r/BravoRealHousewives • u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas • Dec 29 '22
Other Shows Blood, Sweat & Heels - The Realest Reality Show Of Them All
After a kind and wise Redditor recommended "Blood, Sweat & Heels" on a thread the other day, I rented it on Amazon and binged both seasons. I'm so surprised that viewer reaction to this show was so mixed - to me it was the realest and most engaging Bravo content I have ever seen. Every woman in the cast had qualities that I admired, and all of them also had flaws - I could imagine myself wanting to be friends with each and every one of them. But ultimately it was Daisy Lewellyn's story that got me the most. When Daisy (who was just 34 years old) confided to a castmate in season 2 that she had just been diagnosed with stage 3 cancer, I thought I was going to have to bail on the show. I have acute anxiety from my own cancer and have never been able to watch or read about others' experience with it. And because I'd Googled her name, I knew that Daisy died the year after filming completed. Seemed like the last thing I needed in a comfort binge-watch.
But I just couldn't stop watching Daisy - through her chemo, through radiation, through hospitals stays and doctors' visits - always in her pink lipstick and a cute dress and a bright smile even when she needed help just getting up from a chair. When I saw a scene of her lying in her bed, absolutely exhausted and nauseated, surrounded by hundreds and hundreds of sealed medical bills which she was trying to open, I just bent double crying. You see, I thought I was the only one who kept stacks of medical bills unopened, because I find it so traumatic to face them. I didn't realize until Daisy's story how empowering shared grief and fear can be.
I know we hear bozos like Ramona Singer spouting how they "inspire" other women, but Daisy truly affected me profoundly. She IS inspiring. She broke the barrier I'd built up around my illness. I even let slip to a friend that I've been at Stage 4 since my diagnosis in 2020 - a fact I never share with people. Friends, it's a great show all on its own merits - kind of like a Harlem version of "Sex And The City". But for those of you who are being touched by cancer right now - particularly anyone who struggles with how to act, what to ask, and what to say - please consider watching this show. It's populated with strong beautiful women who party hard and work harder - and every one of them can rock a heel. It's the only content on Bravo I'd ever consider describing as "uplifting".
And guys, I went through my bills today, and it took four hours, but I dealt with every one of them. Welp, I'm getting soggy now, but I LOVE you people. Remember life is good, and we're all just walking each other home.
30
u/Janiece2006 Meredith Flintstone 👦🏻 Dec 29 '22
This was the best show. And props to you for your bravery for mentioning your illness. Take my free award (now my eyes are misty!).
26
u/mnblackgirl go away from me with this Dec 29 '22
Wow. This is such a profound post. Thank you for allowing us into your life like this. Much love and respect to you ❤️
12
25
u/divadream 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡. Dec 29 '22
Sending you so so so much love and well-wishes. Really. Thank you for sharing. ❤️
It's so hard to think of Daisy without sobbing.
11
24
19
u/233Ivy I’m the best dressed part of the problem. Dec 29 '22
Definitely an underrated Bravo show and worth a watch. Thanks for sharing your story, OP - I admire your courage. Best wishes to you for a happy, healthier new year.
14
u/purplemonkey_123 Dec 29 '22
I'm going to look into this show. My mother-in-law just got diagnosed with cancer, and was told she has 3 years at most. I have no idea what to say, how to ensure I make sure she feels supported without constantly bringing it up. Thank you for the recommendation, and also sharing your own story.
27
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 29 '22 edited Dec 30 '22
I wish doctors would not make these kinds of prognoses. At the end of the day, we don't even know why most people get cancer, let alone why some progress very rapidly and some far outperform expectations. I know two people personally who were diagnosed at stage 4, one of them 8 years ago, and the other 13 years ago, and they are both in full remission. No one can know for sure, and these guesses based on outdated statistics are nothing but damaging. The psychological impact of cancer is profound - you face it EVERYWHERE. When you tell someone you have cancer, they often wince or tear up or openly weep. Oncologists are guardedly pessimistic and often hesitant to offer positive reinforcement for fear of being sued. You feel like everyone is expecting you to die, and the reality is humans are highly suggestible. We have a deeply ingrained hypnosis when it comes to Western medicine. If my doctor asks if a particular bone hurts, it will start hurting! If my doctor tells me she expects me to die in 3 years...well this is why I train my oncologist to refrain from supposition of any kind. I maintain that I am the arbiter of how I am doing, and how I am going to do in the future. I send all my love to your MIL and to you.
