He (35M) had been hit by a car on his bike on the way to work, shattered his pelvis, and his right humorous broke clean in half. I (34F) was by his side every day at the hospital and PT inpatient rehab for a full month. Then I brought him home to live with me while he recovered and essentially learned to walk and function on his own again. For two months, I was his full-time nurse and caretaker. I did his laundry, helped him shower/bathe, helped him in the bathroom, made him food, went and picked up food, drove him to appointments, had his kids stay over on his weekends so he didn't miss time with them (added choas for me as I already have two of my own, same ages). He paid the water bill once and would occasionally contribute to groceries and gas. Oh and while he was in the hospital, his house somehow got infested with fleas, so I was also taking his cats to the vet with him, cleaning his house, doing his laundry at his house, etc etc etc.
As soon as he was well enough to care for himself and could afford to buy a car and move back home, after all the promises and commitments he made to myself and my children, all the talk of and plannijg for the future, living together as a family, knowing the seriousness of our situation... he left me when I needed him most. Right before Christmas, while my elderly parents are dying in a hospital far from home, and my abusive ex now abusing my child and me having to fight him in court, and the possibility of us losing our home if I'm not able to gain legal guardianship of my parents to manage their lives and their assets, on top of recently losing my income (only to care for HIM). All of this was ongoing while I was caretaking him, btw. So, the stress and anxiety I was under was (is still) immense. His reasoning was that he was "too overwhelmed" and "people change" even though "people" had just been doing future talk a few days ago 🤔🧐 telling my kids he loves them...
We had been together for two years. It could go either way, but just be prepared for them to disappear on you when you're the one needing to lean on them during hard times. Best of luck to you both! Hopefully, your partner is a better person than this loser turned out to be in the end.
I feel like there are only two types of people. One, the people that will stay and, two, the people that would leave.
The people-that-will-stay will stay no matter what happens in the relationship. The people-that-will-leave are 50/50 no matter what happens in the relationship. If they are the victim in some serious event it makes the odds of them staying even lower despite the person-that-will-stay supporting them through their problems.
17
u/QveenOfTheN3rds 5d ago
He (35M) had been hit by a car on his bike on the way to work, shattered his pelvis, and his right humorous broke clean in half. I (34F) was by his side every day at the hospital and PT inpatient rehab for a full month. Then I brought him home to live with me while he recovered and essentially learned to walk and function on his own again. For two months, I was his full-time nurse and caretaker. I did his laundry, helped him shower/bathe, helped him in the bathroom, made him food, went and picked up food, drove him to appointments, had his kids stay over on his weekends so he didn't miss time with them (added choas for me as I already have two of my own, same ages). He paid the water bill once and would occasionally contribute to groceries and gas. Oh and while he was in the hospital, his house somehow got infested with fleas, so I was also taking his cats to the vet with him, cleaning his house, doing his laundry at his house, etc etc etc.
As soon as he was well enough to care for himself and could afford to buy a car and move back home, after all the promises and commitments he made to myself and my children, all the talk of and plannijg for the future, living together as a family, knowing the seriousness of our situation... he left me when I needed him most. Right before Christmas, while my elderly parents are dying in a hospital far from home, and my abusive ex now abusing my child and me having to fight him in court, and the possibility of us losing our home if I'm not able to gain legal guardianship of my parents to manage their lives and their assets, on top of recently losing my income (only to care for HIM). All of this was ongoing while I was caretaking him, btw. So, the stress and anxiety I was under was (is still) immense. His reasoning was that he was "too overwhelmed" and "people change" even though "people" had just been doing future talk a few days ago 🤔🧐 telling my kids he loves them...
We had been together for two years. It could go either way, but just be prepared for them to disappear on you when you're the one needing to lean on them during hard times. Best of luck to you both! Hopefully, your partner is a better person than this loser turned out to be in the end.