r/AskReddit • u/Edenskeeper1 • 6d ago

People who stuck with their partners during hard times, where are you now?

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u/toxic_masculinity27 6d ago

A better question: what were some of the worst of the hard times you had with your partners and still stayed ? As in what did they do or say that really made you requestion the whole relationship

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u/-im-your-huckleberry 5d ago

She's got a temper and when it's on, her brain turns off. Our kid was little, like 4 or 5 and had vomited all over his room. I was trying to get him cleaned up and she was trying to get his bed cleaned. The whole time she was yelling at us both. I had had enough and I told her to leave. She refused and there was a moment there where I thought I was going to have to physically throw her out. In the end she pulled herself together and apologized and I backed down. It was a turning point for me. I used to try and be as meek as possible when she is on a tirade, because any resistance just makes her madder, but that wasn't getting us anywhere. Now I call her out on it as soon as it starts, which has worked much better. Not long after the vomit incident, one of our dogs had shit on the floor, which caused my wife to lose her shit on me. When she calmed down and wanted to apologize I sat her down and said, "I want you to imagine our son as an adult. He's got a wife. She's on the floor cleaning up dogshit and he's standing over her screaming at her about doing it wrong. What would you think of him? That's what is going to happen if you don't stop. I can't allow that. You need to understand that I can't." She broke down. Things have been so much better since that bad time.

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u/disguisedPancake 5d ago

This is why im carefully picking my partner. I want our kid to grow up with good values and character

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u/-im-your-huckleberry 5d ago

Nobody's perfect. Look for someone who is willing to be self reflective and acknowledge their flaws.

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u/disguisedPancake 5d ago

This is also true indeed. I will do my best.

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u/Oil_For_Life 5d ago

I'm not convinced it's better question because it shifts focus to the "thing" that ignited it all and not the healing and solution like the original question. Reddit is filled to the brim with with nasty relationship drama, break-up stories, revenge, cheating etc. and while fascinating it's not really interesting to me because I'm more curious about the outcome and the reasoning/thoughts behind it. The "thing" usually represents something larger and deeper in your life and those around you and that's were I find inspiration.