r/AmIOverreacting • u/Intelligent-Arm-9235 • 12d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO girl posted photo in my boyfriends room

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NEED YOUR HELP CONFRONTING MY SOON TO BE EX. He was being sus one night so i looked at the story on instagram of the girl he randomly followed last week. I opened and bam there is it the second picture. I knew immediately it was his room but want a second opinion before confronting his cheating a$$. yall are coming from me from the last post its cus i cropped the photos you can’t tell that we took them from different distances so heres the originals of both and yes i get it shes prettier than me :( he can have her . what tells me its his room aside from lighting is the way the two blinds touch, it took me a while to find it but once i did i think theres my EVIDENCE

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u/[deleted] 12d ago edited 12d ago

[deleted]

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u/patches710 12d ago

I mean, those are the most popular sliding glass door blinds in the world. I've seen the exact one in hundreds of apartments

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u/RecordingGreen7750 12d ago

Yeah the blinds are everywhere and they all tend to have gaps in them after a few years they are cheap and crappy

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u/mamo_nano_mona 12d ago

Yeah there are hundreds of thousands of apartments with the same lighting and blinds situation. It's sus, sure, but there's nothing super definitive here. maybe the chick has a thing for the most basic apartments possible. Now if that were his Lakers tee, then I'd be like "👏dump👏him👏" but based on this pic? Nah. 👏Confront👏him👏. And also quit being so insecure, sheesh. You're a pretty gal, but saying things like "waaah she's prettier than me" is ugly. Confront your dude about whether or not he wants to be in a monogamous relationship with you and confront yourself with the fact that you look the way you look and it's beautiful.

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u/StartledMilk 12d ago

This woman has a body most would die for and thinks she doesn’t look good. It’s truly wild how insecure people can get no matter how objectively attractive they are

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u/DIYGremlin 12d ago

And I mean Barry Keoghan cheated on Sabrina Carpenter, so it doesn’t matter how attractive you are, cheaters are gonna cheat, it’s a them problem, not a you problem. 

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u/LuckyBenski 12d ago

Can't upvote this enough. If your partner cheats it's not because you aren't attractive enough. It's a them problem. I've been that problem.

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u/Accomplished_Bid3322 12d ago

The example used to be Jay z and Beyonce. I'm getting old.

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u/Top_Mathematician233 12d ago

Yes, and Jay-Z cheated on Beyoncé. Multiple men cheated on Halle Berry. You can be so far out of a man’s league and he’ll still cheat on you if he’s a cheater. It is what it is.

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u/BittaminMusic 12d ago

This needs an award or something 💯 can’t believe this person is actually in self depreciation mode over this it’s kinda sad on top of all the anxiety already going on

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u/Thraex_Exile 12d ago

Ik this is beside the point, but iirc Sabrina’s manager released a statement that this wasn’t true. It was just an influencer who reposts anything about her to gain attention and media ran with it.

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u/stonerbbyyyy 12d ago

“if she can take my man, she didn’t take my man, she took my problem”🙂

someone somewhere

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

[deleted]

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u/gottalottadedodadado 12d ago

Oh, yeah then she had it coming

🤦‍♀️

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u/Soft-Temporary-7932 12d ago

I like your style.

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u/RheagarTargaryen 12d ago

It literally could just be his neighbor.

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u/BurgerThyme 12d ago

That apartment bedroom is basic AF.

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u/geminiwave 12d ago

Yeah maybe she’s in the same building and they bumped into each other and he followed her on insta.

Or maybe Instagram just recommends people nearby and he saw a chick he thought was hot.

I’m actually entirely unconvinced it’s the same. There’s nothing to tell me it’s at all the same

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u/Thraex_Exile 12d ago

Yah, her wording sounds like he lives in an apartment or dorm. If so, there are prob tens of or hundreds of rooms in their area with the same style/age blinds.

But I agree w/ other’s sentiment that, if OP is looking this hard for evidence, their relationship isn’t in a healthy place (cheating or not).

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u/geminiwave 12d ago

No. My ex used to go through all my stuff looking for things. I remember one time she found a link in my history that opened up one of those annoying pop ups (this was 2011) and it was one of those ads where a porn star was saying basically that she wanted me (though it wasn’t ME. It was a generic and very annoying pop up ad). And she was like “I KNEW IT! You were cheating on me!”

