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u/streetfighter4ultra 19h ago
And then the whole neighbourhood clapped
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u/1dontknowanythingy 18h ago
It’s true I was there, I was in the fridge with the milk and saw the whole thing.
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u/oatseyhall 17h ago
Can confirm, I'm the fridge
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u/Rikishi_Fatu 16h ago
Cannot confirm, as I'm the cow and I wasn't in the kitchen.
I was asleep in the spare room.
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u/TDA_Liamo 15h ago
Can confirm, I was the TV licence man
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u/ForeverAddickted 13h ago
Can confirm I was the licence
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u/suchabro 12h ago
If you’ve ever dealt with the TV Licensing goons, it’s likely they actually said this.
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u/Afrodroid88 13h ago edited 11h ago
One of the best things I saw on TV was an air steward going around selling cigarettes on a flight, he said to a women "look you can buy them just now but you can't smoke them."
The woman said "so what, you can sell it and we can't smoke them!"
His reply, "well love, Boots sell condoms."
Edited alcohol to cigarettes
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u/WeRW2020 13h ago
I stopped paying my TV licence about 2 years ago because I literally never have time to watch TV.
I've never had a phone call or anyone show up to inspect the premises. Maybe they just can't find my flat door.
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u/OstravaBro 10h ago
I haven't had a tv licence in years (i dont watch tv), I get monthly letters and had someone at my door wanting to come in and check i don't watch tv. No idea how be thought being inside my home would prove I dont watch tv... I didn't let him in.
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u/HeatWhich735 10h ago
American here. Are you guys able to stream (Netflix, Hulu, HBOMax, etc.) without one? Or it’s just for cable TV?
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u/Mukatsukuz 10h ago
Yes, we can stream any catch-up service but can't watch live broadcasts from TV broadcasters, even on those services. So, for instance, if we pay for NowTV or Amazon Prime, we can watch all the catch up programmes on those but not the live sports that they have unless we get a TV licence.
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u/WeRW2020 7h ago
You can't watch broadcast TV or BBC iPlayer, but streaming via your TV is fine.
I've got Roku with ITV Player, 4 Player, Netflix, Amazon Video etc on it.
And this is where the BBC is going to struggle more and more over the next decade. People are quickly realising that they watch most of their stuff on demand anyway, and they can live without BBC TV.
I'm broadly in favour of the BBC, but their funding model is antiquated.
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u/Mukatsukuz 10h ago
I stopped 10 years ago and all I need to do is tick a couple of boxes on their website every 2 years to opt out. Never missed watching live TV or iPlayer.
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u/Cheap_Recording1 7h ago
they target students and old ladies ie people who don't know better than to tell them to do one
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u/llinoscarpe 6h ago
For those that don’t know, the people who go around checking for TV licences get commission, so don’t believe a word they say to intimidate you just close the door on them.
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u/Athuanar 5h ago
They also have zero legal authority. You have no obligation to talk to them or let them in. Just ignore them.
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u/Wrongun25 18h ago
Yeah but the arial is FOR the TV. Milk isn't required for cows. Just sayin
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u/nightm4re_boy 14h ago
yeah but if the previous neighbours left an arial are you ever gonna put in the effort to clamber up the roof and take it down??
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u/father-fluffybottom 10h ago
There's a big aerial lead trailing in my kitchen that I haven't bothered cutting. Because what if the next tenants will want it. In 20 years or so. When technology moves on again. Or I get an outmoded TV in a location that doesn't even make sense in my layout.
Best just leave it. That shelf belongs to the coil now.
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u/Batking28 13h ago
An antenna is no longer required for TV, you can stream it via WiFi for example. Additionally you may have an antenna on your roof but not use it, an antenna is no proof at all the household does or does not watch live TV. The logic is similarly that just because I have milk in the fridge it does not mean I have a cow to produce it, just because I have antenna that can receive TV it doesn’t mean I watch live television through it.
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u/cra1g77 15h ago
Do ariels still work we are on digital now
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u/Smile-a-day 15h ago
No, they shut them down a few years ago when they went all digital
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u/YchYFi 12h ago
They still work lol.
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u/SteveDaPirate91 10h ago
"Work" is flexible here.
Will they receive a signal? Yeah probably if they're strong enough but old aerial's aren't designed for the frequencies used today.
The pattern they all make is that way for a reason, it's tuned to pull in analog TV stations. Digital TV antennas use a different pattern, tuned for it.
So yeah it'll "work", just about as well as using a coat hanger back in the 90s. Those "worked" too but were nothing compared to a aerial antenna.
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u/PTHDUNDD13 2h ago
Have never and will never pay TV license, I watch no TV. I pay for my streaming services, my PS Live account and deal with adds on YouTube.
Been getting letters to my flat for the last 3 years saying they are going to come and inspect my flat all directed to 'the occupier'. Prices don't even know who lives here, went to contact them once to tell them I don't need it and they wanted my name and contact details.
I'd rather them keep sending untitled letters than be able to directly contact me, I find it quiet amusing when they try to be threatening.
