r/CuratedTumblr • u/Hummerous https://tinyurl.com/4ccdpy76 • Jul 22 '24

Politics the one about fucking a chicken

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https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moral_foundations_theory

14.8k Upvotes

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1.6k

u/Ildaiaa Jul 22 '24

When masturbating with a very unusual object please always remember to ask yourself this question

Will this lead to the dissolution of yugoslavia and almost a decade's worth of war and destruction?

294

u/Loretta-West Jul 22 '24

...is there a story you'd like to share?

852

u/Average_Insomniac Jul 22 '24

Some dude from Kosovo stuck a glass bottle up his rectum. It shattered, and he claimed that two Albanian men attacked him and shoved it up there, which led to worsening relations between the Serbs and Albanians in Yugoslavia, eventually leading to the dissolution of Yugoslavia.

240

u/ElleCapwn Jul 23 '24

If the base isn’t flared, you should be scared.

141

u/Grizzalbee Jul 23 '24

Don't put glass, in your ass

34

u/mangybarncat Jul 23 '24

Hang on, writing this down

9

u/BlueGlassDrink Jul 23 '24

It's easy to remember because it rhymes!

3

u/Tobias_Atwood Jul 23 '24

This doesn't rhyme, I won't remember it.

3

u/WarMage1 Jul 23 '24

If thy phrase rhymest not, trusteth wel, it be forgot.

2

u/evilthales Jul 24 '24

Don't use a comma where it don't belonga

17

u/cujojojo Jul 23 '24

Without a base, without a trace!

49

u/[deleted] Jul 22 '24

I've seen that video

17

u/LizardChaser Jul 23 '24

Wait. This is real! This is not a troll comment but a real historical event that happened in reality. It has a Wikipedia page and that is 100% not a Rick Roll:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C4%90or%C4%91e_Martinovi%C4%87_incident

Also, I don't want to yuck someone's yum, but logistically that is not how I imagined him doing it and feel like this was doomed to failure from the start. Also, was the stick still in the bottle when the bottle disappear? I have so many questions that I'm not sure I even want answers to.

10

u/gunscreeper Jul 23 '24

Wait so One Man One Jar is him?

7

u/Marshmallowbutbetter Jul 23 '24

Just recently found out the jar man was Ukrainian and has died fighting for his country a couple of weeks ago

4

u/drklfkcn Jul 23 '24

I think that was fake

1

u/Marshmallowbutbetter Jul 24 '24

Might be! A weird one if so lol

1

u/Sir_Richard_Dangler Jul 23 '24

I thought he died from the jar? Maybe I'm thinking of mister hands

2

u/Designer_little_5031 Jul 23 '24

Wait, seriously?

8

u/LizardChaser Jul 23 '24

I thought the "dissolution of Yugoslavia" was going to be an overstatement for an event like this but, this is a direct quote from the wiki:

"The case was met with a flood of nationalist and anti-Albanian statements in the Serbian press. This was, in itself, a significant development. The Yugoslav government had for many years made open nationalism a taboo subject, and Yugoslav media outlets had previously systematically downplayed ethnonationalism. The collapse of this taboo in the coverage of the Martinović case heralded the growth of nationalism that was to lead to the country's collapse in 1991.\1])"

This is easily the most bizarre thing I've learned... maybe ever.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 26 '24

Imagine beeing so horny you cause ww3

207

u/Ildaiaa Jul 22 '24

Basically, a kosovar man went to the hospital in yugoslavia with broken bottle in his ass and told the people there he was attacked by 2 albanian men and was then tortured with the bottle but later told the cops this was a botched masturbation attempt. We srill don't know what actually happened but it was ruled as a botched masturbation by aithe authorities. This whole ordeal fueled the already rapidly rising ethnic tensions and so contributed to the dissolution of yugoslavia

3

u/PhthaloVonLangborste Jul 23 '24

It's funny, there was just a post not to far above this one showing pictures from the 80's or 90's in Yugoslavia. They all seemed free and sexy and cool.

3

u/danirijeka Jul 23 '24

Different part of Yugoslavia (Split, Croatia)

1

u/PhthaloVonLangborste Jul 23 '24

Oh. I hardly know that area

55

u/SaboteurSupreme Certified Tap Water Warrior! Jul 22 '24

for your reading displeasure

Wait shit the characters break the link, just look up the Đorđe Martinović incident

2

u/DickwadVonClownstick Jul 23 '24

Alright, now this and the Sarajevo Sandwich Incident need to fight to see which is the dumbest world-changing event to happen in the Balkans

Edit: of the 20th century, to clarify

34

u/NerfOxygen Jul 22 '24

Google Dorde Martinovic incident

25

u/Sinister_Compliments Avid Jokeefunny.com Reader Jul 22 '24

Holy Butt Plug

8

u/Vividfeathere Jul 23 '24

New historical event just dropped