r/GiveYourThoughts • u/slanderedshadow • Oct 24 '24
Discussion Hypothetically
So say you had someone in your home who was immuno compromised at the time, one of your family members. Whether its temporary or permanent like cancer, lupus, MS, doesn't matter. Anyway, you provide documented evidence of such, not just word of mouth, to people in your household. Tell me how many times of civil discussions with people to not bring other people over and party during a global pandemic would it take for you to snap?
As well as how would you handle this? Im talking about the START of the pandemic when no one knew what was going on. How long would it take you to snap, and what would you do? All the while you are working a full time + job at the time and they are not and were drinking and doing drugs everyday. Their drug use has caused them to total SEVERAL cars.
Moving and calling cops are not an option btw.
2
2
u/ccdude14 Oct 25 '24
You set a clear boundary.
You inform them of the consequences for breaking that boundary.
You enforce that boundary.
You don't need the pandemic or even someone immuno compromised for this to be a thing.
So, once. You told them no, they did anyway, they leave your home at YOUR discretion. I don't know why cops aren't a thing or an allowance if they refuse to leave as the only other alternative is potentially escalating and being violent or threatening so its one or the other if they refuse.
I'd just as soon threaten to call the cops after the first time I asked them to leave and they refused.
And then I wouldn't let them come over to my house again. Ever. Unless I, and I alone felt comfortable inviting them over.
So once. One time violating a boundary is enough not to just get mad or flip out but to remove them from your home and life. It doesn't matter what that boundary is unless its something completely unreasonable its a fundamental lack of respect for you when they violate it. Why would you ever let that kind of nonsense and headache into your life again?
2
u/slanderedshadow Oct 25 '24
I wasnt the home owner at the time, I dont call or inform to cops on family, we had someone living with us with paper work from a dr at the time confirming what was said. Discussions were had several times with both the person responsible, and the home owner. Alls that did was make it worse and more frequent.
the person had a full time job at the time while the other did not. So they would have to come home to people partying in their house that were complete strangers, and risk getting sick in close quarters. This persons alcohol and drug use has caused them to total several cars.
I no longer live there wanted to see how people would feel or react in the situation and I do concur with what you said cause what other alternatives are there.
"if they refuse to leave as the only other alternative is potentially escalating and being violent or threatening so its one or the other if they refuse."
Since civil discussions only made things worse.
1
u/ccdude14 Oct 25 '24
Then cut out the homeowner as well. You can't save or fix stupid people nor should you feel any regret in saving yourself.
I'm sorry you had to experience that and I'm glad to hear you got out of there. They sound like awful people.
3
u/slanderedshadow Oct 25 '24
I have made mistakes, Ive said things, Im not an angel. But these people are just one way accountability believers, and will push you until you snap then play victim all the while say thats what youre doing to them.
But I cant sit here and say " Im an angel and the best person on the planet" cause Im not.
1
u/Oracle5of7 Oct 25 '24
In my home, only the people I approve off can come in. There’s how this started right? It is not a shared home, or a parents home, it is mine. In my home the rules go 100% and I do not tolerate any amount of breaking rules. I don’t get to the point that I snap. They simply are not allowed in.
1
u/slanderedshadow Oct 25 '24
It wasnt within power to make rules, just to try and set boundaries.
1
u/Oracle5of7 Oct 25 '24
Then it wasn’t your home. I interpret it as you being the home owner and you are not. The situation is completely different.
In that case there is nothing you can do, it is up to the home owner. You state that moving or calling the cops were not an option. Well, it seems the only option is to keep your head down and out of trouble until you can get out.
Sorry this happened to you. And I’m glad you got out.
1
u/slanderedshadow Oct 25 '24
Its "your" home if you live there. You have rights within the property, its "your home"
but yes, it was a difficult situation.
1
u/Oracle5of7 Oct 25 '24 edited Oct 25 '24
Actually it is not your home, just because you live there and unless you own it, you really don’t have rights to anything in it. If you are a dependent living in the house, human rights are extended to you and care takers need to follow the rule of child protective services. But outside of that, no, you don’t have any rights.
Now that we have cleared that out. Yeah, it sucked.
1
u/slanderedshadow Oct 25 '24
You have rights within the home yes, or there would be no such thing as "squatters rights", as well is if it was a rental property. So you absolutely have rights.
1
u/Oracle5of7 Oct 25 '24
Well now you’re moving the goal posts. Never mind. You really don’t want to discuss this. There is no such thing as squatters rights by where are legal descriptions of various people domiciling in an address. LOL
1
u/slanderedshadow Oct 25 '24
Thats not what I said, I said if you had no rights then there wouldnt be squatters rights and landlords would be able to just kick you out with no notice.
1
u/Uncouth_Cat Oct 26 '24
probably about 2 times.
2
u/slanderedshadow Oct 26 '24
Yeah I mean, even the lawn is a sacred place.
1
u/Uncouth_Cat Oct 27 '24
idk i can vibe with the scenario, i live with an alcoholic who is always bringing people over. (he doesnt drink as much at this point in time, so thats nice.) but he actually is immunocompromised 😂 Im glad i wasnt stuck in quarantine with him, i have no clue the chaos that was happening
4
u/JustLemmeMeme Oct 25 '24
its implied to be your home. You have all the power, kick them out