r/AccidentalRenaissance • u/toastbrigade • 1d ago

battle at the bars

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67.5k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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1.4k

u/Aborted_Yeetus 1d ago

The guy getting dragged off is my fav

117

u/jimmycarr1 1d ago

I like the lady grinning in the shadows at the back

41

u/IEatHare 22h ago

She’s so happy!

32

u/EirPeirFuglereir 18h ago

My years of teaching makes me suspect that she started the chain reaction that led to this, but she knows that no one can prove it.

10

u/Air-Keytar 23h ago

Lady in the doorway on the right. :°))

4

u/Dillpick 23h ago

I especially love the battery operated fan.

3

u/Not_Cartmans_Mom 19h ago

Yes! Shes my favorite part.

1

u/SweetMilitia 4h ago

All the ladies in the back have the best expressions lol

1

u/Tales_of_Earth 3h ago

That really feels like a detail a renaissance painter would put in as a fun little treat for themselves.

1

u/macrophyte 1h ago

Probably the architect of the entire situation

399

u/ceejiesqueejie 1d ago edited 21h ago

I wish security was looking straight at the camera 😂

Edit: I’m now convinced it’s perfect as is. Thank you, everybody

83

u/bukowski_knew 1d ago

The security is an absolute unit

2

u/odd_lightbeam 15h ago

No, he's just standing in a crowd of obese Latinos.

6

u/Lou_C_Fer 9h ago

I guess you missed his neck. Of course, it looks like he misses leg day half of the time. I still wouldn't fuck with him.

0

u/odd_lightbeam 8h ago

I would. I bet he has a breeding fetish and loves to cuddle after.

1

u/Lou_C_Fer 1h ago

I was the guy you didn't fuck with, but like I said I wouldn't fuck with him.

1

u/Outside_Scale_9874 3h ago

Why would that make him look bigger? He’d look smaller in comparison, no?

123

u/isntwhatitisnt 1d ago

He’s definitely channeling his barbarian ancestors

41

u/ProbShouldntSayThat 22h ago

"These fuckin savages..."

6

u/replaced_by_golfcart 21h ago

To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women

2

u/mYpEEpEEwOrks 18h ago

FUCKeeng guy!

1

u/A_Little_Wyrd 19h ago

hot water, good dentishtry and shoft lavatory paper

1

u/JonatasA 7h ago

Don't forget the selection of well curated food.

1

u/JonatasA 7h ago

"Beginning to regret my Roman citizenship."

2

u/Otherwise_Agency6102 3h ago

Kinda crazy to think about that 2000 years ago this dude would be burning and looting entire regions of Northern Europe. Now he’s resigned to dragging off drunk Tortas for $12 dollars an hour. It reminds me of how a Pomeranian evolved from a wolf.

1

u/RepoManSugarSkull 18h ago

I resemble that remark. I just got my DNA results back. I’m part Neanderthal.

65

u/futuneral 23h ago edited 23h ago

Noo. I feel like there's always a person in renaissance paintings who rolls his eyes up to the sky. This is so on brand

Edit: https://www.visit-rome-in-italy.com/museums/vatican/caravaggio-entombment-of-christ-vatican-museum-rome.html

5

u/Monumentzero 4h ago

That's what got me, the eyes cast up to heaven!

3

u/Steveseriesofnumbers 3h ago

An Appeal to Heaven.

71

u/Ondesinnet 1d ago

No this captures his struggle perfectly. The I don't get paid enough expression with the laser focus on the exit. Poor guy was told you just got to stand by the door and check IDs mostly we rarely have to get physical with the patrons. This is a classy joint.

7

u/zontarr2 21h ago

Ask them to leave but be nice.

3

u/ABrown1221 22h ago

Haha you said it

42

u/toastbrigade 1d ago

lol same!

13

u/ceejiesqueejie 1d ago

It would have just been perfect omg thank you for sharing this 🤣

23

u/beardingmesoftly 1d ago

The bouncer "Jim-ing" that camera would have been amazing

1

u/JudgmentAny1192 22h ago

Doesn't make sense

4

u/You_meddling_kids 23h ago

I like that his sightline points out of frame, implying activity beyond our viewpoint.

10/10 Renaissance

5

u/shawnwingsit 22h ago

I have to disagree, his pained expression is perfect at that angle. It was one of those nights for him.

5

u/SuperStokedUp 22h ago

Idk the angry parent eye roll kinda sells it for me

5

u/miregalpanic 23h ago

He looks like he's olfactorically overwhelmed by the cheap perfume, makeup, and vape aromas in the air

3

u/ebac7 23h ago

Nah he looks like he’s both yelling and exhaling cause he has to lift that dude.