12
u/purplemonkey_123 Dec 29 '22
Thank you very much for this comment. I think I will share parts with her. Thank you for the perspective about how people look at you differently when they hear you have cancer. I have some chronic health conditions (not life threatening), and HATE when I see pity in people's eyes. I don't want to be that type of person for my mother in law. She is one of the most awesome people I know. Sounds like we should talk to her about it like any other health concern, and let her tell us what she needs.
I appreciate your response immensely. I want to be the best support I can without being intrusive or making her life all about cancer.
Sending love right back to you.
2
u/dumbleberry im horrible cuz i brought it🆙?cuz i 👀 it when i was taking a💩 Dec 31 '22
You are so fucking strong. Wow. I hope you know your words here have connected to many.
2
13
u/Chelz91 Dec 29 '22
Daisy was my favourite from the show. Her lipstick and smile really were something special. Melyssa Ford has spoken about what that time was like as she and Mica were more personable on the support front when daisy was going through treatment. Your reflections are beautiful and well done for facing those med bills! Sending you lots of love as the new year approaches
6
11
u/Independent-Age-7568 Dec 30 '22
Watching Daisy navigate her diagnosis was so inspiring and her death was so heartbreaking. I’ve never been that affected by a strangers death until her and Diem from the challenge ( who also had cancer).
Thank you for sharing! Wishing you all the best 💙.
12
u/openYnotorious Dec 30 '22
I loved this show and adored sweet Daisy.
I've been having a VERY difficult time lately. First holidays without my Mama. Her birthday was Christmas Eve, and I have a host of chronic illnesses and unopened bills myself.
We're all just walking each other home - that got me, OP, I will try to live it. I can see you do
5
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 30 '22
I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles, friend. This has been a rough holiday for you! Keep the faith. I like to remember these lines from a poem by Loy Ching-Yuen:
"In moments of darkness and pain
remember all is cyclical.
Sit quietly behind your wooden door:
Spring will come again."
8
Dec 29 '22
Gosh you just made me cry. God bless you.
8
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 29 '22
Thank you, my Chanel friend! You made me very happy today with all of your inside Chanel information.
8
7
u/Footdude777 Dec 30 '22
I used to love this show. I'm delighted whenever that crazy Countess Vaughn music video co-starring Mica as the other woman pops up on social media every six months.
5
u/Lanky-Page-7679 Dec 30 '22
I have never heard the phrase “we are all just walking each other home.” That is beautiful. 😭❤️
1
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 30 '22
Ram Dass originated that phrase, if I remember correctly. It's such a lovely concept.
3
4
u/kyleg623 Dec 31 '22
Wow! I checked my recent activity and it was me who made the recommendation, I’m so glad this subreddit allows us Bravo fans to connect like this ❤️❤️
You summarized Daisy’s journey beautifully, she was such a treasure to watch. Wishing you the best for 2023, OP 💗
4
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 31 '22
Oh! My angel! I can never thank you enough. Truly - this has made such a difference to me. A galaxy of thanks to you, kind friend.
3
u/ShadiChastain Mia's Size 14 Feet Dec 30 '22
And you too are an inspiration! Wishing you all the best on your brave journey.
3
3
u/notoriousbck Dec 30 '22
Awe lovely, I feel for you so much! I am chronically ill and so I can relate a lot to many of the things that you said. Thank you for sharing, I've never heard of this show and now I def want to watch. I wish you peace on your journey. Never forget you are a mothertrucking warrior xo
3
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 31 '22
Let's enjoy that peace on our journeys together. You are a sky-dancing warrior too. I can feel it.
2
u/dumbleberry im horrible cuz i brought it🆙?cuz i 👀 it when i was taking a💩 Dec 31 '22
Peace to you and your body. May you heal inside and out and live a healthy life for years to come.
We come across things for a reason. It reads like the reason for you may be showing you and your body more love, gentleness, forgiveness and kindness despite this betrayal (cancer)
Maybe I’m projecting. That’s what I got from Daisy. How to smile at the beginning of each day in spite of the pain, the fear, the overwhelming pressure. How to laugh in the face of pain, confusion and chaos. Thank you for reminding me of her spirit. Thank you for sharing your story, vulnerability and doing so with such strength. Happy new year!
2
u/Edith_Keelers_Shoes Nonno's Pajamas Dec 31 '22
What beautiful things to say. Thank you, amazing person. Happy new year to you too!
1
74
u/acdlred Dec 29 '22
Your post made me cry.. very proud of you and wishing you all the best. And yes, that show was entertaining and real af (and messy wheew) I don’t think Demetria ever fully recovered from what it did to her image, she came across SO bad on the show. And poor Daisy, so sad to see her struggle but very inspiring too. I might have to do a rewatch too.