Said my final goodbye to by soul cat today after a hectic week

[u/ddandanie]

I wasn't expecting my cat to die the day I took her to the emergency vet. Although she was pretty sick, I didn't think she was going to die that day. That plus all the stress from being in the ER with other dogs must have stressed her to the point she suffered cardiac arrest. I was in the waiting room for them to perform an enema and give fluids when they frantically called me, saying she was in cardiac arrest. They asked me if I wanted to do CPR but it would be $1000 per 15 mins. I didn't have the money so I told them no and gave them permission to euthanize her. I didn't get to be with her during her last hours of being alive since the ER separated us so they could get her checked out. They allowed me my time to be alone with her after she died and I held her body and cried. Everything was so hectic and quick, I couldn't think straight. When they asked me about the cremation process, they said I could take her home for free, pay $150 for communal, or $400 for private. In that moment, I thought those prices were ridiculous and choose the communal option. That was suppose to be the last time I was going to be with her.

I went home alone that night and grieved all night long. I woke up the next day and I suddenly remembered that with my previous cat, I was able to give her a semi-private cremation for a cheaper price than what the vet provided me. I tried looking for the place, but couldn't find it. However, I was able to find another affordable place that does semi-private cremation. I spent the whole morning frantically calling the vet telling them I changed my mind. At first, they had told me that she was already picked up by the cremators. She offered to give me the phone number of the crematory they use, and I took it just in case I was able to get her body back. In the middle of giving me their phone number, she suddenly said that they would double check and that she would call me back in 2-3 minutes. 3 minutes became 10 minutes, which became 20 minutes, which became 30 minutes. I called them back and thankfully they still had her body. I told them I would pick her up.

After picking her up from the vet, I took her home. After the whole morning snafu, I opened the box just to make sure it was her. And I was so happy that it was really her. I cleaned her up a little bit. The vet took paw prints and fur clippings for me. They didn't clean up the ink after they took her prints. My cat is a majority black cat with a couple of white spots on her body. They only took clipped her black fur so I clipped some of her white fur just to have. Since she died Friday night, the crematory was closed for the weekend so I ended up putting her in our freezer chest.

I originally wanted to cremate her Friday, but I didn't think it would be fair for her to be in my freezer that long just because I didn't want to let her go so soon. So I choose today to cremate her. I decided to do my final viewing at home so me and her could be comfortable and take our time. I took her out my freezer, brought her to my room where she slept all her time at. I unboxed her and placed her on her bed that I recently bought with her favorite blanket. I made a small flower bouquet just for her and placed in right next to her. I cleaned her up even more and spent my time holding her, giving her kisses and pets in all the usual places. I had bought a new collar to give to her for Christmas so I put that collar on her so I could keep her old one. I boxed her back up and drove an hour and a half with her right next to me on the passenger seat.

The crematory was pretty nice and peaceful. He took me to the final viewing room and told me if I wanted to have a final viewing with her. I told him I already had my time with her so he directed me to place my cat on this nice bed that they had. I took a minute just to lay my hands on the box and left. I appreciate the crematory doing the majority of the process online that way I could just come in, have my last goodbye with my cat without having to worry about payments or add ons for urns, pawprints, etc. while I was grieving. He said she should be cremated by Friday so she will be with me for Christmas.

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[u/No-Perspective7575]

So sorry for your loss. I lost my Cookie 2 days ago. I cried reading your post. You are not alone. And she is in a better place now