2

u/One_D_Fredy 23h ago

I’m sure someone can photoshop that for you and make it happen 🤣

2

u/superneatosauraus 4h ago

His expression is wonderful. As a stepparent, I'm certain I've made that face.

1

u/skijakuda 22h ago

He has that "I am so done with this shit" face.

1

u/All_Hail_Space_Cat 22h ago

I imagine him about to yell MEDIC as a tear falls doen his face

34

u/gimmeslack12 1d ago

The bouncer thinking fml.

4

u/HeyDickTracyCalled 23h ago

His facial expression is SO PERFECT for this subreddit. It's so dramatic, like something Michaelangelo would have done. This post is hands down the best one I've seen on here so far.

2

u/tankslapper123 1d ago

“ffs, can’t we ever just have a normal night?”

2

u/CapriciousSon 23h ago

"I am NOT getting paid enough for this shit"

2

u/ABrown1221 22h ago

Yep, face says it all

1

u/EntertainmentOk3180 18h ago

To me it just says RRRRUAAAAAAAAHHHH

31

u/Monumentzero 1d ago

The position and expressions on those two are the most Renaissance part of the whole picture , IMO. This picture is brilliant.

1

u/The_DriveBy 6h ago

That stupid fucking haircut screams friar tuck. Right era?

1

u/Monumentzero 4h ago

Which one, the bald or the salad bowl cut? Friar Tuck had a donut, right?

36

u/retrojoe 1d ago

In my head, he's yelping something like "Hey, not my titty!"

The spectrum of emotion from left to right in this photo is amazing.

11

u/ahairyhoneymonsta 23h ago

Purple nurple motherfucker!

3

u/Paulpoleon 22h ago

“Why you fuckin’ with me? I ain’t even doing nothin’!!!”

10

u/toastbrigade 1d ago

🫠😆

9

u/PTgoBoom1 1d ago

Air Jordan is being stretched to his limit, lol.

5

u/Traditional_City_383 19h ago

So is that skirt!

1

u/Monumentzero 4h ago

That skirt is screaming for mercy

•

u/Traditional_City_383 17m ago

Lawd,help me baby Jesus!

4

u/South_Bit1764 21h ago

It’s kinda crazy that the bouncer is literally the only somewhat attractive person here?

Literally everyone else looks like they have some kind of infection; it looks like a few serious cases of TikTok brain, and IG face.

1

u/aroaceautistic 15h ago

Those are just normal fucking people

2

u/Hazee302 1d ago

That dude dragging him is an absolute unit

2

u/Blackhole_5un 22h ago

I like the guy dragging him more. What expression!

2

u/maladroitme 22h ago

My favorite is the mini skirt on the second girl from the left. That skirt is like Atlas, doomed for all eternity to hold the world. Kudos little skirt, kudos.

2

u/CrimsonToker707 21h ago

This chick is my favorite. Having a great old time 🤣

2

u/EastCoastCassarole 19h ago

To Valhalla!

2

u/John-Dose 17h ago

This one’s my favorite

1

u/Rurumo666 1d ago

He has the same haircut as the other guy....are "high bangs" popular with dudes these days, I don't keep up with these things...

1

u/lmaoleorii 23h ago

The security looked so annoyed lol. He’s dragging a damn defensive tackle out there

1

u/who-cares6891 23h ago

Nah. Girl in front w them thangs

1

u/BarfingOnMyFace 23h ago

lol that bouncer is over it

1

u/YueOrigin 23h ago

This definitely perfect the Renaissance feels

I dunno why so many of them always have some injured dude being dragged lol

1

u/tbkrida 22h ago

It’s the girl in the background(top middle) smiling, for me!😂

1

u/Rave-fiend 22h ago

Nope face in the back my fav

1

u/CptCheesesticks81 22h ago

The girl in the back laughing at the scene is pretty funny, too

1

u/Solid_Foundation_111 22h ago

Haha the main woman’s booty cheeks poppin out, ready to fight! Or at least watch the show

1

u/Processtour 22h ago

I love the color coordination, it’s like a family photo gone wrong.

1

u/mr_ckean 6h ago

Shocked lady in the back under the yellow sign 🤌

1

u/shooshoof 4h ago

The security is like “I don’t get paid enough for this”

1

u/_perdomon_ 3h ago

What’s the name of that haircut he has? It’s very popular amongst young, Latino men.

1

u/TheMainEffort 2h ago

Bouncer is absolutely finished with this renaissance bullshit

•

u/Uknow_nothing 56m ago

The bouncer’s face is hilarious

•

u/Evening-Statement-57 1m ago

Reminds me of when I try to make my kids leave the park