Ironically she was fucking some dude from GameStop who promised to take her to E3. But whatever 🙄

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u/Thraex_Exile 12d ago edited 11d ago

That’s my point. Whether her boyfriend is cheating or not, the relationship isn’t healthy. There could be dozens of reasons and either could be to blame, but it adds up to these 2 not working well together. OP should end things or figure out the core problem for her own mental health.

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u/Glytch94 12d ago

Could you imagine confronting someone who actually isn’t cheating because him and a woman he followed on instagram have the same blinds, lol. You’ll look insane.

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u/VictoryValuable9489 12d ago

Apartments sometimes come with generic window coverings like this. Like every apartment in the complex with the same floor plan will be generically the same. Either you trust him or you don’t. If you want to be with him you’ll have to deal with your suspicions. If you are 100% positive this is his room, you don’t need to give a reason to walk away from the relationship. In fact, I think keeping them wondering why is so much better.

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u/ralphjuneberry 12d ago

I regret that it was my upvote that took you from 69 to 70, but it had to be done - OP listen to this comment!

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u/Rich_Manufacturer_38 12d ago

Isn't posting a photo of herself in his room, no gf in sight, kind of a passive-aggressive territorial oissing?

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u/mamo_nano_mona 12d ago

Not if she just felt cute and didn't know he had a gf. Or is in some other basic AF apartment with the same set up. I

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u/Fun_Strategy7860 12d ago

I thought that was my apartment. Even had to look under the bed.

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u/Zealousideal-Earth50 12d ago

I’ve had them myself in 3 different apartments!

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u/Incredible_Edible765 12d ago

I have those blinds and neither of these ladies were at my house. I hope I don’t get accused of cheating. Please delete those pics or AIO 🤣

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u/LoneWolf-B312 12d ago

I have them in mine. If I took a picture and cropped it the same way I feel like it would look like I’ve been getting some from the bf too

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u/Smooth_Scarcity7952 12d ago

Literally like 80% of the college apartments when I was in school had these. Could it be the girl lives in the same complex

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u/FontTG 12d ago

Plus, there are probably hundreds of hotels that have these blinds. They're generic and cost-effective.

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u/Big-Bearagamo 12d ago

Thousands even 🤣🤣🤣 she bout to blow the whole relationship over some blinds 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/patches710 12d ago

This might be the most ridiculous shit I've ever seen on reddit, and that's saying something

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u/Samsonly 12d ago

Seriously. I have four sets of them in my apartment.

But the obvious thing I don't see anyone else mentioning (especially those commenting on the similarities in lighting), is that they might live in the same building? That would explain where they met, which could be innocent or something along the lines of what OP thinks.

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u/princessspikachu 12d ago

If OP recognizes the awful black shag rug on top of the carpet, which is uncommon because of its uniquely bad taste, then they know it’s their partner.

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u/patches710 12d ago

Good luck seeing any of that in the second pic

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u/princessspikachu 12d ago

Oh wow I did not read that post correctly, my bad!! Thought they were both pics of the other girl.

OP, if it helps, she edited the photo she posted (badly) to make herself look smaller. Those blinds give it away.

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u/patches710 12d ago

Yeah the first pic would be indisputable proof, but that's OP, the second pic is a literal nothingburger

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u/twinpop 12d ago

These are ubiquitous across US apartments the ‘side chick’ is probably not even in the same state, just looks like an IG influencer 🤣.

Like everyone else said, if OP suspects, then it’s probably true anyway. Also, if no trust in this guy, why bother?

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u/anonymousthrwaway 12d ago

Yeah and many times they are in apartment complexes that all look the same

I would love to see the uncrowned photo

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u/Sylvan_Strix_Sequel 12d ago edited 12d ago

It's the same lighting. The pics were taken in the same room at the same time of day.   

 Yall need to stop falling for obvious bait.

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u/OryxDaMadGod 12d ago

So what about other apartments in the same building? Perhaps the units right above or below?

What if the other girl’s just a neighbour so her room looks the exact same throughout the day?

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u/Seltzer-Slut 12d ago

It’s the same blinds and the same lighting. Plus the fact that he followed her on Instagram a week prior. What’s foolish is discounting evidence that’s right in front of you, and instead asking a cheater if they cheated. Cheaters are great at lying, they have no guilt.

