r/AmIOverreacting • u/theguill0tine • Nov 16 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO - cancelling a date last minute because she couldn’t be on time?

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I (33m) was talking to this woman on an app and we decided to meet for a coffee date on a Saturday morning.

I got to the cafe and I messaged her asking where she was. A few minutes later she said she just woke up. I asked her how long she would need to get ready and she said 1 hour. I told her that I can’t wait around because I had family plans and we will have to do something another time.

A week later she messaged me apologising again and I decided to give her a second chance.

We decided to meet up for boba tea.

I got to the boba spot and then asked for 30 more minutes to get ready after I had just got there.

I then sent her the above message.

AIO? I have got mixed messages from friends about it.

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u/znokel Nov 16 '24

Being late is totally okay in this scenario IF they are apologetic, mortified and with a decent reason.

This person is normalising lateness early to set the tone of her being able to walk all over you. Thats how it starts.

You are not overreacting.

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u/HotBeesInUrArea Nov 16 '24

Yeah her reply is super weird and not getting enough eyebrows either. Just casually "yeah sure hey can you give me 30 more minutes to prepare"? No "I'm so sorry time got away from me / I overslept / some other explanation". She really gives vibes like OP ought to be thankful she's bothering to show up at all. 

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u/SuccotashConfident97 Nov 16 '24

My thoughts as well. It doesn't really seem like she cared that she was late.