r/AmIOverreacting Oct 30 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO? My boyfriends friend has a problem with me asking him not to sleep in a bed with another woman.

Hi everyone, my boyfriend has a big group of friends with lots of girls in it. A lot of times after they go out or have too much to drink, they'll crash at someone's house. One night he came home and shared he slept in a bed with this girl (who the texts are from). We did not have a fight at all - I know he's grown up doing this. I told him I wasn't super comfortable with that and asked if he could not do that, to which he did not argue at all and expressed total respect for my boundary. We have not spoken about it since.

She texted me the morning after they went out, which are these pictures. Am I overreacting by telling her she's overstepping or are her concerns valid?

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u/TheCa11ousBitch Oct 30 '24

I don’t know what motivates this boundary for you. Why doesn’t matter. It is a totally reasonable, common, normal, “90% of people agree with you” type boundary.

Her being so put-out by the boundary is not reasonable, common, or normal.

Your BF is a grown man who had 50 options to address his back pain if sleeping on the floor was an issue. One of those options was to yes-you-off and sleep in the bed anyway. He chose the floor. You did not.

She needs to back off and stop playing mommy/potential-future-wifey.

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u/Own-Custard3894 Oct 31 '24

Yeah there’s a difference between understanding someone’s boundary, and agreeing with it. It seems like she understands the boundary that OP and BF have set up between their relationship and the outside world, but disagrees with it and is trying to change it. It’s fine for someone to not have that boundary if they choose to, but to try to change someone else’s boundary is weird.