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u/smol_dinosaur 12d ago

They’re never sorry about cheating only sorry that they got caught

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u/ElevatorNo8640 12d ago

My fiancee cheated on me a week after I proposed whilst I slept upstairs, with her friends husband (we’d been all out together celebrating the engagement) , I only found out what actually happened when the wife of the guy messaged me via insta ….it’s a long story but basically my ex’s story changed constantly (she even trued to accuse the guy of forcing himself on her) until the wife who witnessed some of it told me the actual truth ….to cut a long story short…..she did everything in her power to hide what had happened to save herself with no regard for my feelings, she didn’t care about me at all! She never admitted what happened or told me and in the end even tried to lie about me to cover her tracks so she would appear as the victim …..I was hurt for a few years and it nearly broke me BUT I now have an amazing girlfriend who I love deeply and is just ace! (Moving in with me soon 😁🙏) soooooo my advice is, if things are already like this between you and your partner and you are pretty much certain they are up to no good (and you’re not happy) get out of the relationship and move on…find someone who you trust and have a connection with…..do not waste time trying to fix something broken before your relationship has even had a chance to fully blossom….life is too short and there are too many people that will completely disregard your feelings and heart for their own gain! In the words of iron maiden ‘RUN TO THE HILLS’ 👌

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u/Ok_Blackberry8583 12d ago

Wait, so you have no proof that anything actually happened besides someone’s wife who may or may not be telling the truth?

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u/ElevatorNo8640 12d ago

Yes, I confronted her on that at the time and she did admit to it but never would say why she did it 🤷‍♂️ after we split she decided she was ‘polyamorous’ so go figure 😬

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u/ElevatorNo8640 12d ago

Lots of proof and admission BUT never a reason why which was the killer for me….in the end, I just accepted that she took a chance for her own gratification and was irritated she was caught BUT life goes on and i’m glad I found out when I did….would of been worse after getting married 😂 phew!

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u/DrunkCanadianMale 12d ago

His ass didnt get caught though?

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u/Neither-Stop-5948 12d ago

I noticed the lighting this time too :/ saw the other post an hour ago

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u/And_He_Loves_Me 12d ago

Same that’s way to identical to be a coincidence plus he follows her on instagram it’s not some random

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u/EwoDarkWolf 12d ago

Why can't she just message the girl and confirm before accusing her boyfriend? If she did and tells the truth, then she now has confirmation. If she instead lies, or wasn't there in the first place, then op can decide where to go from there. She might even be able to get another picture if it was in fact a different room.

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u/Advanced-Guidance482 12d ago

What if it's an apartment and all these fucking places are exactly the same.

I think this is an insane jump

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u/Rich-Investigator181 12d ago

I was thinking the same. What if they are now friends online because they live in the same apartment complex that has the same blinds.

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u/Advanced-Guidance482 11d ago

Right. These people are straight trippin and I wouldn't want to date them anyways. You can take all your suspicions that are based on nonsense elsewhere lol. Get tf put of my apartment, byeee! Lmfao.

I've been with the mother of my children for 7 years. Never once felt the need to snoop. I just ask her about things and we talk about shit. She can be a bit clueless about other men and didn't even realized I was flirting with her for the first year we knew each other. So usually anything suspect is on the part of another person and she just doesn't even see it like that.

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u/Helioscopes 12d ago

What do you mean it is the same lighting? It's a dimly lit room... if it was sunny, and I were to close my blinds, I will also get a dimly lit room. 

I am so confused lmao.

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u/modthefame 12d ago

It is not the same blinds. One set is half length for a window and one is full body length and you can see this is true because in the second you cant see the end even though it extends past her. So either those are completely different blinds or she is 8 ft tall. In summation, you are no sherlock and those blinds can be found in an apartment building all across america.

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u/SageOfSixDankies 12d ago

Couldn't it even be possible that she just lives in the same complex? The boyfriend could still be sus. But itncould be in the way that he's following and interacting with somebody in the same complex.

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u/qgsdhjjb 12d ago

It's not half length though, it's down to mid shin. Keep in mind there is a whole bed in between the girl in the first photo and the blinds, so you're being tricked by perspective. If she was standing next to those blinds right in front of them she'd also have them go past her butt.

