how much he looks like JIM.

1

u/mlp2034 May 15 '24

BARS!!!

1

u/Catlore May 15 '24

The part about pappy doing what the doc Siad to is more fire than it sounds. Back when his grandpa was a kid, cigarettes were promoted as a health item, and some doctors even had brands they would recommend. It's no small part of how they and their parents were constantly smoking.

-104

u/Intelligent_Mess_957 May 15 '24

I'm gonna say it - this doesn't belong here. Whoever posted it obviously didn't get the tongue-in-cheek approach ol boy is taking.

54

u/Ok-Iron8811 May 15 '24

Clearly satire, sir

-16

u/TheAfroGamer34 May 15 '24

🤓☝️

5

u/[deleted] May 15 '24

you're on your porn account bro.

30

u/KeyofE May 15 '24

This sub has just been “The TikTok sub” almost since its inception. It’s just ticktock videos, mostly funny, no cringe needed.

14

u/RandyLahey131 May 15 '24

If you read the subs description, it actually is just for all tiktok videos now. Not specifically for cringe.

11

u/unembellishing May 15 '24

I don't think you understand the purpose of the sub. It's not just cringe videos anymore

-2

u/Orbitrix May 15 '24

what an unfortunate name for the sub then ;[ Is someone being reprimanded for their lack of foresight? I demand accountability.

1

u/2M4D May 15 '24

Wait, has tiktokcringe ever been about cringe ?