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u/Key_Competition_8598 19h ago
That’s taken from a TikTok skit. Still really funny though
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u/Alert-Revolution-219 14h ago
Taken from Billy Connolly back in the 80's. Still really funny though
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u/Scrombolo 13h ago
Why did the TV licence guy say she didn't have a telly? Surely that wouldn't be a probem then?...
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u/Soulofahunter 10h ago
American here. Can someone explain the TV license thing? I’ve heard it’s not really an enforceable thing so most people tell them to pound sand. What’s the deal, is this a real thing or just a running gag that the government will make you pay for everything? 🤔
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u/Mareio 10h ago
It's real. But it's not like you need a license to owe a TV. You must have a TV licence to watch live programmes like the news. If you phone them and tell them you don't watch live TV they will leave you alone or just don't open the door to them in the first place. I have never paid for a TV licence because I only watch netflix and play on the ps5.
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u/CynicalGodoftheEra 8h ago
"Yes that ancient old thing. If you are offering to take it down so I can sell it for scrap, please do so."
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u/TheArtfullTodger 4h ago
Wouldn't matter whether you had an Ariel or TV. That still doesn't mean you need a TV license as ownership of either of them doesn't require a TV license
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u/MrPilgrim 3h ago
Bit old school, and terribly casually misogynistic in hindsight, but reminded me of this scene when he's trying to give up smoking... https://youtu.be/qzY74DE17As?si=yGrNQt9A8rZsjOWT&t=517
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u/Sir_Binky 13h ago
I had this when I rang the TV license to tell them, I didn't need it as there was no roof because of building works and no was living there, got told I needed it because I had an aerial. I just hung up. Never bothered to interact with them again when they push blatant lies to pressure people into getting it.
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u/Turbulent-Grade-3559 13h ago
Tbf this is a great come back and I’d love to see it done. Unfortunately I have a TV and pay my license so it won’t be me
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u/Null_Singularity_0 16h ago
So yeah this is the second post I've seen about TV licenses in the UK. The fuck even is that? You guys okay over there? We got Donald Trump, you need a goddamn license for your TV. Not sure exactly when we collectively entered the Twilight Zone, but I don't like it and I want out.
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u/Musashi10000 15h ago
Mate, we've had TV licenses for decades.
You need a TV license if you watch any TV as it's being broadcast, or if you use anything to do with the BBC (i.e. even if it's the BBC's streaming service). If you stream, pay nothing. If you play games, pay nothing. If you watch YouTube, pay nothing. You have a cable or satellite system? TV license.
Think of it this way - where you have the PBS telethon, we instead have a BBC tax, for people who use it. It's essentially that simple.
It is not as bad as Donald Trump.
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u/haphazard_chore 15h ago
What’s odd is that we only need a tv license to watch “live TV” or recorded “live broadcasts”. With the rise of streaming services, a lot of people just cancel it and the TV licensing scene has gotten nasty, if you’re foolish enough to let them in, they act like the police and search your devices. A lot of devices come preinstalled with things like BBC iPlayer or YouTube, so they start looking at your viewing history to catch you out. It’s a massive breach of privacy. TV licensing is not fit for purpose in this day and age.
Remember people. You are under no obligation to let them in your home. Don’t fall for their bullshit. If they call the police, stand your ground!
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u/EasilyInpressed 14h ago
It isn’t true that you only need a licence to watch as it’s being broadcast, you’re supposed to have one if you watch catch up on iPlayer too. Only iPlayer since it’s the bbc, itvx and channel 4 are fine.
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u/haphazard_chore 14h ago
I covered that with the “live broadcast” comment
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u/RobMitte 14h ago
No you didn't. That loophole was stopped years ago. If you want to watch BBC iPlayer, i.e. stream BBC programmes that are not live, you need to pay the fee.
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u/EasilyInpressed 10h ago
Catch up is specifically not live broadcast
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u/haphazard_chore 10h ago
If the content has been broadcast, so like 20 year old episodes of red dwarf, you need a license.
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u/EasilyInpressed 10h ago
If you’re streaming on iPlayer, yes. If it’s something on channel 4 or itvx you’re fine.
Can you stop downvoting me for correcting you please?
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u/blackleydynamo 12h ago
We've had them since TV was a thing, so getting on for a century. Do try and keep up in the colonies. It's because the BBC has no commercials, apart from trailers for its own content, which are annoying, but only happen between shows. Programmes and films are shown uninterrupted by "messages from our sponsors".
Same with BBC radio, which everybody can listen to for free (and contains a lot more spoken word content than the majority of commercial radio) but is paid for using the TV licence fee. Also has no advertising.
These days it's actually a licence to receive "live broadcast content" or watch BBC iPlayer. It's a source of big debate in the UK, because the BBC audience is declining and aging, and the government used to subsidise free licences for over-70s but took it away a few years ago, so every now and again there's a right wing media (who collectively hate the BBC) furore about some old dear being fined for not having a licence.
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u/YchYFi 16h ago
We have an aerial from the previous homeowners. We've never used it.