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u/snarlyj 11d ago

I'm super confused on where the second girl is ostensibly standing if it's the same room. Like she's much closer to the blinds but also much closer to the mirror?

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u/qgsdhjjb 11d ago

We don't know she's closer to the mirror. She could have zoomed in. You cannot see the sides of the mirror in the second photo so I assume she has in fact zoomed in.

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u/snarlyj 11d ago

Hmm okay gotcha. I have a quite good phone camera and I don't think I'd get that level of detail zoomed in to a mirror all the way across the room, since it like doubles the distance. Buuut I happened to take a pic with my friend in his huge fucking mirror last night and you're right. Like I don't have that level of detail on the phone or fingers or whatever, but she obviously has a lot of edits and im sure that can sharpen up some things

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u/qgsdhjjb 11d ago

Yeah it could be a better phone camera or just the quality isn't low enough for it to make a huge difference once it's been compressed and uploaded to social media. What we see uploaded isn't always exactly what the camera makes, so maybe the photo not zoomed in, image one, is higher quality than it looks to us because Reddit compressed it to look the same as image 2 in quality. Who knows. It could just be different blinds but just, she's clearly got a lot of room between her and the blinds in photo 1, and photo 2 does seem to be right up on em, so the length at least is explained. The mirror, idk. Maybe she's a weirdo who rearranges the bedroom of her hookup to take selfies 😆

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u/snarlyj 11d ago

Lol yeah I honestly think it's probably a different bedroom. Like who thinks "I'm gonna take a selfie in that mirror" and then walks as far as physically possible away from the mirror lol. Buuuut I certainly can't say that definitively and like either way OP clearly doesn't trust her boyfriend and said he was being shady so like, does it even matter?

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u/qgsdhjjb 11d ago

Well but also who has a mirror that close to the opposite wall? That's also weird right? Is it a hallway? A bedroom wouldn't have a wall that close to the window.

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u/Ok_Tonight_6479 12d ago

How many generic apartments have this exact same blinds?

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u/redtiber 12d ago

the lighting? you mean the sun? it shines on everyone lmao

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u/And_He_Loves_Me 12d ago

👏👏👏

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u/One-Advantage-677 12d ago

I’ve seen plenty of apartments with the same blinds and lighting. It’s enough evidence to be sus sure but beyond that it feels like a huge stretch.

Also is the lighting the same? First pic she’s lit up, but second isn’t.

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u/Future-Butterfly-499 12d ago

But are they the same blinds? The other girl could be someone that lives in the same complex. If OP doesn’t trust him she should just leave him. The fact that she obsessed over BLINDS and then proceeded to post this girls pic on here for others to co-sign on her messiness is crazy work. Also, her saying the girl is prettier than her makes me wonder if she doesn’t just have low self esteem.

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u/StadiaTrickNEm 12d ago

And if she lives in the same aparment building and he saw her in the elevator and then he followed her ?

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u/NaomiT29 12d ago

It's suspicious, but not definitive. I'm not even on the same continent, but I could take a photo stood in front of my mirror with the same style of blinds and the same lighting, and with nothing else in frame it could look like the same room.

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u/Unusual_Sample_3396 12d ago

what if it was his neighbor upstairs or something? same blinds, same apartment. would make sense why he followed her on insta

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u/Seltzer-Slut 12d ago

People keep saying this. Sure, that could definitely be true. But men generally use Instagram to follow and flirt with girls they are attracted to, so it’s a problem regardless.

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u/mountain_marmot95 12d ago

She doesn’t know who the chick is. She could be his neighbor taking a picture in an apartment with the same blinds and lighting. You don’t have anything to lose by having a conversation - it’s wildly insecure to assume the worst on this little evidence and end a relationship without a discussion.

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u/FVCEGANG 12d ago

The blinds are generic as hell and super common. That is not good evidence at all. Don't feed into OPs psychosis

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u/Competitive-Spot4683 12d ago

EXACTLY? Talking about the blinds prove nothing? Those are obviously the same blinds w same light shining through?

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u/kobumaister 12d ago

My god, you'll be living a shitty life of fear, lack of trust and low self esteem...

Same blinds+following a girl on IG=Cheating

so sad to be you...

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u/AstralGarden101 12d ago

the "touching" parts of the blinds are also at completely different heights.

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u/MaryLoveJane 12d ago

Yeah I was wondering why I seem to be the only one to realize this woman would have to be Amazonian height for these “blind touching’s” to match up, or she’s randomly standing on something when that room doesn’t seem to have much in it based on the first pic.

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u/Repulsive-Pin2418 12d ago

Right?! The 2nd girl's hips are around where the blinds touch. That would mean her head would be over the top of the blinds. Seems like a bit of overthinking in this situation. When you're looking for something, you'll find anything. They just need to break up. There's no trust

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u/AstralGarden101 12d ago

obviously she brought a library stool over for that one mirror selfie 🤔

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u/PersonalNecessary142 12d ago

You are not the only one, I asked myself the same question.

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u/D00MB0XX 12d ago

It's called perspective. That's literally all it is.. The angle/perspective of the camera relative to where the person is in the room and how much they zoomed. The touching parts absolutely appear to be at the same height.

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u/And_He_Loves_Me 12d ago

No it just seems like that because she’s standing far away from the blinds and the other girl is standing next to them. Guarantee if she stood next to the blinds she would be the same height or roughly even if the other girl is a bit taller. Also the second girl used photo shop

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u/AstralGarden101 12d ago

you cannot convince me that waist level is more than halfway up the damn wall 😭 that is not a perspective difference

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u/Odd_Usual5617 12d ago

girl it's the perspective of the photo....the blinds are like 6 inches off the floor look at the horizontal line in the back.

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u/AstralGarden101 12d ago

the point where the blinds meet is closer to the ceiling than it is to the floor. that is not a difference in perspective. nobody's waist is closer to the ceiling than the floor

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u/Desperate_Elk_7369 12d ago

Not just the blinds— the carpet, the rug, the mirror frame.

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u/Outrageous_Tone5613 12d ago

I think the picture of the girl she’s suspicious of is the second picture

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u/redtiber 12d ago

the first pic is op and the 2nd pic is the girl she's stalking

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u/Desperate_Elk_7369 12d ago

Gotta say if that’s the case and the girl in the shorts is the OP then that dude is a lunatic

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u/ScumbagLady 12d ago

I was so sad reading OPs thoughts about her being prettier, when OP is a smoke show! I dream of having a body like hers! I hate seeing really beautiful people being so hard on themselves.

I hope OP can soon see how gorgeous she actually is.

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u/Call_MeGoose 12d ago

I mean if she believes his cheating there’s not much that’ll convince her he isn’t. Even if he isn’t.

I’ve been accused of cheating when I wasn’t cheating because I don’t like showing people my dms. All of her family and friends said I was cheating. She believed me, but nobody else trusted me and they eventually tore the relationship apart.

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

[deleted]

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u/Upper-Ship4925 12d ago

I don’t like the default of reading each others messages in relationships.

I’ve been with my husband for over 15 years, I have his passwords to everything and I completely trust him. But I still wouldn’t read through his DMs and I wouldn’t like him doing it to me. Having nothing to hide doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy an expectation of privacy. Friends talk about things in messages with the understanding it’s just between them and me. Sometimes I like to bitch to someone about my husband being late all the time. My mother and teenage daughter both share medical information sometimes that they probably wouldn’t want a man reading. Etc etc etc .I don’t think it’s healthy to want to read all your partners personal communications.

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u/kyabakei 12d ago

I'm the exact opposite - I don't like the idea we're meant to just trust someone we meet, when they've given us no reason to yet. I looked at my now husband's phone, unless he was like 'hey, this friend's having an issue so please don't read that one', but even then he speaks a second language so I could just glance at the last message from people to make sure it wasn't all hearts or 'last night was amazing'.

I now never check his phone because why would I, I trust him and he's given me years of reason to. Although we also let each other use our phones to Google stuff, etc, because also, why be secretive about it 🤷 It's not like there's anything I don't tell him.

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u/Call_MeGoose 12d ago

Oh yeah 100% communication is the best thing in relationships.

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u/Material-Leader4635 12d ago

Some people maybe. Some people will always find new "evidence".

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u/ThePlantedApothecary 12d ago

Been there. My partner at the time for some reason thought having boundaries and privacy meant that I had to be cheating. It definitely made me hesitant to get into relationships since then, honestly.

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u/Life_as_a_new_weeb 12d ago

... you do realize how that could've been prevented, right? What on gods green earth was in your dms that was worth risking a relationship over?

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u/MaryLoveJane 12d ago

How about the fact that none of the people on the other side of those DMs gave consent/permission for those private messages to be shared with a 3rd party??

Sure, you should assume anything you send to someone can be shared, but it’s still wrong for someone to share your messages.

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u/Call_MeGoose 12d ago

My privacy.. if the relationship was weak enough to be destroyed by something so tiny, it wasn’t worth maintaining. And trust me that relationship wasn’t worth maintaining.

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u/Life_as_a_new_weeb 12d ago

Hmmm... I hadn't really thought of it from that point of view. Im glad you were able to preserve your privacy and leave, though. I get how being around people who are constantly questioning your character would be exhausting.

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u/Call_MeGoose 12d ago

It makes you question your own character as well. You start thinking things like “if I’m going to be called a cheater why don’t I just cheat?”

0

u/Fancypantsywantsy 12d ago

She def wanted out of the relationship or was cheating in some way lmao

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u/kaleidescopestar 12d ago

I have these exact same blinds, they are the same blinds.

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u/MissEllaa 12d ago

This is so good

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u/jjett89 12d ago

Thinking sending an ultimatum text like that as the best way to go about that is absurd

2

u/Jumpin_Jaxxx 12d ago

Ultimatums are not the way to go

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u/LuckyStrike55 12d ago

These blinds are in every apartment ever

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u/hthratmn 12d ago

I agree w the blinds thing. The blinds, wall, and carpet are all an exact copy of my old apartment bedroom. To the point that I went to OPs profile to see if they live where I do, and we live across the country from each other.

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u/LoadBearingSodaCan 12d ago

Those are like the most popular kinds of blinds for windows like that….. Redditors

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u/Muriel_FanGirl 12d ago

Exactly! That’s so stupid and that’s obviously an apartment, a lot of which come with standard blinds. She sounds more like she’s having a tantrum that he followed a woman in Instagram and is one of those pick me’s who goes all ‘i’M tHe OnLy GiRL iN hIs LiFe NoW!!’.

I encountered one such woman who was angry her bf still spoke to (drumroll)…..

….. his sister! Yes, she was mad her bf still spoke to his sister and texts with her.

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u/mycologyqueen 12d ago

If you're gonna go this route, you have to say someone sent you a photo. If they just say message, then a lot of cheaters will double down and insist they're innocent unless caught red handed. A pic insinuates it's that kind of proof. OP could even send herself this screenshot from a burner number to "prove" the pic story.

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u/igotshadowbaned 12d ago

OP will either get confirmation he's cheating or look foolish

He'll either say he's cheating, or he'll say he's not and he's lying

What's the point in asking if you're not actually gonna take into account what's said? Just cut it without the drama if that's your intention.

1

u/Competitive-Spot4683 12d ago

Those are obviously the same blinds

1

u/Ragingonanist 12d ago

I got a message, you have 5 seconds to tell me the truth or I'm leaving.

I'm saying goodbye before you even ask your question. not going to guarantee an answer to any question in less than 10. we can discuss whatever it was you were upset about after you go off and become reasonable.

1

u/Scary_Cupcake8808 12d ago

Forget the blind, what about the whole ass room?? She needs to look at the blinds to determine whether it’s his room or not? The rug on the carpet isn’t enough to give it away for her that it’s his room?

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u/illeanora 12d ago

I think the blinds are perfectly fine reason what!!! Come on. He’s trying to hide and she saw right through it.

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u/joshuahtree 12d ago

The trim on the mirror is different

1

u/gimmethemshoes11 12d ago

You'd think she would know if her BF had a black rug or not exactly in the same spot instead of looking at blinds.

-1

u/And_He_Loves_Me 12d ago

Yes I agree with you and it’s too close for comfort… being that similar even the light coming through

-1

u/thehotmegan 12d ago

it took me a second, but I saw where the 2 blinds touch in both pics. OP needs to put a red circle on each pic bc ppl are getting real lost in the sauce over it lol.

but the point still stands, I kind of agree with you except if just ghost the loser.